Wow Chris!

Before my son was born my life was not one to relive ever again, I was pretty heavy into drugs and alcohol,I would do almost anything as long as it did not involve needles ( but the way I was going it probably would have gotten to that point) the day I found out I was pregnant I threw away everything, I quit drugs that day, I was very hard, I went through some pretty bad withdraws, but at 5'6 and 105 pounds my body was wasting away and I had a little inocent sould growing inside me..I was so scared for 9 months that my addiction and stupidity would harm my baby, even though i quit the day i found out all that **** was still in my body...when he was born he was perfect and still is, nothing is wrong and I thank God everyday for letting him be so perfect. I have been clean now for 8 yrs. If it were not for my son I do not know if I would be alive today, but now clean and sober he is my life..it is hard being a single mom but I would not change anything..so alot of my poetry was written in the days i was using and alot are very deap, demented, but it is life, it is how I was, I will share some of those if you guys would like, it shows the mind of someone who is on so many different drugs, that life is scary, one I wish on no-one
Mandy

This isn't mine but it has meaning to me so I thought I would share it:

Better Together

There is no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard
And no song that I could sing but I can try for your heart
And our dreams and they are made out of real things
Like a shoebox of photographs with sepia-toned loving
Love is the answer at least for most of the questions in my heart
Like why are we here? And where do we go? And how come it�s so hard?
It�s not always easy and sometimes life can be deceiving
I�ll tell you one thing, it�s always better when we�re together

We�ll look at the stars when we�re together

And all of these moments just might find their way into my dreams tonight
But I know that they�ll be gone when the morning light sings
Or brings new things for tomorrow night you see
That they�ll be gone too, too many things I have to do
But if all of these dreams might find their way into my day to day scene
I�d be under the impression I was somewhere in between
With only two, just me and you, not so many things we got to do
Or places we got to be we�ll sit beneath the mango tree now

It�s always better when we�re together
We�re somewhere in between together

I believe in memories they look so pretty when I sleep
And when I wake up you look so pretty sleeping next to me
But there is not enough time
And there is no song I could sing
And there is no combination of words I could say
But I will still tell you one thing
We�re better together

This is a story I started to write last winter about a morning at my house. Hope you guys enjoy it. If I get my paper done this week maybe I'll work on it somemore.

The other day I started thinking about how much more fun life was when I was younger, and I wondered (outloud to my coworkers dismay) was it really an age thing or maybe it was just a mind set. So I decided to watch my children and do the same things that they do and see if life wouldn't be just a little bit more fun(I mean it couldn't get worse right).
So this morning I got up and as usual I got Dolan out of bed and I followed him down the hallway to the stairs. When we got to the steps Dolan droped to his but and proceeded to slid down the steps on his backside. He seemed to enjoy this very much so rather than yell at him and tell him (as I had been want to do, and had so frequently done in the past) to walk down the steps like a big boy, I droped on my butt and attempted to slide down the stairs after him. Not taking into consideration that Dolan isn't much over 2 feet tall and I am just under 6 foot tall, I hadn't thought about the distance that I would be dropping to the ground. I realize now that I also didn't take into account the effect that gravity would have on my 195 lbs versus his 35lbs. As I crashed to the (very hard) floor, with a bang that shook the house, I let out a yelp (which if the bang hadn't awoken everyone else surely my yelp had). I decided that even though it hurt I might as well proceed with the plan as I was already down there and standing at this point would be way to much effort. So I started down the steps on my bottom the first one was kinda fun but on the second one I realized I hadn't thought this through very well (it being 5:30 in the morning I excused myself this minor mistake), as there are only 4 steps until the landing and I would have to get up. Just then Dolan giggled and said come on dad, hurry up and he scootted around the landing to the top of the next step on his behind. I decided to follow (again thinking it has got to be easier than getting up). So as he started down the next flight of stairs I was right behind him and rearing to go (well anyway as rearing as one can be this early). Have I mentioned yet how all of this may have been a bad idea? When Dolan got to the bottom he headed for the Kitchen and his usual breakfast of a Poptart and some O.J., when I got to the bottom, (which by the way is vinyl not carpet) I didn't even consider my speed or the fact that I had socks on (which are very slippery on fresshly waxed vinyl), I just tried to stand up and start following the little guy. Needless to say BIG mistake, I had no traction and when I tried to catch myself I went head first into the wooden clothes drying rack Tami had set up in the office the day before.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Song By Kelly Clarkson
Because Of You

