I have four children who were sexually abused by thier father. When I found out what was happening, we fled. He is serving a hefty sentance, "paying" for his crimes. Our life has become a not-so-merry-go-round of therapists, residential treatment facilities for my oldest son, and trying to survive with 5 children on my own. Three children have PTSD, the same trauma induced disorder that many war Vets suffer from. Therapist after therapist have confirmed that what they need most, is thier mom. The State feels differently. We recieve $675 a month (to pay all the bills, clothing, housing, exc.) and in order to keep that, I MUST go and work out side the home, and let someone else take care of my kids. Here is the kicker... they will pay that some one else MORE to watch my children while I work them I am given to care for them. Please, does any of this make sense??? Is it now socially unexceptable to be a mom? Am I asking to be a couch potato? hmm... let's see...5 kids, 3 with disabilities...yeah sure, of course. In the old Soviet Socialist Republic (Russia) one of the great bits of propaganda supporting the cold war was the horible way families were delt with. The parents were forced to work while government approved centers cared for the kids. Ouch, that's starting to sound a little close to home. Are we looking for a free ride? If your are in my shoes, or can imagine being there, can you imagine any more difficult job? Your opinions please, I need to know if my logic and reasoning is that far out .... Thanks!

Well, it�s the first time I hear anything like this. I wish it was like that where I live. I was actually unable to go work, because that would have cut all the payments (not much, but still) we receive from the state for NOT having an income. And day care (for only 1 child) would have swallowed more than 50% of my net salary, so I couldn�t afford that either, especially since I would have made too much money to receive any financial help for day care.
I don�t understand how it�s possible that having 5 children in day care can be affordable for a working single parent. And you�re saying it�s even better, financially speaking than staying at home and receiving financial help !?

Spirit,

Have you tried to apply for SSI (social security supplemental income) for your three who are disabled? I know my ex's sister filed SSI for her daughter who had slight delays and my ex's younger sister was on SSI for Severe depression and anxiety. I would check to see if your 3 qualify. Hope things get better. Is there anyway for you to work at night and stay home during the day?? I know that worked for me when my daughter was an infant. She was asleep when I left and I got home right before or just as she was waking up.

Shannon