Hi all. This is my first day on here as I have just found this site. So I guess I'll start with the fact that I have just turned 26 and am the single mom of a beautiful 10 month old. But my problem lies with her father. Why must men run away from their problems instead of confronting them head on? Why must they turn to other things such as another woman or alcohol or drugs? I just don't get it. Well, my life is a disaster. I cannot seem to figure out how I am going to move out of my parents house (yes, I do live with them for now) in october, plus go to school full time for the nursing program, deal with my daughter, work, and have my friends lives keep getting better and better while mine sinks even deeper.
I am just so frustrated because my friends have found the perfect person for them who also loves their kids and I sit home alone every night after my daughter goes to bed and feel like crying and hitting things. It is so depressing to think that I am only 26 and my life feels like it is over. I want to finish school so badly so that maybe things can get a little better, but it is so hard. I love school, I love my daughter. But both don't seem to be fitting together. Why do I feel so badly? Why must life feel like quick sand. My ex-husband enjoys causing problems in my life, my daughters father enjoys making my life a living hell, my parents are getting on my case because I can't move out until at least october because of my finances. After all, I don't get a penny of child support, nor do I allow him to baby sit. I am so afraid that he is going to run off with her. After all, he has threatened it.
I want to talk to my friends about my problems, but whenever we talk all they seem to talk about is what they talked about with their new significant other, what they did together, the vacation they are planning together, yada yada yada. It just makes me even more depressed to listen to it. Then to top it all off, my exes family is causing problems in my life by telling me that I am a bad mom because I won't take my daughter to the jail to visit her father. And I won't drive for 4 hours with a 10 month old so that they can see her.
I am just so frustrated and stress that I feel like crying when I do anything. The only thing that can seem to make me smile is my beautiful baby girl. And even then I get frustrated with her at times too. And that makes me feel like a rotten mother to her. I just need help. I don't know where to turn, who to talk to, and where to get help. I am even rambling in here because I am so stressed out. I just want to be a good mom to my daughter, but how can I do that if I feel so awful?!

You sure do have a lot going on! How much more schooling do you have to do? First of all you need to make sure you are taking care of yourself-sleep and food. Are your parents supportive? You said they are getting on your case about moving out? Seems like everything is being put on you. I don't think I would take my child to see her father in prison. If the grandparents want to see her, they can come down and see her probably easier than you going up there. I really am not a drug rep and do not have stock in any companies, but have you considered taking any medication. It can make you feel better and maybe able to see things clearer. It willnot take away your difficulties, but will help you be able to deal with them a little better.

Hi Sb and welcome.
Keep you chin up dear. You just found a whole lot of support. One day at a time.
Could you meat half way with the grandparents? If they really want to see the baby and for Daddy to they can do some foot work too.
When I start getting bored I find myself some good non-fiction books. Gets the brain going again. Really helpful for me.
Lots of prayers. This to shall pass and all will be good again.