Hello! I am new here. I am 27 & have a 4 year old son. How many of you financially struggle to make ends meet & how do you cope? I make too mcuh to get state help. However, daycare takes all but $100 of one of my checks. I get paid bi-weekly. With the other check & extra $100 I have to pay: rent, phone, insurance, car payment, electric, laundry, grovceries, supplies, gas, and anything else I am not thinking of. I cannot count on child support as it is not always there. I am so strapped & live each paycheck catching up from the last. This week my son got lice from another kid we know. Between the medicine and the laundry, I borrowed $80 from family. I know I need to pay them back but I also have other bills due. How does one make it?

I can't say I know exactly what you are going through, but I can tell you that I am in a simular situation where I am not getting finacial support from my childs father since november and my I was taking care of my father until he passed away in January from cancer....now I am almost out of money from my 401K investments. I am middle class and can not get help from the govenment. I am working hard to try every means of help that I can and from my research every little bit may help you....You may want to check with churches, programs that are food shelters (which help with food or sometimes bills like rent and electricity...the phone company as well as the electric company has programs to help out if you qualify....Wic...women and infant children( if you have that there) may be of help for milk, eggs, cereal, cheese and juice. There are programs that help with child care. I wish I could help you more since I know what you must be going through...It takes alot of phone calls and I need and am looking for women or men in my same situation who are single parents without support...If anyone knows of an organization...please email me...I am in Dallas Texas and need a break......good luck to you and I hope this little bit of information helped in one way or another....

I understand completely what you are going through. you just have to do what you have to do. I get payday loans I borrow . you just have to make sure you pay them back so you will be able to borrow again.I was thinking about getting another job but then that hole check will go to a babysitter. so I guess we're in the same situation. I just want to encourage you and let you know all your struggling will one day pay off. make ends meet the best way you know how.

You keep hussling! Needabreak gave such good ideas. wic is a good program if you can get it. If daddy's laxs on child support you can report that. Maybe think of getting one of those at home jobs. for extra income. I sell toys for more income. Plus I get to take Ethan along (if he's good and I have someone to watch him or something to keep him busy) Check it out if you don't like it, it's ok you can always just be in it to get FREE TOYS! CHECK IT OUT IT'S discovery toys. search for it... another thing to do is cut the expence. movies, games, clothes, start cut'n those coupons. When I was low on cash (pre-pregnancy) I would go to a church food drive(better bring a BIG BAG) those people get roudy! That's what I hate about the government is you better you self and don't qualify but you can't survive with what you make so you have to go back. I read this case where this woman was homeless then when she got a good job they gave her a raise but she made to much to get aid but couldn't pay for bills and such so she had to quit her job and go back on aid. HORRIBLE RIGHT? I t happens all the time. Good luck!

ps maybe you can ask you family if it would be possible to use their washer and dryer from time to time. You provide the soap but they provide the mashines.

I too am struggling here, i get under $310 a week and once i pay the rent i'm left with $160 to by food run a car, and pay bills.I did have a part time job but was put off due to new people comming on board on comission which i didnt want to do.Im not making ends meet i budget weekly which is fairly easy to do with limted money and i get no support form my ex or family.Right now i'm trying to sell my son's cot for money.So yeah your not the only one living week to week, hope things inprove in time for you.

Thanks for all of your responses!! It definatelyhelps knowing that there are others out there with the same issues. Most of the people I know are all married or getting married etc. The few single moms I knew had more supportive families than mine. They do help but usually there is a price tag attached or I have to get it paid back relatively quickly. I rarely ever go see movies, & if I go out it is usually because someone else is paying. I know that sounds bad but it is the only way. I own 1 pair of khakis & 2 pairs of jeans. I just don't have the money to buy a lot of clothes. We both need stuff for summer. Hmmm, wonder what bills I will put off for that?!

Hi, I can relate totally to your $ problems. Have you thought of contacting the department of social services in your area. Go in there and talk to a case worker, and he/she can tell you all the different programs there are. I know they have often daycare assistance- vouchers, wic which is great to provide formula or milk/juice if you have a toddler.. food stamps- which comes here in a form of a debit card, etc. Far as utilities you may also check places like united ministries, or your local community actions. I felt at first so ashamed to go to these people for help but that is what they are there for. In my situation my spouse left me wtih nothing hardley except back debts- and 2 small childern, so I had no choice but to go to these places and put my trash out (figure of speach) for people to see and ask for help. When you have children you will find a mom or dad will go to hell and back to guarentee their needs are meet. Good luck.

Two Stars-

Thanks for the information. Unfortunately I make too much they say. The one worker suggested I quit my job or take something with lower pay. If I do that I will never get off the system. What I don't understand is how I can be making too much when daycare takes 95% of one of my 2 week paychecks. I only have one 2 week paycheck to pay all the rest of the bills. If I get a second job most of it will be paying the babysitter. Plus I don't like to rob the time away from my son. There is not enough as is. The system stinks.

