Okay, so I met someone about two months ago, things were going great up until he left for a business trip to Toronto. He was different. Withdrawn and not attentive as he usually is. Thought maybe he was over tired. So I made a remark that he was "different" and couldn't pin point how or why. Later he admitted he had been smoking pot. If I had not been attentive to his change of behaviour I might not have asked to find out he had been smoking pot. Not to mention when we first dated we went through those questions and as far as I understood he did that when he was a teenager. Now he tells me he does it when his friends have some to smoke. For obvious professional and personal reasons, I told him that it wasn't going to work out.

Question:
What do you think, should I let him go and move on? Or was I too hard on him?

Choices:
Move On and let him fly on his own
Miranda you're too judgemental

 

It all depends on your stance on drugs- I am a NO DRUGS person- I will not tolerate it at all...there for, my vote was for let him go and move on....I guess it all depends on your comfort level with drugs- but Me, I am not comfortable with ANY drugs!

Move on - there's someone else out there waiting for you to pass on this guy.

Kick him to the curb!! ....just finding the "recent history" of one my previous GF drug use was "enough" to make up my mind.

Something I WIL NOT deal with. That's that.

You deserve better.

Dangit!! apparently you can only vote once!!

LOL

I agree move on! I know back in my hoodlum *spelling?* days I smoked pot and didn't see it as a big deal. Now I just think it's not responible when you've got kids to do anything illegal. Plus he wasn't up front about it, it would be one thing if he told you about it, but he gave you the impression he only did it as a teen. Giving someone the wrong impression and lieing seem to go hand in hand to me. Just my thoughts.

That's the main reason my now-ex bf and I broke up last week. He's been drinking more and more lately, and picking fights with me while drunk, but never laid a hand on me and it hasn't affected my kids (so far). But when I found out he'd been smoking pot with his friends (even in our driveway in their car a couple of times ) I was very unhappy. I will not put up with it.

All it takes is for them to fail a drug test or get busted ONCE. Then, your could try to pull something about you having a druggie in your life around your kids. I'm sorry, but my kids mean more to me than that.

Wow...If I can just change the tone of this thread just a little.

I cannot express to you ladies...how "proud" of you I am...REALLY, SINCERELY....especially since I've known SO MANY women that would not drop a loser guy that did drugs because they were afraid of being alone.

So to see this great attitude...as tough as it is...of you ladies...doing what is right; wow...I'm so proud to have you as my friends.

quote:

Originally posted by paulj_in_phx:
Wow...If I can just change the tone of this thread just a little.

I cannot express to you ladies...how "proud" of you I am...REALLY, SINCERELY....especially since I've known SO MANY women that would not drop a loser guy that did drugs because they were afraid of being alone.

So to see this great attitude...as tough as it is...of you ladies...doing what is right; wow...I'm so proud to have you as my friends.

Its not an easy thing to do. A guy I dated a few months back (nothing serious, but still...) told me a few weeks into the relationship that he was stoned more than he wasnt! I was like OH WOW!!! That about ended it for me...not to mention in that same conversation he proceeded to tell me that a few years ago he had been busted for having child **** and was a listed *** offender!! YIKES!! One more reason I dont introduce my daughter to the guys I meet!

Drugs are a big no no you need to show him the door and move on its illegal nevr know what he would do when high and being around your kids and smoking is not something you want to have...
You will get a better man i think or rather hope there are some out there

quote:

Originally posted by paulj_in_phx:
Dangit!! apparently you can only vote once!!

LOL

LOL Paul! How many votes were you about to cast anyway?

Hey Miranda, if I were you I might have asked him to share the pot with me, then we smoke pot together!! We'll have a pot date LOL!

If he reacts and says no, then tell him he should not do it too. (Weird, but some men do weird things that they dont want their women doing)

On the other hand, if he agrees to the "pot date"... then dump him.

OH what I would do for just ONE pot date.....

Honestly, I think the lying bothers me more than the pot itself. Not that the pot is good either. I used to have the attitude that if he smoked a little pot, it wasn't a big deal as long as it wasn't around me. Unfortuneatly, most of the recreational pot users i've dated actually did more than pot. That's where it gets bad.

I think you made the right decision.

Liars do really make me mad too.
Illegal drugs are never a good thing to tolerate. I know growing up with a dad who loves his weed. I was really scared that it would prevent me from getting my security clearance but it didn't. THANKFULLY!

hi everyone...im new in here so i would like to present myself as single daddy of one little dude of 5 ...my vote here is NO ..it will not work..leave im in is own world..lol..i know by experience...infortunately..bye and good luck with that..\

p.s ..is that u there on the little pic?

WELCOME! mememememememememememememememememememe!!!

wow what a longlonglonglonglonglonglonglong name!

LOL