I know I am being way too hard on myself, but right now I feel like because of turning up pregnant that all the things I like are no longer really mine, and that I should be feeling a bit down because of everything. I feel like I shouldn't be browsing Victoria's Secret catalogs anymore, should not be enjoying my "single and free" music anymore. I have called a complete halt to all spending (except for gas, food, and paying bills)so I can save for my little package that's coming in December. I know that I am just punishing myself, and I do have an appt with a therapist to discuss all my emotions(and they are myriad right now with hormones gone whacko!)but I just wanted to vent here.

bnhgal...you are being hard on yourself...but you are being focused, too, and that is good. Be focused...stay focused, but enjoy what you enjoy, because it's yours, more so than anything you have, what you feel and what you love are really the most important things we will ever have in our lives.
Good luck to you and your package...
Good on you for seeing a professional...I've had a therapist for over a year now, and when nobody else is around, she's a great friend.

I too stopped my spending, well buying the shoes that I so love! LOL I have a lot of shoes and I know this, but I think you need things just like your little person. I buy something for me each time I go shopping for my son. It may only be a candy bar, but I gotta have something for me! Yes, our lives have changed with the new additions, BUT life still goes on. Dont stop loving you. Buy that lingerie if ya want it!


Yo

I don't know... I have always found that when I shop It eases me. When I get upset and stressed I go shopping 9 times out of 10 I don't buy anything but maybe a new shirt. Since I found out I was pregnant I haven't been able to buy anything with out thinking is that actually something I would wear.
I went shopping a couple of weeks ago with my aunt who graciously was paying. She wanted to buy my new maternity wardrobe. (sometimes she want's to do something you can't help but go along) I couldn't find anything I want to commit to. Finally, after all day of shopping and trying on stuff I came home with one dress for church and a pair of shorts and three shirts and one pair of capris. Two days later she showed up with 4 more outfits that I liked but thought was waayyy to expensive.(why is it that these clothes are that expensive and you only wear them for about 7 months???????)
I don't know if I helped...but I thought since I am new to this site I might add a little that you aren't the only one feeling that way.

quote:

why is it that these clothes are that expensive and you only wear them for about 7 months???????

I've never understood that either. *lol*

bnhgal: I know how you feel. I feel like I have no right to be me anymore, like I'm losing myself already. But I have every right to like the music I like and do all the things enjoy, and so do you. It's okay to feel this way now and then, just, please don't let it take over you. I know it's easier said than done, but you have to try. (I'm going through it, too, so you're definitely NOT alone.)

I believe that a child should grow up knowing that 'mommy' is part of who you are, not you're entire identity. DO NOT allow yourself to become a shadow. Your little one deserves to see you in all your glory. You need not feel guilty about buying yourself something or taking time to yourself now OR after baby is born. Taking care of you is important, too, and it allows you to be a better parent when you feel good about yourself.

Good luck to you, hon. *hugs*

I hope I've helped you at least a tiny bit. ;o)