I do one on one work at the local elementary school in town and I was working with a boy yesterday that was a drug baby and had ADHD and they are doing testing to find out whatelse is wrong. But he is a verry special quiet boy. But most of the kids in the group have low selfesteems. We were going an exercise where they write the name that they get called the most and we start a bon fire and burn them up. Well he is in kindergarden and he wrote "I dont know why God gave me a F**cken retard for a son. Your F**cken stupid go away". Now I know that kids lie but he has never lied before and I have working with him for 2 years. I know that his parents are alcoholics and I have notified the proper athorities but there is no Child Services in my small town. But to watch this little boy cry as he threw his paper into the fire and to say do you think that God will take it away like he did the paper? I dont know how to show him love and not over step my boundries as an aid. Does anyone have a suggestion on what todo to help him. I cant give anymore details because of the law but I feel the need todo something.

That is just awful! You said that you have notified the authorities...what do they say? Can you talk to the school administration about this? I am pretty sure that by law they would have to get more involved in the situation....

They should at least send someone from the nearest CPS office, just because there isn't one in town doesn't mean they don't have that responsibility.

That's what I was thinking. We live in BFE out in the sticks and they send people over all the time when there is a situation.

Taylor's Mommy...I can imagine how your feeling and how your heart pours out for this child. It is a terrible thing to be in a situation of uncertainty. If you have enough evidence through drawings etc...too bad the exercise was thrown into the fire because that would have been evidence...but I understand from a therapeutic perspective why it was done...you didn't mention how old the child is. I am assuming by his language you said he used, he is between 8-12. If your not sure that it will be a positive outcome for the child, my advice is to keep working with the child as closely as possible. I was in a similar situation both as an adult and as a child. As an adult working in group homes and coaching young children through my motivational program, I saw alot. As a child I experienced what he went through...and when someone did get involved , Children's Aid did not remove me from teh situation so you can imagine how when they stuck their nose in it, the **** I went through after they decided not to do anything about it, I had to stay in similar living conditions if not worse because of course "it was my fault, and I apparently imagined everything". That unfortunately scarred me because from a very early age, I made as a result the assumption that adults could not be trusted, so I refused to talk, or express my feelings and emotions for years. Do your research well knowing what the outcome will be. With alcoholics, everythign is a secret and they do not like their personal lives exposed...with alcoholics the "victim" in this case the child is blamed for many things including his own existance. I don't know the laws in your state, but here if there is enough evidence there is through CAS, intervention by removing the child based on the child's words and psychology assessments and the parents must seek counselling. Based on good behaviour they usually end up back with teh child. You can also go through another approach depending how well you know his parents which is to see what kind of help they need in terms of working with their child. Obviously the child is receiving alot of negative criticism that I would consider abusive and very damaging.
My answer to the child's question if God will remove it? Yes....God will remove it...how...get the child praying for what he would like. Perhaps create a workbook and title it "conversations with God", and have him write letters to God telling God how he feels...this is tricky because you don't want to create sudden changes in the child's life by unexpected results such as an immediate removal. Their is also the other side that even though the child is not happy at home, he still loves his parents so if removal of the child from his home is the option which may sound like it, hopefully they do it with tact.In the meantime however, write him little notes of how brite and intelligent he is...how loved he really is because it is the truth. Give him lots of loving messages in little notes. Something he will always remember because one day in his life when he looks back, those little encouraging notes may be one day his life savior because those messages will be stored in his subconsious mind and he will remember them.
I would strongly consider giving him therapeutic activities where his mind is engaged only in the positive things he has in life. This is very important so that he does not fall through the cracks of the system and he will value his life enough to reach out for the stars.

I like the book about God. But he is in Kindergarded so most of the words that he wrote were not spelled correctly. The nearst CPS office is a 2 hour plane ride away and unless the kids in the hospital they dont come. I did use my connection at the police station and informed the principal personaly about it. I saw his dad after school and he was telling him about the exersice and his dad wanted him to tell him what he wrote. We told the kids that they didnt have to tell anyone even us what they wrote on the paper. The only reason I know what he wrote was because he did know how to spell f*ck. It was just bad. The dad was getting mad and just calmly asked him if there was a problem. He said nothing that he cant handle and walked the boy out the front door. I just cant imagine treating a dog like that let alone a child! Some people are just sick.

I really don't think you can over-step your boundaries with this little guy because he's in such desperate need for affection. Screw the "boundaries" and give him all the love and attention you can afford to give him because he's not going to get it anywhere else. Everybody needs a hero in their lives and here's your chance to be that hero. Take it.

Taylor's mommy...

I took a course in therapeutic art therapy, which includes art, storytelling therapy,dance therapy and even though he is in kindergarten, even if he can't spell...he does know what he draws, or writes even though you cannot read it. It would really be for the child to do. A therapist is able to draw out those feelings from what he expresses on paper irregardless if he does not know how to spell. Obviously if he used a sentence like the one you described, he is capable of expression in many ways and my belief is that it would benefit him. These are things you can take to Children's Aid or the child's psychologist.

Now, what could also happen, if it is not done with tact, right timing with a determined outcome, is if the parents gets whif of what is going on, he may just yank his son out of the school all together and you may never see that child.

This is very unfortunate but happens very frequently when parents cannot face their wrong doings.
They just yank the child out and move sometimes out of the country or into another state or province. You wouldn't want that to happen because you obviously developed a relationship with the child, and i know it would break your heart to lose site of him forever. Just if your doing something, make sure you have the parents by the balls in order to determine the outcome with most certainty.

Miranda