Hi everyone,

Well, I am 6 months pregnant and my boyfriend (well, ex now) just drove over to where I live, dumped me and left me in tears. I am more depressed than I can remember. We agreed to be civil around the child, but what hurts the most is that at first he was pushing me very hard to have an abortion. Then he flipped around and became really supportive. A few weeks after that, he stopped talking to me and became very distant. This pattern repeated itself one more time until today, when he told me he didn't want to be a part of my life anymore, and it's a shame that we can't still do anything about this child. (meaning that it is too late for me to abort which I told him I wouldn't do no matter what)
I just don't know what to do, I am 25, this will be my first child and I just want to do what is best for him. (the baby) I know I will recover, but this has been a SERIOUS hit to my emotional equilibrium, especially after he was so adamant about being with me and in the child's life a few weeks ago.

For your sake and the Babies sake forget this ex of yours.

I know that it must hurt real bad now but in the end he is the loser.

The mother of my older boys has made such a mess of her relationship with them that they hardly talk to her.

The bio dad of my oldest was not involved in his life when he was young and now it is too late for him. But it was the bio dads choice.

Hope this helps a little.

I have been through this 3 times, you will get through it, but it will be sad. Find someone to lean on for now and then you will get stronger. Do not waste your energy on the dad, focus on yourself and the baby. It will be hard to do, but it will be for the best. Do not think about him, just plan for the baby and have fun with it.

I am going through exactly whatyou are going through except my little girls father has wanted nothing to do with it since the beginning. You just have to keep yourself busy and let him go. Don't continue to let him play games with you and keep you in an unhealthy emotional state for your little boys and your own sake. Take care of yourself and your baby and the happiness will come.

I think the supportive part was an act, not the real him.

The hurt, pain and fear you have now is intense. It's probably the most intense of your life but you can get through it and you will.

A real man would support your decisions on the child. You and your child deserve better. Never forget that.

Speaking as a guy there is something that really ticks me off when another guy gets a woman pregnant and then just takes off. It's really a beautiful and privileged experience to share with a woman.

I'm in the same place you are, except my ex-boyfriend wanted the baby. He was super-stoked, especially when he found out it was a boy. Now I'm 8 months pregnant and single and he's living with another girl. I almost wish he wanted nothing to do with the baby, I feel like it would be easier to call him an ******* and move on. But now he's a permanent part of my life as my baby's father and it feels like there's no way to escape the hurt, especially when I'm already so darn emotional.
I know how you feel, and I sympathize completely.

We as in human beings are stronger than we know at the moment when tragedy strikes or even than we can give ourselves credit for. You will get through this and you will be ok. If you stick around at this place we are all here or you.....

I am really sorry about this. I am semi-experiencing the same thing..except that my ex hasn't been supportive from the beginning. It's devistating, but honestly - it's NOT about him anymore! It's about my beautiful babee! If he wants nothing to do with such a precious child, then better for me - because I don't want a heartless coward raising my child. Best of luck girl. Feel free to PM me at anytime. I'm also 25 years old.

You got some good advice with those telling you to just focus on yourself and your baby, and also your friends and family around you. I have three older daughters with my ex-husband who I was with since our teens, but the father of my son was also a selfish coward and disappeared soon after the discussion of the pregnancy, then re-appeared the day I was delivering his son. (I might add that he did a good job of talking his way back into my life that day- feeling very vulnerable and full of hormones after just giving birth and wanting to believe things could work out- he cut the cord and everything) and actually hung around and kept his word for a while. But then when my son turned a year he disappeared again, called one month later to apologize again and tell us how much he loved us- and that is the last time we ever heard from him. My son is now 5 and his dad doesn't even know he has autism. It's disgusting to me how some guys (and women) can just completely detach and walk away from their child- no matter what their fears are, cause we have them too, and just live on and allow that to be their child's history. (Part of it at least). But I was happy to see you say you will recover because you truly will, and I know it's doubly hard because you're pregnant now and emotions are running high, but just take care of yourself and let yourself be excited about your new baby. And take comfort in knowing that even if he doesn't step up and help take care of his child, he didn't get off scott- free. His day will definately come.

this person sounds like a tosser, he is going to miss out on one of lifes miracles, thats his loss. You have to be strong for the baby now and yourself. You will be bringing a lovely little bundel of joy into the world and when you see that little bundel all your thoughts will be with it. I would love the chance to be part of a family, my girlfriend left me after telling me she was pregnat 2 months ago i was devestated al i want is to be a family. This guy really does not know what he is loosing, but think what you are gaining. Good luck