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"Doing what I can"
SFV JUNKIE!!!
Picture of smshybug
Posted
Are you a Martha or Maxine?

*Maxine's Way* Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

*Martha's Way * Just **** the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake! You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it, anyway!
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*Maxine's Way* To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

*Martha's Way * Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix, keep it in the pantry for up to a year.

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*Maxine's Way* When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

*Martha's Way * Go to the bakery! They'll even decorate it for you.

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*Maxine's Way* If you accidentally over salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up."

*Martha's Way * If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too bad. Please recite with me the real woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes!"

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*Maxine's Way* Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.

*Martha's Way * Celery? Never heard of it!

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*Maxine's Way* Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

*Martha's Way * The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust, so I don't.

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*Maxine's Way* Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

*Martha's Way * Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink!

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*Maxine's Way* If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

*Martha's Way * Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you.

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*Maxine's Way* Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

*Martha's Way * Leftover wine??????????? HELLO !!!!!!!

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As usual, if you don't forward this to 1 of your friends within the next 5 minutes, your belly button will unscrew and your butt will fall off.? Really... it's true! Have I ever lied to you?
 
Posts: 5294 | Location: Not Where You Are | Registered: 26 January 2005Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
At A loss for Words - NOT!
Picture of Bishop
Posted Hide Post
I will do it the Maxim way find a cute shortie to do it for me!


Kidding


http://myspace.com/bishop169 The Freak'n Deacon ----Better To Ask Forgiveness Than Permission!

 
Posts: 1348 | Location: Derry, NH | Registered: 20 April 2007Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
"Doing what I can"
SFV JUNKIE!!!
Picture of smshybug
Posted Hide Post
Figures!
 
Posts: 5294 | Location: Not Where You Are | Registered: 26 January 2005Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
"KARMA? What is that anyways?"
Board Beacon Parent
Picture of Dallasblair82
Posted Hide Post
Leftover wine???????what the heck is that???????



"I find an insignificant satisfaction in sitting on my television and watching my couch!

Dallas Blair http://www.myspace.com/dallasblair
Lost in Washington state in the rain

DISCLAIMER This is my personal opinion. Please take it as such! If i have offened you in any way please feel free to email me and tell me all about it me at idontgiveArats455@sowhat.com
 
Posts: 773 | Location: Washington State | Registered: 24 October 2007Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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