Hey guys, new to this whole support thing. But I know I need something. I have been a single Mom of 2 for quite some time now. My oldest being 15 and my youngest 11. (boy and girl respectively) My life has had many ups and downs and I always seem to keep my head up. Recently, I found out I am pregnant. Unexpectedly by my boyfriend of about a year. He is much younger than I. He's a fisherman who is in the ocean 70% of the time and he is from NC, where as I am from MA. His family is very religious and he says his grandmother will disown him to have a child out of wedlock. I want to keep this baby but I also want to have regard for his feelings. He really is a very responsible, beautiful person. My pregnancy occurred while I had an IUD. So it was clearly accidental. We were normally careful, but ONE TIME didn't use protection. I'm very upset because I view his grandmothers position as being judgemental. She doesn't know me. Does anybody have any advice??

Hello. Wow! Sounds like you have a lot of thinking to do. The question I have for you is, does HE want the child? His grandmother shouldn't have anything to do with this decision. It is what you and your boyfriend want that matters. Have you both decided what you want without adding the noise of what other people may think? Do what makes the both of you happy. Someday his grandmother may not be around but the decision you make will always be with you. Just my 2 cents.

You are absolutely right. It will just be difficult. His Grandmother raised him in the South, and is very proud that none of her children or grandchildren have ever had children out of wedlock. He cried when he told me of his fear. Like a little boy. I want to tell him in a nice way to grow up and be a man, ya know? He is a very respectful person. So kind and selfless. I hope he comes around. I'm 32, this will probably be my last baby and I want it. I know I can take care of it. Anyway, thanks for your reply.

I agree you should be thinking about what is best for you and your boyfriend stop worring about what others might think. I have a child that is now 17 and my daughter is 2 there was a lot of adjusting to do but we do ok.I was 35 when i had my daughter even though there is a lot of stress in my life it was well worth it.

Hey sunshyne and welcome. I know I am a little late on this post. I have been working a lot of over time lately.
You want this baby. What does he expect you to do? If he is very religious there would not be an option of terminating and that does not sound like an option for you.
Keep the baby, have the baby and raise him/her the best way you know how. Your boyfriend will catch up with you. I know this is easier said than done. But from what you are saying what other option do you have? The baby is here regardless of what his grandmother will think. It is just as much a sin to terminate and/or lie to her about it as it is to have the baby out of wedlock in the first place. You can't blank out one sin by committing another. This might be something he could remind his grandmother of when he needs to tell her. Please keep in mind I personally am not calling you a sinner or your boyfriend. I am simply talking about what you have written. I am also assuming that they are Christians, if I had to take a guess I would say Baptist.

I think honesty is going to be the best policy here and reminding someone of the things the bible says about forgiving sin and that all of us are sinners. Jesus came to save us from ourselves.
I do hope it works out for you. There is a plan.
God bless you and yours.

Sunshyne, please don't take the Grandmother's position as an attack on your person, but rather as her take on this situation. But, regardless, this decision is for you and your boyfriend to make. And in the real, real end, really only yours. If you want this baby then have it, about the rest, ask GOD for HIS forgiveness for whatever you see as out of order and HIS guidance to do what you need to do. Blessings!

Hey, I swore I'd be disowned by somebody in my family after having my first pregnancy out of wedlock...they embraced me instead. Some people put the fear of God in you, but when it comes down to reality...that is your family and if they really love you they will accept it regardless.

You and your boyfriend talk about it. Tell him to grow up while your at it(in a nice way) because he should have thought about not having kids before his pants dropped. Everyone knows there is only one 100% proof way to not end up in this situation. He took that risk and needs to be a man about the decision. It is not about what others will think anymore, but what you and he think.

Here is a resounding yes to everything that was just said! And make sure you politely tell him to grow up. If he can help make a baby he can be a man about it, no? Here's hoping and praying the whole situation, that the parents and grandparents will be supportive of you in this.....