Since Im not sure where to post this being as Iam Canadian and so is everyone in here,I thought I would post it here...

Im a 24 year old high school drop out who never had a paying job other then babysitting,and live with my mom and dad and my 6 yr old son..
Im not sure where to begin so much has happened in my life that I dont know weather to be happy and just say its "God's Plan"cry,or just literally throw punchs and not at anyone just to let it out...
I was 17 turning 18 when I found out I was pregnant and I felt my life right there was over...As awful as this probably sounds I never wanted my son but I didnt want anyone else to either and I dont think I could have gone through with an abortion..Im glad he is here and I love him dearly..I almost lost myself when he nearly died when he was just under a month old(A whole other complication that I will get into another time)Every year since he was born I have been to court to fight for what I believe is mine..My first year I was gained full custody my second year my son's dad was able to finally get supervised access(he is not a decent person hence why he got supervised)4 times he fought for full custody instead of even attending his supervised access the 5th time I went in for support when I heard he was working I won $305.00 per month and he got unsupervised access 3 Saturdays a month the 6th time which is now is he has abandoned his son and Im still yet to recieve my child support..I have had children's aid called on me and he had children's aid called on him too but with me they signed a statement right there saying I was a fit proper mother..With him things escaladed,now his boss is helping him by signing his checks with another name that is close to his real name so he dont have to pay child support and the only reason Iam yet to recieve was because I dont have his social insurance number..My constant battle with his dad is hurting me and I dont let my son see or know there is a fight.I feel I need to protect us both is there anything more I can do;getting a job is really hard and I have applied to more business then I can think of and have had more interviews then I can count on my fingers and toes...
Iam so hopeless right now that Im starting to think that maybe my son could do better without me!!!!

Hey,

I was 18 turning 19 when my son was born. I understand how bleak that situation can be. I was lucky in that my son had two parents; we actually got married before he was born. I wasn't lucky, however, in that our families couldn't (or wouldn't) help us.

Please vent about your situation here...seriously, it will make you feel better. Understand that the best way to solve your problems, however, is to make a plan to fix them and follow through with it. Your problem is that you need employment and financial stability? Well, at 24yo that is well within your reach (even if it doesn't seem so now). Have you done anything yet to make up for not graduating High School? It not, it sounds like that'd be a good start.

Later,
Bobby

Hi there..
Sounds to me like you have had your fair share of the system here in Canada. I'm in Ontario too...near Kitchener. My situation was alot different from yours except for the child support part of it. If you're in the process of going to court right now, I'd include a court order for child support and have them file it through the Family Repsonsibility Office. I know that it all seems overwhelming at times but please know that there are lots of people here that can help. Whether it's for a listening ear and support or to share things that they've learned by going through it themselves, let us know and we can help. I'm not sure if you've dealt with the FRO but if you need to ask any questions...feel free....I've been through the routine and can help.

Hey, I was a little younger then you when I had my kids, Im so sorry you had to go thru all that, i was very lucky my child support issues have been very civil and easily made.
I also live with my dad and the only job i had before my kids was a fry truck for a summer and last summer as a radio 'summer patrol girl'..but im in school. Is there anything you like or want to do? because i know st.clair college offers lots of 2 year programs and night classes, part time, full time...u could totaly do it, and it would make u feel so much better to be doing something more with your life!
well good luck take care!

Thanks everyone for listening and responding..
Its really hard to go through what I have and still am going through..
Im in the FRO system he is already $5000.00 owing and he is in the credit collection..He doesnt drive so they cant take his license away he doesnt own anything either...I cant collect till I get social insurance number;and he wont give it to me let alone tell me where he moves to..
The sad part is its not me or him who suffers its our son,and its hard when I hear my own son says he has a bad dad that he chooses not see him,but his dad put him through a bad situation!!!
I tried the home schooling and it was hard to sit and concentrate with a new baby and by night time I was drained,then i wanted to do night schooling but the cost is high when you dont make anything and Iam having a hard time making anything without having a diploma..(kind of like a dog chasing his tail)
Every night I cry,and pray for God to help but I feel that its so far behind help that even himself cant help!!!

Hey,

You may have to accept that you won't ever get anything out of this guy. You should keep trying to get him to pay, but there's a real possibility that you won't ever get anything. You can't may someone pay, if they're willing to own nothing and do nothing with their lives. Some guys are willing to go to jail. I know it's not fair...maybe you can find comfort, in that they punished themselves a lot more than they punished their kids, by doing absolutely nothing with their lives. Your son and you can still make something of yourselves, without his help.

You said it was hard to sit and concentrate with a new baby? Man, I know that it's hard. My son was born in my first year of college. It wasn't impossible though, and I am *so* much better now having made myself done it then. If you are praying to god for something, it should be for Him to give you the will to make yourself get that diploma. It's going to be hard for awhile, but it will make the rest of your life so much easier.

Bobby

You are right.

It is hard.

Hard but not impossible.

keep making phone calls keep after the FRO.

It is their mandate to assist you in collecting the support for your son's benefit.
call your local MPP and ask for assistance with finding a way to ged your High school diploma.

Contact one of the Ombudsman's for the essex County area.

Ask for assistance in finding out how you can get your diploma, get the FRO to move on him. There are ways .

You have to take action and responsibility for keep on trying.