I like you all live from check to check, and couldn't afford daycare, so I sked my family for help and then found a few other single mother's that we traded daycare for one another and that saved a lot of money. I also became a coupon clipper, you could try applying for lieap they help with heat. taking your kids to free events like the zoo, park, museums,and baseball games, can be fun. I couldn't afford the movies,but my sons school sent home a pass for six dollars that will let him go to the movies, they are ones that have been out for awhile like scoobydoo, but they enjoy the expierence and not care so much about the movie. we also have a theatre that has three dollar admissions. Garage sales, second hand stores, outlet stores and sewing are neat ways to get clothes and furniture. My daughter enjoyed picking out the patterns and material for her clothes and it saves a money, I got the lace from garage sale curtians, table cloths and got a lot of compliments on the dresses, kids are big on labels, so I sewed it onto the dress and no one knew the diffrence. They could never buy one, so it was unique. Get a hair cut and any car repairs done at a trade school, they need the practice to graduate and it's very cheap!! Thejob I used to have was a center for the handicap it provided jobs for the handicap that can't work in regular jobs, they provide house cleaning, washing and cleaning your car and second hand stores for cheap and they do a great job! For medical try the Kid Care program, you still pay a little but not like reg. Insurance. flea markets are good source too. Good Luck

quote:

Originally posted by twostars:
[qb] Hi, I can relate totally to your $ problems. Have you thought of contacting the department of social services in your area. Go in there and talk to a case worker, and he/she can tell you all the different programs there are. I know they have often daycare assistance- vouchers, wic which is great to provide formula or milk/juice if you have a toddler.. food stamps- which comes here in a form of a debit card, etc. Far as utilities you may also check places like united ministries, or your local community actions. I felt at first so ashamed to go to these people for help but that is what they are there for. In my situation my spouse left me wtih nothing hardley except back debts- and 2 small childern, so I had no choice but to go to these places and put my trash out (figure of speach) for people to see and ask for help. When you have children you will find a mom or dad will go to hell and back to guarentee their needs are meet. Good luck. [/qb]

I know this is way late but I am new to this site and came upon these posts. I can so relate to your situation. My ex left me with a huge amount of debt. When I found out that my ex was leaving I first was frightened to death but then I sat down and thought about my kids and do what I needed to do. I contacted our local housing authority and am on a few lists for housing (which the list can take up to 5 yrs because of the budget cuts). I contacted my phone and electric company. They give discounts on low-income families. I joined cosumer credit counciling and my bills will be paid off in January. I made a deal with my landlord to give him a couple of extra bucks a month to pay down my back rent. It is still cheaper to stay here and pay extra than to move right now. I contacted my local community action council and applied for LHEP (fuel assistance) they even pay for your heat expense even if it included in your rent. They also have other programs that are not advertised but you need to swallow your pride and call.This year has been rough because my ex can not seem to hold a job so I receive support sometimes. This year I even had to swallow my pride and except holiday help. There is alot of help out there and it does take quite a few phone calls. If they tell you there is a waiting list have your name placed on it. You never know when they may call your name. When I applied for daycare assistance there was a list and I told them to add my name within a few months it was my turn and I thought it would take a long time. Thank God for that assistance but like I said there is so many programs just takes some digging around and phone calls.
Good lUck

You are definitely not alone, as you can tell from the responses here!

Check with your church, call the United Way, I even spoke to one of the counselor's at my daughters school, and they put me on a list that provides extra food for the holidays, and when you go to the church to pick up the food, they have these "free" rooms -- we were able to pick up some extra clothes for the girls, and they were (and still are!) in good condition.

Call the Department of Human Resources, and even though they may say no for certain assistance (believe me, I know first hand how difficult it can be), keep after them for ANY suggestions if you are not eligible for food stamps, housing, daycare and the like -- and if you are eligible, there is no shame in taking whatever help you can get at this point. If you have to get on any waiting lists, put yourself on it, because you may as well be on it, as opposed to not, you know?!

Believe me, I am 44, with a 7 and 8 year old and had to start over from scratch (no $$ support from the ex, but his wages are attached, SHOULD he work anywhere...legally that is!), and while it has been difficult, we are "eking" by, bit by bit.

As everyone here has noted, it takes some digging around, lots of phone calls, but most of all, belief in yourself (you CAN do it! ) AND, the fact that you have emotional support here, is a great start!

Keep us posted as to your progress!

Sorry for the double post!

Kind of new here myself, and still trying to make sure I do everything correctly (and some days, it just doesn't happen! LOL!)

Hi stepahnieanne, Wanted to welcome you to the site, I took care of the double post so no worries. Enjoy the site and it's wonderful members.