I would hate to think that there isn't any single parent on here that isn't doing well, minus the financial woes, children('s) father or mother giving them problems. I know this site is a relief to all of us...it sure has helped me tremendously these past few weeks, however,

DOES ANYONE HAVE ANYTING POSITIVE TO SHARE, I.E.

Met someone and have fell in love.
Bought their own home
Child support is flowing consistently
Children have graduated and gone on to do great things....
Gotten out of abusive relationships and now see a brighter tomorrow...

I ask this because all of stories can help the next person...especially the financial issues...

I'm 37 with bills flowing over and not very optimistic about OWNING my OWN home...Does anyone have anything inspiring to share....?

Thanks....you don't know how your story or situation can help the next person....

God Bless all of US!

All4mine,
I will share....
I do not own my own home ... but I did...I like the one I rent better and I can call the landlord when something breaks.
I got out of an abusive (mentally and emotionally) relationship and I am wiping the scars away (but will never forget them, because I will never let them be repeated!)
I do have a job ... although it is never enough money .. I love it, bitchy clients and all.
I can't afford the GAS this week lol.. none of us can!... but my car works!
I started back to school after 24 years and so far so good, I got a perfect A in the first class.
My daughter graduated to sixth grade with A/B honor roll and is entering the full time gifted program.
She also goes to live in camp for two weeks on the second of June ..... and it did not cost me a dime.... YAHOO!!!! .... vacation!
The electricity is on and so is the phone ... and I can create good meals from almost nothing.
The ex boyfriend ... the one I love and like .. is back in my life and it is a great thing.
I have my mother with me. She is my godsend and my friend.
We (my daughter, my mother and myself) are healthy again after having horrible bronchitis.

I do have to say ... there are many bad things surrounding us these days ... and money is always a big one for us single parents. These things above are the blessings I count everyday and occasionally one or two more get into the collection.

I am sure everyone has something to add.

Carla

oh yeah ... one more...
the child support is flowing because I had it set up as an IDO and he has no skills to work under the table.

Here's my positives

Back in December I found a babysitter that was more than willing to help me out. She took my 5 yr old daughter to and from preschool and all she asked was for me to bring milk and cereal or some food for the girls. She also charges me only for the days the girls are there. She is a wonderful and beautiful person. Plus she is a Christian. And she has blessed me so much by helping me out but also because she told me that she felt God has spoke to her to help me out. The same time I had been praying so that I would make the right choice. That just made me realize how God is always with me even when he seems so far away. I cried when she told me that.

My daughter graduated preschool last Sat. It was such a wonderful and emotional moment. It's so hard to believe my baby isn't a baby anymore. She does so well and makes me so proud. They played the same music they play at high school graduation. That was so neat!
I have some pic's posted on thier website if any wants to see. But this would not have happened if the preschool had not helped me out. I was going to pull Lynsey out of preschool in Jan because work was so slow. But they told me they had a "grant" for her which would pay for the rest of her tuition. After the program was over we left shortly after and I forgot my camera. I went back later to pick it up and I had the chance to personally thank the director and everyone for helping me. I am glad I did forget my camera.

Health wise I am feeling better. I suffered with anxiety and fatigue since I was 20. I finally came across a book called "Eat Right for Your Type" by Peter D'Adamo. I lost 20 lbs in 6 weeks. I am back to the same wieght I was before I was pregnant. I have more energy to get thru the day. And now I usually can not sleep past 6 am! My anxiety is a lot less. I also quit smoking (going on 2 months now) I joined Curves and work out 3 times a week. I give credit to God for all this because I kept praying so that I could find a way to feel better cause I really wasn't enjoying life.

I filed for divorce at the end of March. We both had to complete a divorce class that basically talked about the stages the kids go thru during and after divorce and the parents should not talk about anything other than the best interests of the child/children. There was a sad moment during the class where they showed a drawing that an 8 yr old made where there was 3 parts to a broken heart. The one on the left had Dad written in it. Then Mom was on the right. And the child's name in the Middle. I had to fight tears. My daughter usually writes Mom, Dad, her name and her sister's name on paper. I don't talk about it much. My soon to be ex and I have been separated almost 2yrs now. Anyhow I am glad I finally filed and anxious to get it all done with. I wish it were different but he isn't going to change. He makes no effort to want to work things out. He parties instead. And I have grown closer to God thru all this. So I feel better off without him.

Life is a lot better now. Not perfect of course. That'll never happen. But I will always keep my faith in God. I have so much to be thankful for.

All4Mine - Good for you for asking for this kind of input!! Not only will it be encouraging to those reading, it makes the author take inventory...

