I have a twenty-two month old and a serious boyfriend. They spend a great deal of time together and adore each other-to the point sometimes I feel a bit left out We have sleepovers now, but were discussing when she's going to start realizing more and if we needed to stop sleeping over at some point. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. She is used to sleeping elsewhere as she has occasional sleepovers at both grandma's houses. Thanks!

When I was dating my now ex-husband we never ever slept together when he had his girls - we even went away and got a 3 bedroom place!

If you two are heading toward marriage I wouldn't make a change as timing will be fuzzy for her. But if you are not, then I'd stop now.

Reminds me of my very first post here - I was looking for advice and to vent as my ex had decided to start letting her new BF (of a whole month or so) start sleeping over on the weekend when she had the boys - even though I have them half the time, including every other weekend, so they had plenty of other time to get together. And that was just 6/7 months after we had split. Just shocked me, and I was happy to find that most people felt the same way. I totally agree with you Laurie, unless this is very serious and you see marriage in the future, then I would stop.

I'm a firm believer that you shouldn't even introduce your children to someone unless you know it's something serious. My ex introduced our kids to all of his new girlfriends within a week of beginning dating them and I was the one left to answer all the questions. Then the most recent one he now lives with and that's a whole other ball game. I think that it really depends on how serious the relationship is and how attached your daughter already is to your boyfriend.

My mother was a serial dater...I came out pretty warped from it...It's hard to like a father figure and imagine him as your dad then POOF he's out and some clown is telling you how to be a man...For this very reason my princess has yet to meet someone who gives me butterflies...Y

Well, everyone's value system is different, so only you can decide what you think is in the best interest of your child.

My son is five, and i didn't date until he had just turned four. The man I was seeing did spend the night but my son was always already in bed & the BF always set his alarm & was out the door before my son woke up (his choice). At the time i actually wanted him to stay & sleep in, have breakfast with us, etc. but in retrospect I'm glad that didn't happen. I was (still am) inexperienced as to how to have a relationship as a single mom & i think it was a good learning experience. So, for me i probably will NOT have overnight guests unless we are in a committed relationship with the same family oriented goal.

Examine where you think this relationship is heading, and discuss the pros & cons of his overnights with him.

I think there are a few things that aren't clear enough for a response here...1) you said serious...how serious? 2) Is there another parent in the picture? EX: Do you have any time that you have a free weekend or a night here & there? Dating as a parent is such tricky territory...Your child is still young & if they already have a great relationship, that is important. Just side with caution...it is hard enough for an adult to deal with the ups & downs in a relationship...putting a child into the equation before you are certian yourself can be painful for all of you...especially for a child that just doesn't have the capacity to understand. It's one of the challenges in this whole crazy world of single parenting!!

I'm going through an absolute nightmare with my kids "mom"... She had some guy move in a year and a half ago. Nine years her junior... I have the kids full time and she was every other weekend. I found out about this guy about two weeks after he moved in to the 1br apartment because my son (then 6) told me he sees this guy naked in bed with his mom. I hit the roof. I tried to stop the overnights and was lambasted by the judge for inappropriately trying to controll my ex... A year and a half of **** with this guy mouthing me off at every chance, dis-respecting my kids, allowing my son to find and play with his hand-gun. My ex finally kicked him out four months ago, on his way out he threw out a bunch of my kids toys. Now, four months later there's a new guy living there...

I would never introduce my kids to a potential partner for a min. of six months of exclusive dating and firm commitment. Any warning signs and I would never introduce them.

C