i am 31,,
2 boys,,12 and 8,, live in canada,,
i am 16 weeks prego,,i met the father at work,,we hit it off instanlly,,started dating,,since the first week he was living with me,,,it was all good..
then we found out the first time we slept together we got prego,,we wore a condom,,so i have no idea how this happened...(i know always a chance)
n e way,,,when he found out i was ,,he was happy,,i was exsausted the first 3 months,,i work full time,,and the other boys,,,he was no help at all,,,things started to go down hill in the last of my 3rd month,,he started goin back to his mothers to stay. and not replying to my emails(our way of talking at work,,since we both worked crazy shifts) he didnt come around much,,nothing,,
so one day we had the talk. what he was planning on doin,how he was going to help,,bla bla bla..
this was his answer,,he wasnt going to help,,he didnt want another baby,,,his were 16 and 14 already raised and he didnt want me to tell it he was the dad..
that killed me..being adopted my self i could not understand how one person could not love their child,,i was with my boys dad for 12 years,,he gambled drank and was abusive,,yet i stayed thinkin he was their dad,,i grew up tho and left him. now i have this other man who i trusted sayin this to me??? i dont know what to do,,i try emailing him i get no response. calling his house hes never home..
all i do is cry
i have one good friend that knows everything,,
every one else i fake and pretend that i am happy and strong,,
but as soon as i am alone i cry
i had bleding this weekend and the doctors put me out on stress leave from work for 3 days,,
any one have any good things to say ?? i need positive!!
this is what i think every day,,,
i kno i have a baby comming,,(but i just started getting happy with work and bills,,)
i know i have this new baby comming,,(but how am i going to work and breast feed a infant,,and take care of two other kids on my own)
i know i have this new baby comming(but how can i rely on my friends and family when i dont have friends and familly to rely on??,,its just me..)
and who is going in the labor room with me...

Hi Andrea! I can completely relate to most of how you are feeling. It's not easy feeling betrayed. It's even harder thinking about how a child who doesn't have a father will feel. You just have to decide that you are strong enough. You can do this. You will make it. You made it this far with 2 boys. That right there says something for your bravery. I'm not going to tell you there is an easy way to do it, but you have to just decide to let yourself be happy every now and then. It's very easy to sink into dispair. It's much harder to push through and come out smiling. But it is a choice you can make. You can put on a smile. You can choose to only let the positive thoughts rest in your head. Take care of yourself and your babies. You can do it!

i want to give you positive and i will but to start i have to tell you to stop calling this guy he is not interested and you should not be interested in a guy who tells you he doesnt want you child to know hes the dad that is so freakin low i cant beleive it.. you will figure something out they say god doesnt give you more then you can handle im not saying it wont be hard i just have one and its hard , what about welfare for a while, i know its not much but you will be able to stay with the kids you just have to sacrafice a little, think about it, and eventually you can put the baby in daycare and go back to work, im in montreal we have this 5$ a day daycare service here, just be strong and forget about this loser leave him at his mothers where he belongs, and concentrate on yourself and the kids and thats it, i wish you the best

hi, im sorry to see youre going through these sad , uncertain feelings in a time where you should be so happy...i too have been in a situation where things were really good and then jekyl and hyde came to the surface and things went down hill...its sad because its never the babys fault and we must be strong to bring the babies into the world and take care and love them regardless these loser dads who left which really only makes them poor character sperm donors .. just stay strong and keep visualising a day when you will meet a man who will love you for who you are with all your children and keep saying to yourself when things are not going so well "this shall pass"... over and over and keep visualising what you want to happen, thats what i do.. i hope it works for you.. good luck and take care.. LISA FROM VA

I'm sorry that this has happened to you. I don't understand why its so often this way. But you did find the right place :welcome:
I have been thru a similar situation and my son and I are doing great. A lot of people here have been thru similar. You'll find supprt here.