Eight years ago, I was waiting tables to support the whole family prior to the separation. Rentals were sky high! I took a long shot on buying. My realtor (and the Good Lord) found a great place for me any my then 3- and 6-year old to buy. (My mortgage for this 1800+ sq ft townhouse is $600/mo)

No child support. Went back to school. Used student loan $$ to help ends meet. Got my Bachelor's degree in nursing.

Child support enforcement activated - GREAT THING!! Could count on that check now. Then he started working under the table - no $$ from him. But the Lord made him suffer. He couldn't pay any of his bills. Got himself a grown-up job this past year and the child support is back. In fact he's working two jobs (and is so tired. No sympathy from me. It's karmic justice) Very rarely (like twice), he even gives me extra $$. Amen.

Worked 2-3 jobs at a time (as a nurse), making big $$$. Married a loser who robbed me blind. Oh well- knew I was stronger without him and cut that short. He's long gone and the kids and I are doing better than ever.

Just finishing my master's degree. Looking for new employment, but all bills paid while working *just one job* (Whew!) Kids are healthy. Daughter has been on honor roll for the past 3 yrs. Son will be entering high school next year. He was accepted to the Math & Science Academy. It's public school, way-advanced program, and he will earn college credits in high school (already has H.S. credits in middle school)

There are dark times, but we keep it together and come out stronger and smarter in the end. I thank God for the strength my kids give me. Don't know where I'd be without them.

I'm thankful for the shelter we have, the cupboards full of food, the water we drink, my smooth-running car, the bills that are paid, the health we enjoy and the great love between us.

Hope your $$$ problems pass soon. That's one of the toughest - trying to squeeze blood from a stone. Blessings to you ~

quote:

Originally posted by All4Mine:
I'm 37 with bills flowing over and not very optimistic about OWNING my OWN home...Does anyone have anything inspiring to share....?

My credit sucked when I first left my ex. But I went to a credit counsellor through my bank and he went over my ratings and record and helped me lay out a game plan to straighten it out again. Now....three years later, I have my credit straight and within the next year or so, I'll probably be able to buy a home. It didn't happen overnight though, but it happened.

I also graduated from grad school last May. Took a couple of years to do plus the year and a half it took to complete the bachelor's. But I finally made it through and I am so glad that I did. It gave me a real sense of accomplishment.

Also, I am about to fly out to meet up with this terrific man I have been talking to online for 2 1/2 years now. We have met in person before, but not since we admitted having feelings for each other. This will be a special trip. It's been 6 years since I went out on a date.

Sense a theme here? Sometimes it takes a lot of time to wade through all the crap to get to the pony underneath. But the bottom line is that things don't stay tough forever and you'll come out at the other end stronger than you ever dreamed possible.

YOU'VE ALL MADE THIS MONDAY MORNING WONDERFUL. I PRAYED FOR ALL OF US AND EVERYTHING THAT WE AS SINGLE PARENTS HAVE TO ENDURE. YOU ALL WERE MY LIGHTHOUSE THROUGH THE HAZE THIS MORNING.

I READ ALL OF THE INPUTS AND BELIEVE ME, IT DOES HELP THE NEXT PERSON.

BY THE WAY, I WAS BUSY WITH MY BOYFRIEND THIS PAST SATURDAY...not that busy...LOLLLLLL, BUT DECIDED TO GO TO THE MAILBOX ON YESTERDAY AND THERE WAS A CHILD SUPPORT CHECK THAT I HAD NO IDEA WAS COMING...

He's always RIGHT ON TIME...!!!

CONTINUE POSTING ALL YOUR WONDERFUL VENTURES...ENCOURAGING EACH OTHER IS KEY....I will own my own home...

God Bless!!!!!

quote:

Originally posted by CarlaA:
[qb]All4mine,
I will share....
I do not own my own home ... but I did...I like the one I rent better and I can call the landlord when something breaks.
I got out of an abusive (mentally and emotionally) relationship and I am wiping the scars away (but will never forget them, because I will never let them be repeated!)
I do have a job ... although it is never enough money .. I love it, bitchy clients and all.
I can't afford the GAS this week lol.. none of us can!... but my car works!
I started back to school after 24 years and so far so good, I got a perfect A in the first class.
My daughter graduated to sixth grade with A/B honor roll and is entering the full time gifted program.
She also goes to live in camp for two weeks on the second of June ..... and it did not cost me a dime.... YAHOO!!!! .... vacation!
The electricity is on and so is the phone ... and I can create good meals from almost nothing.
The ex boyfriend ... the one I love and like .. is back in my life and it is a great thing.
I have my mother with me. She is my godsend and my friend.
We (my daughter, my mother and myself) are healthy again after having horrible bronchitis.

