Yesterday my 2 yr old daughter asked me, "Mommy where's my daddy?" I was so taken off guard that I just didn't even know what to say. She's only two and I figured I had at least until age five before I got that question. I haven't heard from her father in over a year, and I'm honestly not sure why he decided to have no contact with our child anymore. My daughter asked the question several times and at one point even went over to the widow to look for him as she continued asking the question. She took a two hour nap and that question was the first thing she asked when she woke up. How do I the question for a two year old that I don't even know the answer to?

My daughter is 3 and has asked that question already. She has never seen her father and probably, hopefully never will. I simply tell her that she doesn't have one. I have resorted to stating "mommy wanted you so much that she didn't want to wait for a daddy." For now that will suffice for me. My daughter says "okay" and usually leaves it at that. She has male influence in her life and her Papa (my dad) is the father figure in her life. She knows no different and is happy.

When they are old enough to understand, you can explain to them what happened. I do not ever have any intentions of speaking ill about my daughter's sperm donor, and I will tell her the truth.

I guess all you can do is answer the question in simple terms that she will understand and then move her along from the subject. The time to explain things will be when she is older.

Now, Kai does know what a daddy is. She has lots of friends who have their daddy and she grasps the concept I guess. Not fully but she knows.

As long as you are there and care for your daughter, then your daughter should be fine

My daughter is 3, and asked that question several times. It started, I believe, because she hears the other children at daycare talking about their fathers. To "Iam1975", tell your child where you last knew the father lived and give the child some insight on the dad, like his height, weight, and funny things he did. For my daughter, she was looking to identify with that unknown part of her. My daughter wants a story to tell her friends; she doesn't really want to know where is, or what happened. She's too young to even appreciate that type of question. So I gave her nuggets of info that she could repeat when the other kids sit around and talk about "my daddy did ..." She can join that conversation now vicariously through my memories. For the record, I don't know why he bounced either but he did and we're here. So we will live the best we can despite his absence.

Hi Tango Juliet! Just seeing your posts. Fellow Maryland resident here. And are you a writer too?

quote:

Originally posted by Tango Juliet:
My daughter is 3, and asked that question several times. It started, I believe, because she hears the other children at daycare talking about their fathers. To "Iam1975", tell your child where you last knew the father lived and give the child some insight on the dad, like his height, weight, and funny things he did. For my daughter, she was looking to identify with that unknown part of her. My daughter wants a story to tell her friends; she doesn't really want to know where is, or what happened. She's too young to even appreciate that type of question. So I gave her nuggets of info that she could repeat when the other kids sit around and talk about "my daddy did ..." She can join that conversation now vicariously through my memories.

I like how you explained that. I usually respond with keep it simple/age appropriate.....and that's a great explanation of what simple/age appropriate is about.