Well the ex got married a few weeks ago and I found out yesterday that they are already expecting. I can't help but be angry. Not becasue I am jealous. Not because I care about them. I am angry because he never cared about my kids until I had his rights terminated a few months back. Now he has been coming to see the kids but irregularly because he can't afford to come more. He occasionally gives me $20-$40 which he legally is no longer required. My anger stems from the fact that they can barely afford to come to see the girls when it is just the two of them and with a baby I doubt he will be able to come at all.

I am just mad that my kids will be "losing" him again.

well pita, it doesn't really sound like they had him in the first place. The only thing I will note is guilt is a powerful thing, it drives a person more then love, it just doesn't last as long. peace

Wow Paul! How inciteful. That is exactly what I have been feeling but was unable to put words to it like you did. If genes were enough to create love for kids....there would be no orphanages. I just was hoping that guilt would allow him to stick around long enough for love to truly develop. His recklessness has shaddered another dream of mine again. It is funny how when I finally think he can no longer hurt me (since I don't love him like that anymore), he finds another way...by hurting my kids.

Sadly if you don't fall in love with your kids at first site, rarly does it develope. I wish it was otherwise. I remember my eldest there with her mom, so shiny and new, and needing a protector, sigh, those where the days, life was good. peace