I am a single parent, in a Marriage & Family class and I am doing a project on single parenting. All responses to my POLL will be greatly appreciated!

1. How long have you been a single parent?

2. How did you become a single parent (never married, divorced, widowed)?

3. Do you have joint custody?

4. What is your religious affiliation / denomination?

5. Do you feel supported by society (explain)?

6. Do you receive financial assistance from (government, family, church, other, none)?

7. Do you receive emotional support from (government, family, church, other, none)?

8. What are your living arrangements (home/apartment, rent/own)?

9. Given you experience as a single parent, if you could rewind time, would you single parent again (explain)?

10. Do you feel your children are affected or not by being raised in a single parent household (explain)?

Additional comments?

Thank you for your responses!

Marie

My disclaimer: Since I have 3 girls from three different relationships over the years to keep this simpler I'll answer for my youngest daughter.

1.12 years

2.Not married

3.Full custody

4.Spiritual though raised as Catholic

5.Yes, I think that society is pretty used to (unfortunately) single parents raising children, and becoming more accustomed as well to them being raised by single dads.

6.No assistance

7.Yes, emotional support from my family, and this site

8.Homeowner

9.I always believe that we just shouldn't worry about "rewinding" to change anything. We are who we are by way of where we've been and what we've done. That's not to say that I'm proud of everything from my past, but it is all what has brought me to where I am today, and very much a part of what I pull from in deciding how to raise my daughter.

10.........Okay as I see it, considering I've just typed and retyped this answer too many times depending on which way I looked at it. I just don't think that "being raised by a single parent has had an affect". I think that any real affects on raising children still come down to the individuals as parents and what they are about, more than whether they were together or single. Don't know how else to answer that.

1. How long have you been a single parent? 6 years

2. How did you become a single parent (never married, divorced, widowed)? (never married)Bad judgement and really low self esteem.

3. Do you have joint custody? No.

4. What is your religious affiliation / denomination? Inter-Denominational Christian

5. Do you feel supported by society (explain)? i do feel supported by what you can call my sphere of influence (those who I know directly) But I also feel like society as demonstrated by the media and the judicial system does not support single parents.

6. Do you receive financial assistance from (government, family, church, other, none)? some, insurance for my children but that is it.

7. Do you receive emotional support from (government, family, church, other, none)? Family, friends and church definitely.

8. What are your living arrangements (home/apartment, rent/own)? I live with my mother.

9. Given you experience as a single parent, if you could rewind time, would you single parent again (explain)? If I could have the same kids by someone else sure, if I could not have the same kids I would do the single parent route without hesitation.

10. Do you feel your children are affected or not by being raised in a single parent household (explain)? Of coarse children are affected, what child is not affected by the home they are raised in?

Additional comments?

Thank you for your responses!

Marie [/QB][/QUOTE]

1. How long have you been a single parent? - 5 years

2. How did you become a single parent (never married, divorced, widowed)? - I'm with Pita on this one

3. Do you have joint custody? - She's all mine, he's never been there.

4. What is your religious affiliation / denomination? - Christian, I love Jesus

5. Do you feel supported by society (explain)? - I feel supported by my close proximity of friends and of course family. I have had some people at church look down upon me, but that never harmed me. I know where my heart is.

6. Do you receive financial assistance from (government, family, church, other, none)? - I've done everything on my own. Hard work and a lot of sweat!

7. Do you receive emotional support from (government, family, church, other, none)? - Refer to question #5

8. What are your living arrangements (home/apartment, rent/own)? - Homeowner

9. Given you experience as a single parent, if you could rewind time, would you single parent again (explain)? - My daughter of course is not a mistake. I'm not one to dwell on that past. I look at what's ahead and plan accordingly.

10. Do you feel your children are affected or not by being raised in a single parent household (explain)? - I'm just now getting to that point with my daughter. She came home the other day and said; "Mommy, my friends at school talk about thier daddy, will I ever have a daddy"? She stumped me on that one.

These are some very serious questions. I liked your poll.

Hi...you sure catch on fast...here's mine;


1. How long have you been a single parent?11 years

2. How did you become a single parent (never married, divorced, widowed)? never married(common law)

3. Do you have joint custody? yes

4. What is your religious affiliation / denomination? Daughter is Roman Cath. I'm lutheran (non-practising)

5. Do you feel supported by society (explain)? Not really...as a single male I feel I am expected to support society...no breaks for the working guy

6. Do you receive financial assistance from (government, family, church, other, none)? nada

7. Do you receive emotional support from (government, family, church, other, none)? Friends and the great people here at SFV.
8. What are your living arrangements (home/apartment, rent/own)? rent apartment
9. Given you experience as a single parent, if you could rewind time, would you single parent again (explain)? It wasn't a choicebut I would try to do some things differently.

10. Do you feel your children are affected or not by being raised in a single parent household (explain)? No...I have worked very hard to avoid that in her life. I'm proud to say my girl is self-confident, caring and respectful and completely accustomed to our lifestyle.