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break, the way you did, you fell so hard
I�ve learned the hard way to never let it get that far
Because of you I never strayed to far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don�t get hurt
Because of you I find it hard to find it hard to trust, not only me,
but everyone around me, Because of you, I am afraid
I lose my way, and its not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry, because I know that�s weakness in your eyes
I�m forced to fake a smile, a laugh, every day of my life
My heart can�t possibly break, when it wasn�t even whole to start with
I watched you die, I heard you cry, every night in your sleep.
I was so young, you should have known better than to lean on me.
You never thought of anyone else you just saw your pain.
And now I cry in the middle of the night, doin the same damn thing
Because of you I never strayed to far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don�t get hurt
Because of you I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you I don�t know how to let anyone else in
Because of you I�m ashamed of my life, because its empty
Because of you, I am afraid

Ok, I am told I should put this here, it not much, but it came from my heart, going out to someone who was waiting for a child.

Not even the moon has the beauty of this face. The love, the new-ness of the presence in this place. The glow of the mom, and the innocence of this child, makes me weep for a world gone wild. So all I can do is wish peace and hope and love, as this maybe the one who changes the world for love.

Dalilamakarma,

That is an awesome poem!

I am new here at SFV, I am finding my way around the site...it feels good to know that there is so much support here that everyone gives each other.

I also couldn't resist to share one of my poems. May you all be blessed!

Awakened

Written by Maribel Camacho

Spirit awakened, yesterday she slept.
Became a zombie, unconsciously she kept.
She lived in patterns, existing with strife.
Under a spell she was, most of her life.

Not having awareness of her higher self;
She continued in cycles, confused with herself.
She walked into a labyrinth, got lost in the maze.
She paced in circles, fell in a daze.

Had no inspiration, stayed in conformity,
Without direction, headed to uncertainty.
In her comfort zone, she silently wept.
In denial she continued, she couldn't accept.

That staying in the marriage for so long
Wasn't getting her stronger, felt something was wrong.
She chose to leave and made a discovery
If she would've stayed wouldn't made a full recovery.

She's awakened today, not living in a trance.
Refusing to repeat, the same song and dance.

August 5, 2006

Wow, I didn't realize that there was a poetry post....I will have to post some of my stuff in here sometime...and start writing new ones also.

Here's one that I think I already posted here sometime back, but it is my favorite....It is titled......

The Last Goodbye

You said that you loved me,
And asked if I do,
I said that I loved you,
Who swore their love true?

I now sit here weeping,
Feeling constantly ill,
You're out having fun,
You live for the thrill.

I take a look back,
I just can't understand,
Why you tried your luck,
With a sure thing in your hand.

You said you weren't happy,
Claimed you had to leave,
I sat there and watched,
I just couldn't believe.

The pain I must live with,
Due to this affair,
Has left my heart tattered,
Beaten and bare.

I used to have hope,
That you would return,
What was once known as hope,
Has turned into concern.

My dreams they lie shattered,
Not sure what to do,
My dreams they lie shattered,
Shattered by you.

I finally can see,
It wasn't my fault,
You just had no desire,
Of being an adult.

So now I must go,
For I truly see,
The love that you had,
It wasn't for me.

You gave it away,
Without a second thought,
So much for the morals,
Your parents had taught.

It no longer matters,
For now I must go,
Away from your heart,
That's as cold as the snow.

Someday you will understand,
Some day you will see,
The best thing you ever had,
You had it in me.

Until that day comes,
You will struggle to find,
A love that compares,
To the power of mine.

I wish you the best,
For I have no shame,
I was merely a pawn,
A pawn in your game.

So now I must walk away,
With my head held high.
For this is the last time,
You will hear this.......

goodbye.

quote:

Originally posted by Trey's Daddy:
Here's one that I think I already posted here sometime back, but it is my favorite....It is titled......

The Last Goodbye

You said that you loved me,
And asked if I do,
I said that I loved you,
Who swore their love true?

I now sit here weeping,
Feeling constantly ill,
You're out having fun,
You live for the thrill.

