Hi everyone! I have been struggling lately as some of you may know with my ex's live in girlfriend and her relationship with my 4year old son. The past few days have been rough and i was just struggling so much with my ex talking to my son on the phone then handing it to his girlfriend to talk to him and her making a calendar for my son so he would know when his visits with his dad are, not to mention the card she sent me. Anyways, I discovered a website called bonusfamilies.com and went to the ex etiquette section and read it. Its great information and I highly recommend it for anyone struggling with you ex's partner. It really made me open my eyes to how I was feeling of course I have been nothing but civil, but the feelings were eating me up inside. Since my ex and I are trying to really get along now for the good of our son, I will really make an effort to reach out to her and hopefully she is in this for the long haul.

I can vouch for that site also. Had a very tough time over the weekend (worst Christmas season ever - my ex had the kids at her house (new boyfriend involved too), it was her normal weekend and she was able to afford to do much more than I so better for them, but very painful for me), but did find that site and read quite a bit which was helpful. Did get the kids Christmas Day in the afternoon and had our own special celebration - enjoyed every moment.

Im glad you at least had them for xmas day. Its always hard being away from your kids on holidays. Just know your not alone in this. I actually ordered the book Ex-Etiquette for parents- good behaviour after a divorce or seperation and I recieved it today and started reading. My ex had my son the 23rd and agreed to drop him off early on xmas eve for one of my family events so I know that was a huge compromise for him. I in turn gave him as a gift for xmas, a really awesome frame with four of my favorite pictures I took of my son this year and I wrote him a very nice and appropriate letter. The whole girlfriend or signifigant other's involvement in your childs life is really difficult. It looks good on paper being friendly and communicating with her but hard to apply to your situation. I will read more and eventually i will feel better about it. So far this book is great and I highly reccomend for anyone struggling with an ex an or the significant other.
Happy New Year Everyone!

I agree it is hard the worst for me with my first child was she often didn't get along with her stepmother and I found it real hard when the stepmother would punish my daughter I could go on and on but those days are over for me now, when she came home saying she had to spend the entire day in her room because of something she did I was like what! I wanted her to be with me and I was so powerless over what happened there. Maybe I need to look at that site to heal some old wounds.