1. How long have you been a single parent?
Sept 13, 1999 (mother left)

2. How did you become a single parent (never married, divorced, widowed)?
October, 2000 (divorced)

3. Do you have joint custody?
I have sole physical custody (he lives with me) and joint legal custody (she has input to how he's raised).

4. What is your religious affiliation / denomination?
I was born, raised, and married Catholic. Seven years of engineering school has made me only have faith in things that can be proven through repeatable experiments; now I'm agnostic bordering on atheist.

5. Do you feel supported by society (explain)?
Sociey is a pretty big group. Many people assume my son's just visiting me when we're together. Many people assume I'm a bad parent, probably due to my age; it's not uncommon for strangers to give my son orders right in front of me. Some people that know I'm custodial act like I'm doing penance for all of the bad fathers out there, although most seem to give me a pat on the back. 19 out of 20 woman on Internet dating sites list "no kids" for the guys they're looking to date, and I wish some of the hot ones would at least give me a shot on their off night. I wish that some of the people that go out and have active social lives would call me up and invite me along once and awhile.

6. Do you receive financial assistance from (government, family, church, other, none)?
When my son was first born, we had state health insurance, WIC, and we lived in a government housing complex. I've received lots of federal student grants and loans. We don't get any assistance now.

7. Do you receive emotional support from (government, family, church, other, none)?
I get significant support from Anheuser-Busch.

8. What are your living arrangements (home/apartment, rent/own)?
I own a two family home. We live in the upstairs apartment and rent the downstairs apartment.

9. Given you experience as a single parent, if you could rewind time, would you single parent again (explain)?
This is a complicated question. Would I stop my son from being born? Now that I know him and love him I couldn't possibly say yes, no matter how difficult it made my life. If I could rewind time and stop his mom from leaving, I most certainly would. Of those two tasks, however, time travel is probably the most realistic. My son's mother is a beautiful, funny, and really cool girl, but she is also self-centered and miserable being a wife/mother.

If someone else went back in time and told me that I was about to conceive a baby the day it happened, I definitely wouldn't have done it.

10. Do you feel your children are affected or not by being raised in a single parent household (explain)?
It kills me that my son is being raised in a single parent household. He is such a perfect little kid who's now paying for the mistakes of his parents. He gets so happy when he sees his mother; he used to see her every day.

All of those Christmas mornings where he had to make a phone call to celebrate with both of his parents...

All of the time he has spent in daycare and with babysitters...

All of the time that he has spent entertaining himself because I had housework that needed to be done...

All of the afterschool activities that he couldn't do because it wasn't possible to fit it into one parents schedule...

I could list ways he has been cheated in his childhood forever...

He certainly has been affected by being raised in a single parent household and it sucks because he's the only one that didn't do anything wrong.

Additional comments?
Sorry this was long...see answer #7...

1. How long have you been a single parent?

December, 2002.

2. How did you become a single parent (never married, divorced, widowed)?
Seperated, then divorced, was abused by my ex, got rid of him when he went after our daughters.

3. Do you have joint custody?

I have full legal and physical custody.

4. What is your religious affiliation / denomination?

Non-denominational Christian

5. Do you feel supported by society (explain)?

That is a difficult one...in all "totality" I do feel "excluded" and judged by others who are not single parents, and the weird part of it is, is that while I know there are so many of us (single parents), it seems that I have not been able to find any, or local support groups in my area, except in the way of this board!

6. Do you receive financial assistance from (government, family, church, other, none)?

Yes, regardless of the fact that I am working full-time, we are just scraping by. I am eligable and thankful for the assistance I receive...minimum food-stamps, medicaid and assistance with child-care. The day will come when I will be able to do this completely on my own, but there is no shame in the aid we are receiving now.

7. Do you receive emotional support from (government, family, church, other, none)?

Some family members are emotionally there, the church we attend is great, and of course, this board has been a great source of emotional support!

8. What are your living arrangements (home/apartment, rent/own)?

I am renting a 2 bedroom apartment for my daughters and I.

9. Given you experience as a single parent, if you could rewind time, would you single parent again (explain)?

I would not rewind time, what happened, happened, and I prefer to move on and learn from my mistakes, and try to help others before they get there (to a situation similar to mine), and let them know (in the case of abuse) that it is okay to walk, and that there is help, one just needs a guiding hand.

10. Do you feel your children are affected or not by being raised in a single parent household (explain)?

Absolutely...I could write an essay on the matter, but in a nutshell, society, even today, seems to frown upon single-parents, regardless of the reason we ARE single parents, and of course, the children are affected...my one daughter also came home the other day, in tears, because a class-mate teased her about not having a "daddy" and she to asked me, if she will ever have a daddy again. Broke my heart, but I told her that she does have a daddy, it is just that he has some "problems" he must work through (drug/alcohol/abuse, of which, he refuses to get help for) at this time, and to try and not let "words" from others who do not know our situation, get her down.

Additional comments?

quote:

He certainly has been affected by being raised in a single parent household and it sucks because he's the only one that didn't do anything wrong.

I believe BigBobby said it best in his comment above!