It's been a while since I've been here, (a month or two now?) and wow! There are so many new people I don't recognize. Hope all I know are doing ok. I didnt have time to go through a lot of posts, I'm checking out the "new" people's stories.
Anyway, the new baby is almost 6 months. She is crawling already and pulling herself up on things. Its amazing how fast it goes. Just a few months ago, she could do barely anything.
I have much to vent about re: The "psycho" father of my oldest. My last post was asking if I had done the right thing when the court gave him only 3 weekends a month with her, and how he begged me to change my mind, even though it was him who initiated the motion. Well, I gave him another chance and shouldnt have. Fooled again. Now we're going to counseling with my b/f and his g/f involved. He has her totally brainwashed, or she is just as crazy as he is. They LIE so much and deny anything they've done. Freaks. It is so much a waste of time and money. I used to be a proponent of counseling, but with this experience I've had, I'm not so sure anymore. Things just seem to get worse. They want to re-hash things that have already been taken care of in court, and in mediations. Like they want to keep going to new people until they finally finds someone who believes their lies. ("they" are the psycho and his g/f) She keeps saying "I want this to stop" and "All of this is so petty." Yet, she wont stop bringing up petty stuff. I'm a bad mother because my daughter bit her toenails one time!! I said, "Some kids bite their toenails." her: "Really, I never heard of that." Well, just cause you never heard of it doesnt mean it doesnt happen. She claims I havent cut my daughters toenails in 4 years. Is it me or is this junk just so immature and petty?
Hope to hear back from some of you on this post. I miss it here, and miss you all. I've just been so busy with the baby I havent had the chance to get on.

Ummm. Is my post really boring? I see that there are 30 views, and I got no replies. Am I just being paranoid?

I have found the courage to post. I am fairly new to the SFV and like many others I have been leeching from everyone's concerns and anxieties as well as the great advice other members offer.

Now back to you, I was going through similar circumstances like you and tried to give my ex-wife another chance to be able to spend more time with my daughter but after a while my daughter and I were disapointed again by her attitude and lack of responsability towards her. My easy way out is that I had already settled limitations in court and had them written in our MSA so I just had to go and enforce them once again so that she would see my daughter only when she is suppose to.

As far as his GF, she does not have anything to do with your daughter, I know that you cannot prevent her from seeing her but you should ignore her.

My daughter bites her toenails. She's terrified of the clipper, so she would rather bite them off. I use the clipper when she's asleep to even them out. It's easier than fighting with her.

I dont mean to sound judgemental, but until boyfriends and girlfriends become husbands or wives, they really dont have any business involved in your child's counceling. I would keep this between you and the father. If my ex's girlfriend were to say something like that to me, I would have to reach over the councelor to knock her out.

That's not to say that boyfriends and girlfriends cant be a good influence, but people who dont have kids always think they know an aweful lot about parenting until they actually become parents. She doesnt necessarily understand your child and she may have her own interests at heart, not those of your child.

I hope things get better for you.

Thanks for your responses. I knew she wasnt the only child in the world who bit her toenails. I'd never even seen her do it, but I still dont think its a big deal.
Unfortunately, we tried many times many counselors with just the two of us, but since my b/f lives with me and our new daughter, and his g/f lives with him, we were "instructed" by the gaurdian ad litem to do it this way.
kdad, thats what I'm thinking. Its all in the court order that is in place now, we'll just have to go back to court and maybe then I'll ask to make it permanent.
Have to go again this weekend. I'm paying this guy (therapist)to entertain these freaks paranoid thoughts.

It's unfortunate that you are forced to participate in this. It doesn't sound very productive, but maybe once you get eveything aired out things will get better....or maybe not. You are welcome to cite me as a source for other children biting their toenails.

quote:

Originally posted by missabb:
You are welcome to cite me as a source for other children biting their toenails.

I was thinking that very thing. Ha ha. Have to go tomorrow morning, and have a few things planned to say.
You're from MN. What's your nationality?

Like most Minnesotan's I am German/Norwegian/other misc euro caucasian mixture. How bout you?

I'm Norwegian. I know there are a lot of Scandanavian's in the MN. area. That's where my daughters therapist is from.