I called FOBs mother and she doesnt even consider my daughter as her grandchild, she wants nothing to do with her, and she doesnt even want a picture. I am ok with her not being involved but I cant believe that she wont accept a picture at least. Also she asid that he called her once over the summer and denied that I was having his baby and she doesnt know where he is. Also the really interesting thing is that she informed me that he also has another daughter she is 5 and she lives in TX. So my daughter has a sister that she might never meet b/c I know nothing about her. So how do I break it to her when she gets older that her father denies her existence and that she has a sister that she will never meet?

I missed this post until now, so I'm sorry it took so long to respond. I know that this is hard for you. My son's father has never told his parents of the existence of Ty, so at least you are a step ahead. If she doesn't want a pic, I say it is her loss. I tell my son that his father wasn't ready to be a dad. I won't ever let him know that his father tried to deny him. His father will have to tell him that face to face one day. My son now has a little brother that he doesn't know exists. I haven't told him because it would upset him to know that. His father is married to the mother of that son and sees that son daily. I think it is deplorable and excrusiatingly sad. There isn't anything I can do about it except to love my son w/all that I have. That is all you can do for your daughter. I also keep an envelope w/pics and letters that I never mailed. One day when he's older, I'll let him have that envelope to hand to his father, if he so chooses.

Keep your head up and know that you are doing what is best!

Thankks Tysmom I really appreciate that you are in a similar aituation and you have been strong for your son I know that I have to be strong for my daughter and be there for her b/c he is not. I also decided that I am going to write my daughter a letter to give to her when she is older explaining a few things like that she has a sister in TX and that I made an attempt to contact the grandparents etc, but I am going to write it with the help of my therapist I dont want to tell her something that might hurt her and I dont want it to sound like I am biased against her father b/c no matter how I feel about him he is still her father. Once again thanks, and God bless.

I'm 10 weeks pregnant and the father wants nothing to do with the baby. I'm going to tell my child that thier father was not ready to be a parent and was brave enough to admit it. I don't plan on ever telling my child anything different. The important thing is that your child is wanted and loved by you. Never under estimate the power of a mother's love. Good luck.

You all are so far ahead of me on this one. I haven't even tried too hard to get his Father to deny him completely. The more I read...the stronger I feel I get towards making that move. For now, he's disappeared anyhow...so I can't afford to find the Dad to hear the words.

The thing is is that he denied her to his mother not to me I have no clue how to find him and he doesnt even know that she was born or that she is a girl anything! It is so frustrating...

My mom could never tell me why my dad was not around. She did tell me once when i was younger maybe if i had been a boy then he wwould have been there for me. watxh what you say i hold it aganst my dad now. He wants to be in my life now and he told me why he wasnt around he was a drunk. Now been off the bottle 8 yrs and been apart of my life for 8 yrs. He will kick himself in the a-- one day you will see. For now she is to young i would not say a word till she ask . You never know another man may walk in your life and be a father to her that you have only wished for. i dint ask my mom about my dad till i was 5 so time will only tell. I wish you so much luck and i wish you did not have this hurt in your heart. God never lets it be to much. she will be a strong little girl that will have so much love from mommy that daddy will just not really matter.

I saw him the other day and I froze up and he is gone again, I wasnt meant to talk to him I guess oh well its still his loss right?

As far as grandparents go, I completely understand. The father of my little girl wants a paternity test and I'm guessing until we get that that no one in his family including him wants to have anything to do with her. I dont know how someone can deny a little baby but people do it easier than you would think. His mom and I have talked like 3 times. She acts really nice to your face but its all just an act. She must have taught her son real well, because he acts just like her. He says that after the paternity test is done and he knows for sure that Gwen is his that he will be a "dad". I say that is easier said than done. He doesn't care about her at all. He cares about his car and his other girlfriend. Why waste his time on his daughter and the mother of his kid??? The things people do....

It is still his loss on this, and one day he will regret it. It may take time, but it is meant for you to talk to him. You just need to find your voice. I found mine, and you will find yours. I had never, EVER stood up to a man until I found out I was pregnant. Something just came over me that told me I was strong enough to defend myself and my child. I was shocked at first, but now it comes easily. When the timing is right for you, your voice will be strong enough to make the words that you want to say just flow out like water. Keep your head up and know that it is coming soon enough!