Hello!
I'm trying to find my "peers" in the single parenting world who have experienced similar situations and can tell me what *may* be expected...I'm one of those, always trying to figure out his next step so as not to be surprised when it happens..

Basically, I became pregnant with a terrible (found out during pregnancy) person (you name it, he did it)...anyway, I left him before my lovely daughter was born...he came for the birth but left suddently (less than 48 hours) even though he was invited to stay...He served me with papers months later...in the meantime he asked to visit 5 or 6 times, I always said yes, as to not impede the would-be relationship between father and daughter - but he never showed up (we're over 1,000 miles away)...I struggled through courts and he, after having served ME, didnt show up for any court dates except to discuss money (that's what he really cares about - and that's exactly what I don't care about)...I went to court and obtained full custody and he can only visit when "mother says it is okay"..which is wonderful...our daughter is 19 months old and we haven't seen him since...he owes ALOT in CS, frequently emails about money, his loss of license (how it is my fault) - but I don't reply - I'm completely done fighting...and refuse to get upset because I want to enjoy every second with my daughter...anyway, this fall he plans on paying off all the CS he owes (win a lawsuit he has) and "reopening th lines of communication" between us....I will not discuss anything but the well-being of our daughter or answer his questions about visitation...things directly related to the order...I'm not his friend..

so...super-long story (although that is the very-short version!)...what do you all think I can expect from him in regards to a relationship with our daughter? Is he likely to all of a sudden become worlds best dad? will he visit all the time? (he was on probation and supposedly couldn't leave the area for 6 months - yes, he had a whole other 13 months to visit but chose not to)..

what is the "guys" mentality? He thinks he'll pay then things will be great...

I won't ever block his relationship but I don't ever want my daughter to be uncomfortable or let down...

I know it's impossible to predict but what do you all see happening?? anyone have anything similar occur? How'd it turn out?

Hello hotjuly,

I can truely relate to the level of communication you are trying to instil with your child's father.

I asked the question about what could I possibly expect out of my EX in his relationship with his children. I've come to the conclusion that what he has chosen to do yesterday, would more than likely be what he'll choose to do tomorrow. Maybe, there's the possiblity of him changing and he may be an incredible father... he doesn't have too many childhood years leff.

It makes me sad, however, I do not see my boys having any ill feelings for their father. (and my EX left when my youngest was 6 months old)

Wishing you the best.

Tessmit,

Thank you for replying...you're absolutely right, and my friends (who haven't had similar circumstances) say the same as you - that what he did yesterday is a good indicator of things to come. It's so sad though in some ways, but in other ways I'm so happy her father turned out this way. It's really a strange feeling to have. It's sad that she may not know her true father very well ever, but happy I have her all to myself and she won't have to see any of his behaviors (which are less than great). Luckily I have a strong family and friend circle - and they are very much around.

He may change though, you're right....I'm wondering if anyone has seen "a change" like this in an ex...doesn't seem to happen much...

Please support a children of incarcerated felons bill of rights in your state.


Dear Senator Joyner:


I am a divorced parent who just found out that my ex-husband was a felon. He has been caught driving with a suspended license atleast 3 times. They were suspended for either nonpayment of support or lack of insurance. I know that he drove with my child in the car while he was on probation and his tags were expired. The date of the start of his probation was August of last year and we had a meeting with our lawyers in September of last year. I vividly remember getting upset the he drove my son with expired tags. My exhusband's lawyer said that I was being nit picky. I am not sure if my exhusband did not tell the lawyer about it or the lawyer lied. Either way my child was in danger. Driving a car without current tags means that you are not insured which means you are breaking the law. If my child gets hurt without him having insurance I couldn't afford it.
Anyway I just found out about this on Wednesday. I found out who his probation officer was and tried to get his travel papers revoked, but the judge had already signed them. I had to let my son go with his father out of state. I was told by my lawyer that I could be held in contempt of court. This is very very disturbing, I just want to keep my child safe. I cannot believe there is not a law that entitles the mother of children or the children the right to know that the their father or mother is a convicted felon. The probation officer just told me that they are only required to tell his employer. My child is only 2 and has had some major health issues in the past which required tube feeding and heart monitors(his father never took part in working these devices). I also do not want to have my child see his father put in jail for breaking the law.

Please make it a law in Florida for all children and their legal guardians be notified when a parent has been convicted of a felony. I believe that this would be safer for the child and it would allo the other parent to know the rules of the convicts probation and the severity of the offense. This would allow them to reorganize visitation of the children if needed.


DC Number: R54247
Name: BERNSTEIN, JASON IRVING
Race: WHITE
***: MALE
Hair Color: BROWN
Eye Color: BLUE
Height: 6'03''
Weight: 230 lbs.
Birth Date: 08/03/1974
Supervision Begin Date: 08/24/2007
Current Location: CLEARWATER
Current Status: ACTIVE
Supervision Type: PROBATION FELONY
Scheduled Termination Date: 08/23/2008


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Current Verified PERMANENT Address:
5205 PANORAMA AVE
HOLIDAY, FL 34690

Aliases:
JASON BERMSTEIN JASON BERNSTEIN
JASON IRVING BERNSTEIN JASON IRVING BERNSTERIN

Note: The offense descriptions are truncated and do not necessarily reflect the crime for which the offender is on supervision. Please refer to the court documents or the Florida Statutes for further information or definition.
Current Community Supervision History:
Offense Date Offense Sentence Date County Case No. Community Supervision Length
03/17/2007 DRIV W/LIC S/R/C/D FELONY 08/24/2007 PINELLAS 0705765 1Y 0M 0D


If there is anything that you can do to help me with my own custody case that would be great.

Thank you for your time!
Leigh Bernstein
P.O. Box 16914
Tampa, Florida 33687

Oops! I meant to add my statement. My honest opinion my son is 3. he thinks dad is great because he does not know all the facts. He is a kid and he shouldn't. Therefore he does not tell his father that he is making really really stupid decisions. Which I am hoping the rest of the world is telling him. My ex is $7000 behind in child support and wants more visitation!