If you could go back in time and do things differntly would you?

For myself I would have gone to college like I wanted to yet I thought I wouldn't be able to do it working full time. And my parents didn't encourage me to go to college I guess cause neither of them ever finished high school. Now I have 2 girls and think that would have been so much easier than trying to do that now. (I plan to go to college sometime in the future)
Then I wouldnt have met my husband. I love my girls dearly. But I wish I would have been smarter back then. But now I can hopefully encourage my girls to go to college. (Hoping that I can pay for it all too!) And not to be in a hurry to get married and have children right away. There's nothing like having a family but there's always plenty of time.

I know it is always easier to look at your life and say: "I should have..." It would be nice to be able to have just one �do over�. Then I look at where I am now. Sure I might have had an easier life; I know I would not have wasted 9 years with an abusive a-hole, (not my daughter�s father). Who�s to say that the new path would have been easier? I think what keeps me going is that I do not know what is around the corner. Then on the other hand I still have to wonder rather question why I did not get to have the �charmed� life? My closest friend always says that she was given such a wonderful husband and life because she had such a horrible childhood (I introduced her to her husband right after high school). I agree that she deserves to be happy, but do I deserve to go through bad relationship after bad relationship because I had good parents and a stable childhood? That thought makes me angry and even bitter. I don�t want to feel that way; I want to be proud of my life. I want to have to work hard for what I really want, not get it just because. I love my daughter! Everything in my life has lead up to having her. I will do absolutely anything for her; I think I owe it to her to show her that I am happy in the life that we live together.

Jenny

If I could go back in time...I wouldn't change anything except try to avoid the death of my sons father. He was shot and killed when I was pregnant with my youngest son, Tyjhe and my oldest son, Nasir was in the house when he was killed. I can't take back the fact that God has taken him away, but I wish he had the chance to watch his sons grow up; and they would get a chance to know their father.

Also, I love my kids with all my heart; I don't regret having them I just wished I would've waited. Right now I'm attending a local university, but growing up I always dreamed about going away to college and living on campus. It's kind of hard trying to do that with 3 kids who are, 5,3, 9 mths. and being 18 weeks pregnant. Although, I may not be living the way I planned, I'm still happy being 20 yrs. old with 3 beautiful kids and one more addition on the way to be added into the family.

hmmm...if i could go back and change my life what would i do? i'll be honest and admit that i would like to see how my life would have truned out if i had not had my son. i think maybe i could have gained what a missed out on in the younger years. life would be cheaper and all i'd have was me to worry about not a child and me.

then i look at what i have achieved because i have my son and man i've do so much better for myself in many ways. my son is my hero, my goal achiever, my supporter and everything else. for example i graudated college this past May, i am now a service manager, a drug free person. i'm a better person because of him.

so as the old saying goes life isn't always greener on the other side. i think about the life that i could have had and then i think how can i miss or regret something that i never had in the first place...know what i mean?

i have bad days but over all i'm 90% happy with what i have in life. it isn't the greatest but it's mine.

so to make a long story short no i would not change a thing i did in my life.

smvt

I have pondered this very question many times throughout my pregnancy thus far and have come up with many answers as to what I would change. But then I had to stop and think, "If I were to go and change that then this would not have come to be, or this...and so on." So I decided I would not change one thing that I have done in my past. Sure, I am soooooo not proud of so many of the things I have done, however the mistakes and choices we make and the things we do make us the people we are today. If I had not had to grow up so fast I would not be who I am...and I really love me!!!!

I've also thought about this question. I truly believe that every single event in our life happens for a reason. I've made so many mistakes- the kind that you take to the grave and think about every day... I've often wondered - If i was in the same situation, with the same mentality, following the same chain of events that made certain situations, I would have done the exact same thing, no matter how many times I've relived the moment! But I guess, though it sounds cliche, every mistake we've made- every experience we've had, makes us who we are today! - be it good or bad..

I think that the only thing that I would change would be to have taken better care of myself. When I was in my twenties I didn't realize how hard it would be to take off those extra pounds in my thirties!! Other than that I'm pretty satisfied with the way things have turned out so far. It's been tough alot of the time but it's all been worth it I think.

Hi Igohard83

sorry to hear about your kids dad, that must have been terrible, how did your kids handle it? I have sort of an idea how you must have felt, my girls dad was arrested and sent to prison and I never got to see him again, one day he's there and everything is fine then, Boom, he's gone, no time to say good bye, no time to say I love you, nothing he's just gone

The only thing I would change is the fact that I married my son's father! I was so smart not to marry my first son's father, but when I found out I was pregnant, I jumped the gun and married this man. He is the father of my 10 month old son, but I could have gone on and had my son without marrying his father. The only reason I got married was because I kept thinking how hard it was to do it alone the first time and I had the opportunity to get married this time. The marriage was awful! Then I had to hire a lawyer for custody and now I have to pay for a divorce! Every time I get in a relationship, I get knocked 3 feet backwards financially. I am still trying to recover. We are a wonderful little family (my 2 sons and me), but I just wish I hadn't gotten married. It wasn't all I thought it would be!

If I could go back.. I would of gone to uni and write for a living. I still want my two kids but would of had them now..I would not of married my ex and hope my mr right came my way.. as now I am a single mum and work part time in a school.. and feel old. oh well lol

...I would not change one thing...
...but there is a lot I want to change for our future...
D.

..

Like most people I would imagine, there are things from the past that were "less than perfect", alright, more like some VERY trying times. But if I changed those I would not be the person I am today, and by changing the past I would risk changing the future by having altered my life's lessons and personal strengths that have gotten me to where I am, and help me to get where I'm going. If I thought any differently, then I just might expect that life could be perfect, and that will just never be.

dscontructs,
I like your answer. That is basically what I am also thinking.
My choices in the past were certainly not perfect, but, all in all I am glad with the outcome, mainly having a super duper son and a very unreliable and basically useless Dad whom I would still not exchange for another (another Dad I mean).
D.

...oh, talking about changing the past:

has anyone ever read 'Pastwatch / The redemption of Christopher Columbus' by Orson Scott Card.
It is definitely scary what can happen, if you change history. My advice would be, if you're even half way happy with your life as it is, don't change your past (if you could). You don't know what the new present and future would be.