I take a look back,
I just can't understand,
Why you tried your luck,
With a sure thing in your hand.

You said you weren't happy,
Claimed you had to leave,
I sat there and watched,
I just couldn't believe.

The pain I must live with,
Due to this affair,
Has left my heart tattered,
Beaten and bare.

I used to have hope,
That you would return,
What was once known as hope,
Has turned into concern.

My dreams they lie shattered,
Not sure what to do,
My dreams they lie shattered,
Shattered by you.

I finally can see,
It wasn't my fault,
You just had no desire,
Of being an adult.

So now I must go,
For I truly see,
The love that you had,
It wasn't for me.

You gave it away,
Without a second thought,
So much for the morals,
Your parents had taught.

It no longer matters,
For now I must go,
Away from your heart,
That's as cold as the snow.

Someday you will understand,
Some day you will see,
The best thing you ever had,
You had it in me.

Until that day comes,
You will struggle to find,
A love that compares,
To the power of mine.

I wish you the best,
For I have no shame,
I was merely a pawn,
A pawn in your game.

So now I must walk away,
With my head held high.
For this is the last time,
You will hear this.......

goodbye.

Trey's Daddy,

Hello, I am new here at SFV. I enjoyed very much reading the poem you posted. Thought I tell you I love poetry and am learning to write it. Thank you.

Oh, by the way you have adorable looking boys.

quote:

Originally posted by Maribel:
Oh, by the way you have adorable looking boys.

I only have Trey...the other is me I look EXTREMELY young, I know....I am infact 28

Here is another one for ya.....titled:

Can Never Be.....

Sitting here thinking,
Wondering why,
You were so harsh,
When you said goodbye,

I always loved you,
I always cared,
Maybe you ran,
Because you got scared,

So many memories,
I sit down and ponder,
Trying to make sense,
My love you did squander,

You took me for granted,
I've realized this true,
You then walked away,
You said we were through.

I can see in your eyes,
Your heart's full of pain,
You've made a mistake,
But still you remain,

Alone in your castle,
You sit and you wait,
You're too blind to see,
That you've sealed your own fate,

You left the one person,
Who swore to you true,
You walked out on everyone,
Who truly loved you,

You now sit there empty,
Feeling lost and alone,
How will you survive,
The cold world on your own,

You once had a future,
You once had a dream,
Now it's all gone,
How obscure does it seem,

One ill advised move,
You didn't conceive,
You thought you were right,
You still can't believe,

Walking away from everything,
Thinking you already knew,
Your new love was wonderful,
He cared about you,

Now you feel empty,
Alone and ashamed,
There's only one person,
Who can truly be blamed,

You had your reasons,
You had to be free,
I have my reasons,
We can never be we.

quote:

Originally posted by Trey's Daddy:

quote:

Originally posted by Maribel:
Oh, by the way you have adorable looking boys.

I only have Trey...the other is me I look EXTREMELY young, I know....I am infact 28

Here is another one for ya.....titled:

Can Never Be.....

Sitting here thinking,
Wondering why,
You were so harsh,
When you said goodbye,

I always loved you,
I always cared,
Maybe you ran,
Because you got scared,

So many memories,
I sit down and ponder,
Trying to make sense,
My love you did squander,

You took me for granted,
I've realized this true,
You then walked away,
You said we were through.

I can see in your eyes,
Your heart's full of pain,
You've made a mistake,
But still you remain,

Alone in your castle,
You sit and you wait,
You're too blind to see,
That you've sealed your own fate,

You left the one person,
Who swore to you true,
You walked out on everyone,
Who truly loved you,

You now sit there empty,
Feeling lost and alone,
How will you survive,
The cold world on your own,

You once had a future,
You once had a dream,
Now it's all gone,
How obscure does it seem,

One ill advised move,
You didn't conceive,
You thought you were right,
You still can't believe,

Walking away from everything,
Thinking you already knew,
Your new love was wonderful,
He cared about you,

Now you feel empty,
Alone and ashamed,
There's only one person,
Who can truly be blamed,

You had your reasons,
You had to be free,
I have my reasons,
We can never be we.

Did you write this one?

Yes, I wrote them both...

quote:

Originally posted by Trey's Daddy:
Yes, I wrote them both...

Great poems! I created a portfolio online on another website to get reviews and learn more about poetry.