So. My first post here. It is also my story.

In March of 2006 my girlfriend and I found out she was pregnant. I was 29 at the time and she was 23. We had been dating for 3 years up until that point. However, we had broken up prior to the pregnancy and were living in separate apartments. As soon as we found out about her pregnancy we decided to get married. Things were fine until my wife actually gave birth. After that she had a LOT of trouble adjusting to the responsibility of being a parent.

My wife left me and my son back in October of 2007. She told me that she did not want to be a parent anymore and that she also did not want to be with me. She went to go live with her sister who had recently moved back into the area to be closer to her and her nephew.

My wife had also gotten a part time retail job a month prior to her leaving us. I encouraged her to get a weekend job so she could go out and be social and also get some extra "fun money" to go shopping and spend on herself.

Then it all came crashing down.

My wife met a guy at work and started seeing him shortly after she got the job. He was a co-worker. I wasn't stupid and caught on fairly quickly on what was going on. He was also married, by the way. I checked our cell phone bill online and saw that they talked to each other several times a day. I was crushed and my trust was destroyed in the process. Upon calling her out on this she decided that she was going to leave.

There are other details to this story but basically she has been gone since October. She now says that she loves this new guy and that she doesn't want to be with me. She also says that she loves our son but hates being a parent.

I have not sought a divorce yet, nor have I taken steps to get child support. I want to have joint custody with her and be civil. Right now she is staying with him at our old apartment during the day so that we don't have to put him in daycare. That is essentially why I haven't asked for any money from her because I figure that is money that would have just gone to some daycare provider.

I'm very confused by all this. I'm conflicted. There are moments that I want her to come back home. There are other times that I just want to move on emotionally. My gut feeling is that she will get bored with this new guy in a couple of months and come home. But what if I'm wrong?

Does my wife not want to be with me because of the life/responsibilities that I represent? I can safely say that we are close friends...but my heart is absolutely broken over this.

Any advice?

My story is kinda like yours (except there was 3 years of marriage and 3 kids) my ex left me for a woman at work. I thought like you, that he would get bored and then come back home. Well he did, but our relationship was way worse than it was to begin with. I could never trust him again, and he was never faithful again. He told me that he never got the chance to be young (we were married at 18 and parents at 19) and so he wanted to take the opportunity to do it now. He just didn't like living life with so much resposibility. My ex and I are pretty good friends now, we are close, and I think it's best that way. We get along as friends but not in a relationship.
I know with me, I would have always wondered if we could have made it if I hadn't tried again, so I am glad I did. However those were quite possibly the worst 7 months of my life. It is very hard to forgive and forget when someone has hurt you like it, and if you are going to try and make things work thats what you have to do. It's always really hard to be in relationship without trust.
Those are just my experiences, I hope it helps. And Good luck to you and your little man!

That was the main complaint that my wife had - that she was "too young" to be a mother.

Oddly enough this is my second marriage. I was married at age 24 to a single mother with a 5 year old. I had actually helped raise that child from age 6 months to age 5 years. However, our relationship was pretty unstable and there were many issues that we could not overcome.

But yes, I'm not sure how long it's going to take for my wife to grow up. I have always wanted a family, hence my lack of hesitation in marrying a single mother several years ago. I love children and I've always wanted a family. My current wife never wanted either, although she has admitted recently that she did want to give me those things because she loved me. She just didn't expect all of the responsibility.

It's hard for me to hate her. I do love her. If anything, her pregnancy and being by her side every step of the way just made me love her even more. Oddly enough, all that has happened since she got pregnant made her want to be with me even less.