Courage isn't the absense of fear but the willingness to act in the face of fear.

Sound familiar? Okay.

I'm quoting this because what I'm seeing here is not action but a reaction.

This is just what I gather from reading and knowing what I do of what is going on with you and your kids. You say your kids aren't capable of knowing what is best for them. Yes, that may be true, BUT let's look at the bigger picture here. What happens when they ARE mature enough to understand? How could you not being there effect their relationships not only as siblings but as individuals? Chances are they are going to fall victim to the same anxiety and depression that you have struggled with as well. They are going to blame themselves, and possibly each other, for what happened with their mom.

I'm not trying to beat you up about this and the last thing I want is to make you feel worse. Maybe you do need time away from them in order to make things better not just for them but yourself as well. I don't want to see that happen but deep down you know what is best. Just don't forget to think about your own needs a bit while deciding. I know it isn't completely in your hands either due to the legal aspect. Maybe you should sit those kids down and really talk it out. Explain it to them and don't hold back. If you think they are tough enough to survive without their mom then they are tough enough to understand what it is going to take to keep you all together as a family. Sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures. I may be totally off base here. I am not going to win parent of the year anytime soon myself. What I do know very well is the effect seperation from a parent takes on a young child. Before you make any decisions think real hard about the example you are setting for them. Will it make them better parents themselves someday? I don't know.

It's like 2 am here and I'm in a real fog so hopefully this makes some impact. Know that we all love and respect you for your friendship and all the things you bring to SFV. Those feelings will not change in the days to come.

Courage isn't the absense of fear but the willingness to act in the face of fear.