Hi, everyone, I am pregnant and just found out on wednesday that I am having a girl. Earlier this year I had a miscarriage by my current baby's father. So basically the agreement was that he could name the baby because this is his only child and I have 4 others...The name he chose really upset me. Back in August his best friend who is female was about 8 months pregnant and I must mention that she is also married. She came for a visit and he broke up with me because I asked to meet her. I was about 3 or 4 weeks pregnant at that time. I was pretty devastated. It wasn't because he had something going on with his friend, this I am sure of, it is because my ex husband posed as a woman online trying to get my boyfriend to meet him (the woman). There was a big mix up, When my ex husband hit me with the chat sessions and what was said, I had already been fighting iwth my boyfriend about the pregnancy. Since we lost the first baby he didn't want to go through it again and wanted me to have an abortion, we were actually fighting because he would not go with me to have the procedure done. I guess he could not handle it. Before the incident with my ex husband I actually trusted my boyfriend. When I heard about what had happened and the fact that my boyfriend didn't even tell me about it, I was pretty upset. I felt betrayed and what's more lost my trust. So we broke up for 4 days only to get back together and break up again when I asked to meet his friend. I was really trying to be good about things although my trust was shaky, he didn't beleive me and actually broke up with me because one, I asked, and two he didn't beleive my reasons for asking were based on good intentions like I meant them. He thought I was being jealous. From my view I was making an attempt to show him I wanted to make it up to him. Now, he wants to name out baby after that friend. When he told me I blew up.I couldn't handle it. I asked if he could please pick another name and he said that was the name he chose. Then he told me if I didn't let the baby's name be as such then the baby was all mine. After all of the fighting I spoke to him later and he told me that by not letting him name the baby as per our deal I was taking away his only part in this. I get to be pregnant and yes he will be a dad, but he said I was limiting his participation. I did agree yesterday to give in, but today I felt ill about it. We then decided to call the baby by her middle name, whcih is the same as my aunt's as well.I felt really awful because unlike other dads he has actually been there, gone to appointments and everything. I am still in love with him and he knows this, he has said that whether or not we get back together depends on me. He still sleeps with me and acts like he cares for me, he just no longer tells me he loves me. I just wish I knew what I did that was so bad for him to shut his feelings off so easily. I feel that I my reactions that led to our break up were a little justified. Too much was coming at me so fast. I have pstered him a little because I feel that he broke up with me for unfair reasons. Then when this bomb was dropped on me I felt that he was being impossible because he wasn't recognizing how it made me feel nor did he acknowledge that possibly that I only asked to meet her with good intentions when he broke it off with me. He is stuck on this name. I don't know how I should feel. I pretty much made a deal with the devil.That is just how he feels. This whole incident almost ruined xmas for us. Was it wrong for me to compromise on this?Am I overreacting about the name he chose? I just want to be fair. I didn't intend to hurt him and really I think I did. I feel that he is naming my baby after another woman. He is good friend with her and her husband. He has never dated her or anything. I just feel a little belittled by this whole thing and he will not budge. Any feed back on this would be great.T6hanks.

I think that it is wrong for him to put conditions on you, your "love", and your child. If this man is willing to walk away from his CHILD because he can't name it then maybe he doesn't deserve to be a father. At this point he (and you) should be thinking only of this baby first.
I am the mother of one and have one on the way. My husband doesn't feel like having a baby so he filed for divorce. Frankly, yes, it hurts, and yes, it is frightening, but I think that any parent that walks away so easily, especially at the start, is doing you and the child a favor. What if he decides you should breastfeed and you don't want to? Is he going to threaten to leave then? I think you should stick to your heart, let him either cave or walk away. Bringing this baby into the world will be stressful enough without this drama. Love yourself and your baby more then him and his manipulations. Besides, he will be involved...even if it is only through child support enforcement!

hi ....i have a 6 month old little boy and i totally agree with vrdrago. my sons father left me when i was 41/2 months pregnant and yeah it hurt...hurts because i really loved him but i'm glad that he got out before my son was able to get attached to him. If your man is that controlling about a name there is no telling what he might have flipped over ya know? anyway it all works out in the end and the MOST important thing should always be the loveand support of your babies.

Thanks for the welcome , Laurie...I don't know what to think right now. Here, I have a guy who is there for the baby and even excited about it and has helped me through some things yet has some hang ups. I guess what I am saying is, I was hoping for a more objective answer. I know it is common to say that he can hit the road. What I really want to know is what everyone thinks about the fact that I left naming the baby up to him in the first place, I was trying to involve him. Yet, I am uncomfortable with his choice. I don't know what to do. I asked that he name the baby something else to save me the grief. He thinks I shouldn't have a problem with his choice. He doesn't see the problem at all with what he chose. Does anyone think that his choice could be innocent or that it is a deliberate attempt to keep me upset?

Hi friends hope your holidays were filled with love and fun.Now as a young father preparing for the birth of my twins I was very excited I did every thing for their mother late night store runs you name it, basicly my participation in this blessing was to make sure their mother was happy and healthy but most of all stress free. Sadly my son died but my angel my little princess survived and with both children we split the names one for each child. So for him to react that way was very selfish and as a man for him to be so defensive their is probably something there so be carefull and just keep your self calm and focused because it's your body, and more so your baby because it's in [B]your} body.Take this in consideration if he's going to lash out on you for something this small I would be concerned about his attitude twards the baby meaning the connection you will have being the mother he might feel intimidated or jealous. (good luck)

Welcome Holding the bag, I somewhat your situation. My ex did not put any demands on our daughter's name. he just had someone call me and state that he was married. I know how frustrating and confessed you are. A little bit different situation, but I know where are you are coming from. Hang in! if you just want to talked