My mother an I don't have a good relationship. My father sends me and my brother child support child support still Tt's in my mothers name though. I don't see any of it im struggling trying to pay my bills and everything.She has been kicking me out the house since I was 15 years old im 21 now an my brother is 20.

Before I go into too much of a reply, I've got to ask, how old are you now?

Hi !
I don't understand your sentence: you're receiving child support (from your child's father ?!) but your own father sends it back ? Please explain.
How old is your child ?
Tell us more.
Daniela

Im 21 an im out on my own my mother didn't give me a choice. Im struggling day to day to pay my bills. She does't help me an she doesn't give me any of that money.

I guess I got ya.
You have no child.
�our mother receives money from your father for you and your younger brother ?!
And you're saying that money should go to you direct.
sorry

Yes because im out here with no help she doesn't help me.And she blows the child support money on beer an her boyfriend

How is it he is still sending support, are you full time in school? Did your first post read something about back support, before it was edited? If it is current support for being a fulltime student, you are an adult and could petition the court for the money to go direct to you, if it is back support that he is paying, it does go to your mom to make up for cost incurred in raising children, clothes, food, shelter etc. Guess we're still a bit confused on some of the details.

Well, maybe you should find an area to cut down on your bills. Plus, u are 21 that's part of life, finding a way to make it. Struggling is just how life goes.

The child support is for your mom to raise you. You are now an adult. You aren't supposed to get the support, it is channelled through your everyday expenses that costed your mom. (heat, water, clothing, food, shelter) Child support is to help with your everyday expenses while raising you. It is probably back child support she is still recieving. You aren't entitled to collect any of the child support. Your mom can spend the money how ever she sees fit. You need to move on and forget about that money....it isn't yours. If you are having trouble with your bills, you need to get another job. Lucky for you you don't have to worry about a child to care for too. Time to grow up!!

What in the world are you talking about? It sounds as if you should be 15. You are 21. Of course you are out on your own. Of course you are struggling. Isn't almost any 20 something year old trying to make it out in the world? If the support is really supposed to go to you, by all means seek it. Other than that your mom owes you nothing. You are an adult and as someone else said, this is life. How did you think it was going to be? What do you do for work?

quote:

Originally posted by Gabriel's Mom:
[qb]Well, maybe you should find an area to cut down on your bills. Plus, u are 21 that's part of life, finding a way to make it. Struggling is just how life goes.[/qb]

Guys why not find out the whole story before telling her to grow up. Just from what I read her mom kicked her out at 15. She has been on her own trying to survive for 6 years. 3 of which her mom should have been raising her. If she is in school then she should get the money not her mom. If she isn't then yes her mom should receive it and spend it as she pleases. We need to watch how we word things on here. Many of those posts to me would have felt more like being critical then being supportive and helpful.

Shannon

Chicagomom, I wasn't meaning it to be harsh, but the fact is she now is 21 years old and feels that her mother owes her money. I read that her mom has been kicking her out since age 15. Sounds to me like she is back and forth. Her state of being now is that she is 21. Past is past and she can't do anything about that. She should be angry with is her mom (depending on the circumstances) but she should also be angry with her dad, for not seeing to his kids well being and fighting for his kids to have a proper raising.

I still stay it is time to forget about the money, it only is causing her to harbor hateful, and resentful feelings. (who needs that) She can't do anything about that. It is now time to grow up and take care of herself.

I agree obviously, read my previous post. All the facts aren't quite on the table yet. It is possible that support was being paid after the age of 18 if she is a fulltime student and therefore could be money that should be going to her, or possible that she is expecting something that she isn't entitled to.
While we don't know what the whole story is we can't/shouldn't assume one way or the other. I'm sure it easily upsets those that are struggling, and know that life is a struggle, but we need to keep in mind there is a chance that she is talking about money that she is entitled to.
Believe me, I'd be posting the grow up messages as well if this is money she has no claim to, but I can't yet say that for certain. Maybe if we haven't scared her off yet she will repost with further explanations.

quote:

Originally posted by Chicagomom1:
[qb]Guys why not find out the whole story before telling her to grow up. Just from what I read her mom kicked her out at 15. She has been on her own trying to survive for 6 years. 3 of which her mom should have been raising her. If she is in school then she should get the money not her mom. If she isn't then yes her mom should receive it and spend it as she pleases. We need to watch how we word things on here. Many of those posts to me would have felt more like being critical then being supportive and helpful.

Shannon[/qb]

I dunno but a lot of people have had it much worse and if she's been on her own for 6 years you'd think she would have it down by now. i'm not trying to be mean, just realistic.

Wait, how is the mother entitled to collect the back support for a period of time she was not supporting her child? �Thembi� said that she was kicked out at age 15� her mother did not provide for her, someone else did. Whether it was a friend�s family, grandparent or her self it does not matter, the mother should not get any money for not providing for her child. If the mother did help to contribute to her living expenses during that period of time (to who ever took over in �Thembi�s� upbringing) then she should be entitled to collect back support for that period of time.

�Thembi�, I think you should cut your losses and move on because you will probably not see a penny of that money. I am sorry that you have had such a rough time but unfortunately that is life. You may want to look for other options. Are you in college or trade school? Maybe find a roommate� Have you spoken to your father about any of this?

Good luck,
Jenny