My daughter and I were seperated from my husband/her father in May of 1997,divorced in November of 2000, and then he passed away suddenly in June of 2001. During our seperation, I was very depressed. Living with my parents in my late 30's, I could bearly get myself out of bed for work. If I did not have to work, I would pretty much stay in my P.J.'s all day. It was an ongoing joke when my parents friend would come over. I really did not realize that this was actually a form of clinical depression I was going through until he passed away, and then I lost it and went to the doctor. I am now on Paxil, and it has helped. My daughter and I moved out of my parents house and we are trying to move on. My problem is, I do not know who I am anymore. I use to be very athletic love to bike, walk, but now I seem to have a mental block to do any of these things. I am still finding it difficult to get motivated and wonder, what happened to me over the years and how do I get some of that person back.

Linda,

I am glad that you are coping with everything a little better & I am sorry you had to go through everything you did, but everything happens for a reason.

Life is all about choices and you can either choose to let what ever this is your going through take over your life or you can move past it and start living. I would hope that you for your sake and your daughters would choose to move past it. Life does suck sometimes and it does suck to deal with all of the crap we have to deal with as single parents, but you know what they say, "God only gives us what he knows we can handle". Life is all about how we percieve it & right now it seems you are letting all of the negatives get you down. What you need to do is say to hell with all the negative I want to start living for the positives! "If you want to feel rich, count all of the things that you have that money can't buy". Life is too short for you to waste it away. We don't know how long we have on this earth & wouldn't you rather do what it takes to clear away all of the downs and start living! Take it day by day, or hour by hour & say to yourself or keep a journal on one good thing you have in your life and one negative thing that you want to completely leave behind forever. Find something positive, even if it is a real small thing and focus on that for the day or the week and slowly you will start to feel better. Change your outlook on your life! Our life is what we make of it! Think positive and eventually positive things will happen for you. If you can't find it in yourself to do this just for you do it for your daughter. She deserves to have a happy, positive, mom that has a good outlook on life. We have to set good examples for our children. They do learn from us, whether it be good or bad. You don't want her to think that this is all there is to life. I hope my honesty does not offend you in any way. It is just I have been in your shoes for so many years and I hate to see others suffer. Please take care of yourself and I am here if you need to talk.