I do have to say ... there are many bad things surrounding us these days ... and money is always a big one for us single parents. These things above are the blessings I count everyday and occasionally one or two more get into the collection.

I am sure everyone has something to add.

Carla[/qb]

You're awesome and you had me lol this morning....

Thank you for blessing me!

quote:

Originally posted by Solo:
[qb]Here's my positives

Back in December I found a babysitter that was more than willing to help me out. She took my 5 yr old daughter to and from preschool and all she asked was for me to bring milk and cereal or some food for the girls. She also charges me only for the days the girls are there. She is a wonderful and beautiful person. Plus she is a Christian. And she has blessed me so much by helping me out but also because she told me that she felt God has spoke to her to help me out. The same time I had been praying so that I would make the right choice. That just made me realize how God is always with me even when he seems so far away. I cried when she told me that.

My daughter graduated preschool last Sat. It was such a wonderful and emotional moment. It's so hard to believe my baby isn't a baby anymore. She does so well and makes me so proud. They played the same music they play at high school graduation. That was so neat!
I have some pic's posted on thier website if any wants to see. But this would not have happened if the preschool had not helped me out. I was going to pull Lynsey out of preschool in Jan because work was so slow. But they told me they had a "grant" for her which would pay for the rest of her tuition. After the program was over we left shortly after and I forgot my camera. I went back later to pick it up and I had the chance to personally thank the director and everyone for helping me. I am glad I did forget my camera.

Health wise I am feeling better. I suffered with anxiety and fatigue since I was 20. I finally came across a book called "Eat Right for Your Type" by Peter D'Adamo. I lost 20 lbs in 6 weeks. I am back to the same wieght I was before I was pregnant. I have more energy to get thru the day. And now I usually can not sleep past 6 am! My anxiety is a lot less. I also quit smoking (going on 2 months now) I joined Curves and work out 3 times a week. I give credit to God for all this because I kept praying so that I could find a way to feel better cause I really wasn't enjoying life.

I filed for divorce at the end of March. We both had to complete a divorce class that basically talked about the stages the kids go thru during and after divorce and the parents should not talk about anything other than the best interests of the child/children. There was a sad moment during the class where they showed a drawing that an 8 yr old made where there was 3 parts to a broken heart. The one on the left had Dad written in it. Then Mom was on the right. And the child's name in the Middle. I had to fight tears. My daughter usually writes Mom, Dad, her name and her sister's name on paper. I don't talk about it much. My soon to be ex and I have been separated almost 2yrs now. Anyhow I am glad I finally filed and anxious to get it all done with. I wish it were different but he isn't going to change. He makes no effort to want to work things out. He parties instead. And I have grown closer to God thru all this. So I feel better off without him.

Life is a lot better now. Not perfect of course. That'll never happen. But I will always keep my faith in God. I have so much to be thankful for.[/qb]

Thank you for you inspiration...
We're all very strong women...Our stories prove this....

Faith has kept me.....

quote:

Originally posted by Ms. Parker:
[qb]

My credit sucked when I first left my ex. But I went to a credit counsellor through my bank and he went over my ratings and record and helped me lay out a game plan to straighten it out again. Now....three years later, I have my credit straight and within the next year or so, I'll probably be able to buy a home. It didn't happen overnight though, but it happened.

I also graduated from grad school last May. Took a couple of years to do plus the year and a half it took to complete the bachelor's. But I finally made it through and I am so glad that I did. It gave me a real sense of accomplishment.

Also, I am about to fly out to meet up with this terrific man I have been talking to online for 2 1/2 years now. We have met in person before, but not since we admitted having feelings for each other. This will be a special trip. It's been 6 years since I went out on a date.

Sense a theme here? Sometimes it takes a lot of time to wade through all the crap to get to the pony underneath. But the bottom line is that things don't stay tough forever and you'll come out at the other end stronger than you ever dreamed possible.[/qb]

What I've also read is that we all can find love again....Congrats to you on all those great accomplishments....You go Ms. Parker!!!!

Well here's all the blessings that I count that help me get thru the day.

I left an awful relationship 4 years ago with nothing to my name except my car and the clothes I was wearing. My ex refused to let me take my son, physically holding him over my head so I could not grab him. I was forced to turn my back and walk away not only from my abusive boyfriend, but my son as well. Fortunately, I got my son back after one agonizing week.

