Yeah I know it's a title of a book by Joshua Harris. I found it quite prude when I read it. But now I'm gonna follow the title (not the content though). I'm sick and tired of the dating scene. The whole concept of dating is exhausting to me. You go out with some stranger, with the intention of seeing if you're meant for each other. So you size each other up -- you become a bit discriminating, and at the same time, you also become self-conscious knowing that you are also being sized up by your date. Now doesnt that defeat the purpose of dating? How in the world will you know if you are a good fit for each other if both of you cannot act naturally towards each other? As if you have to "perform" and show off your best qualities. It's like applying for a job with an employer. And when the date doesnt call back, you feel rejected. Then you move on to another date.

I have heard from a lot of people that it is when you are not looking that love comes your way. I personally have experienced this. I have dated before, but none of my dates ever ended in a serious relationship. Ironically, the three serious relationships I had came from church, from work and from post-grad school -- during those times when I was just doing my daily activities and tasks, not caring what these men thought about me. Well, the relationships didn't last, but at least they lasted more than one date.

Oh well, maybe I'm really not the dating type. I guess I dont find it worth my while to exert some effort trying to spend time with a stranger or a mere acquaintance. LOL, I think I'll just marry a close friend of mine so there is no need to go through the "dating" phase

You know, someone told me the other day....that I need to "date myself" for a while.

And although, I thought I had....well, after this weekend, on the road with my kids... I realized I hadnt.

So, the "old Paul" is on the road to coming back.

thats wise comment PAUL. and go tell that my dad!

quote:

Originally posted by paulj_in_phx:
You know, someone told me the other day....that I need to "date myself" for a while.

And although, I thought I had....well, after this weekend, on the road with my kids... I realized I hadnt.

So, the "old Paul" is on the road to coming back.

Maybe I should take that advice, date myself until...well...well...until...Oh, who the **** knows!?

I **** at dating because I'm honest and not that good at the subtle deceptions. "Want to see my bank account? I'm broke this week. My back yard is a mess. Want to watch my 4 year old pitch a major fit, cause nobody can throw one like he does." Ah, I'm not really bad (but my 4 year old really does have quite a temper).

I just want to be myself and have some no pressure fun. The last date i had I felt like I was on a job interview. Now, I've actually gotten more job offers in life than I have accepted. Still, I don't like the stress of being put on the spot like that.

Ok, so why not date someone that shares an interest with you, just for the sake of getting out, and with no expectation of going further except for friendship?
I dunno...LOL

LOL, yeah I think I've dated myself several times because I'd really rather be alone than with some stranger who's trying to ask me questions they do at a job interview.

"What do you do?"
"Where did you go to college?"
"What are your hobbies?"

The same questions pop when you move on to the next date. *YAWN* Well, I can just date for fun and without expectations, but most dates would just do the usual dinner or movie date. *double YAWN*

Can't these men get creative for once??

Dawn.....Men Creative?????? LOL...hmmm

ok, men, it was a joke "ducking".

Ok, supposing we removed the word "date" from the entire situation and replaced it with "new friends". What would you like to do that is creative with them? Stay tame Dawn, stay tame..LOL

quote:

Originally posted by Dawn Butterfly:
LOL, yeah I think I've dated myself several times because I'd really rather be alone than with some stranger who's trying to ask me questions they do at a job interview.

"What do you do?"
"Where did you go to college?"
"What are your hobbies?"

The same questions pop when you move on to the next date. *YAWN* Well, I can just date for fun and without expectations, but most dates would just do the usual dinner or movie date. *double YAWN*

Can't these men get creative for once??

Uh....Hullo? LOL

Dont even try that one.....the ladies do the SAME thing....ONLY...if you actually answer the questions...you know...like the serious ones that come up? You're all of a sudden too open, too nice, too honest...and not enough of a mysterious stranger yet to be discovered.

Dont try to deny it.

quote:

Originally posted by Singleparentcoach:
What would you like to do that is creative with them? Stay tame Dawn, stay tame..LOL

LMAO! Am I not tame enough for ya? I used the word "creative"... not "exciting"... LOL. But hey, if a man can make a "date" exciting then I'm on it!

quote:

Originally posted by paulj_in_phx:
Uh....Hullo? LOL

Dont even try that one.....the ladies do the SAME thing....ONLY...if you actually answer the questions...you know...like the serious ones that come up? You're all of a sudden too open, too nice, too honest...and not enough of a mysterious stranger yet to be discovered.

Dont try to deny it.

Eeek, the darn serious questions are the ones that freak me out. Some men actually ask questions about your previous relationships

And yeah, I know a lot of women do ask serious questions. Not me though, because I wouldnt want the questions thrown back at me so I keep it taboo

quote:

LMAO! Am I not tame enough for ya? I used the word "creative"... not "exciting"... LOL. But hey, if a man can make a "date" exciting then I'm on it!

Uhm...I think you need to date more to get any of that. LOL

It's worse than a job interview. Most of the questions would be illegal during an interview.

quote:

Originally posted by Singleparentcoach:

quote:

LMAO! Am I not tame enough for ya? I used the word "creative"... not "exciting"... LOL. But hey, if a man can make a "date" exciting then I'm on it!

Uhm...I think you need to date more to get any of that. LOL

Uhh... just to clarify... "exciting" for me means some "outdoor" activity like mountain climbing, snorkeling and the like. I think you're thinking more of the "indoor" activity Miranda. LOL

You guys empower me on one topic and scare me on others. The dating thing is very scary. I have not ventured yet on one. When I do it will be my first one in 13 years. I'm nervous and I've been reading this site for a while. Finally got up the nerve to register so I can have a voice. The one topic back in February where you guys were encouraging the guy whose 13 year old wanted a puppy and navel piercing and he was frustrated with life was very nice to read. I felt vendicated (sp). This topic scares me especially since I have small kids and girls at that. Need a little encouragement any of you guys in meaningful relationships now?