Starting with nothing, I scraped and scratched my way through life. I fought a bout of depression that tried to drag me down forever, making me quit both my jobs and lock myself in my house for two months afraid that the whole world was out to get me. I was so far down I thought I would never get out. I'd spend the days watching out the front window, in fear of Child Services or his father, or both, coming and knocking on my door to take my baby. I'd spend my nights lying awake in my apartment that had no furniture save for a lamp that someone gave me out of pity. One day I opened my fridge and realized that I had run out of food, not run low, not "nuthin good to eat" but literally, it was empty. I sat down and had myself a good cry, then, I put my pride aside and I went to the welfare office and I pretty much begged for their help.

That was the lowest I have ever been, and I never want to face that situation again. Today, I can look at my life with pride. My son is healthy and happy. He is so smart he blows me away sometime. He just turned 4 and he's been reading and writing for a few months now. He can count to 100 too. He is so charming and friendly with people, I'm so glad because I had worried that the rough start to his life would leave him socially stunted. He is talkative and cheery, and can remember anyones name after being told only once. He has this way with people, he is going to be a con-artist or salesman one day, he can charm the pants off of anyone. Every time he smiles that great grin of his, I rejoice. He always seems to know when mommy needs a hug and is perfectly willing to oblige. He is my sunshine.

I worked my tail off, starting at entry-level pay (the same pay that people in fast-food restaurants or gas stations make) I worked tons of overtime and learned everything I could through the course of several jobs in order to get the one I have now. My current job is fantastic, I feel like it was made just for me. I never went to school to learn accounting, but thru a lot of work and a lot of budgeting I made it thru and now I make enough to support me and my son by myself. I now feel relaxed knowing that anything my son could possibly need, materialisticly, I can prvide for him.

Amazingly, dad does pay child support, but only because it is taken from his check and he can't stop it. His dad does take him every weekend, but we're going to be changing that pronto because my son will be enrolling in school and I don't want him taking off every single weekend. He needs to have more stability than that. While trying to teach my son right from wrong is difficult with daddy de-programming everything I work for (like at my house my son is completely potty trained, but at dads he still wears diapers *sigh*). I've come to a form of acceptance that dad is going to make this difficult for me, and that's okay, because in the end, I know my son will realize all the obsticals that his dad put in front of me and he'll appreciate all I've done. I realize this won't happen for 30 or 40 years, but I can wait. My son is smart and he will figgure it out.

After being alone for three years, I met a wonderful man. We've recently moved in together and I couldn't ask for more in a partner. He takes such good care of me and my son. He tells me every day that I am beautiful and he's always saying how lucky he is to have found me (if only he knew it's ME that is lucky to have found HIM!).

I look at my life now and I shake my head to make sure I am not dreaming. Instead of spending my days peering out the front window in fear and shame, I go off to work in my office as an accountant and crunch numbers all day. (Oddly, crunching numbers makes me happy, don't ask, only another accountant will understand lol) Instead of going to sleep on the floor of an empty apartment not able to sleep, I curl up next to the love of my life in our bed in our beautiful house. (we rent, but it's near impossible to buy a house where we live, and in my opinion, I'd rather call a landlord to fix my toilet than a plumber) My son is happy and for the first time in his life, he has his OWN ROOM! You would not believe how proud he is of that, it's hilarious when he stands at the door and waves his hand inside saying "Won't you come in?"

It took me YEARS and a lot of work to get where I am, but it is all worth it. So if you are down in the dumps and you think that it'll never get better, just remember, when you hit rock bottom, there is only ONE WAY TO GO!! and thats UP!

Luv ya guys!

All4mine,
Thank you for adding this discussion. It was much needed and yes it lifts all our spirits.
I returned last night after a weekend with 24 rising 6th graders(I am exhausted!. Let me tell you I was really not looking forward to it. I got a very nice suprise .. they were so great!!! All of us parents got such great feed back from everyone we encountered about what a wonderful group of children we had, the hotel was so accomodating and so were the people at the Tampa Aquarium and Busch Gardens.
I had a nasty fall on the way down in the restroom at a rest stop. Landed all my weight (I am a big girl) on my knee. I was so upset, it started swelling and I thought it was going to ruin it for my group. Well I am ok, they pushed me around in a wheel chair all day at Busch Gardens .... my group (8 of us) got to the front of most of the lines. They all said at the end of the day, I am sorry you hurt your knee, but I am happy you were in a wheel chair.. lol.
My blessing... I had a great time with my daughter and her friends this weekend! That says a lot for the children!
Thanks again All4mine!
Carla