Hi, new here and looking for some advice.
I am currently living with my boyfriend in an apartment in his parents house. We have a 5 year old together. I have wanted to leave him for a few years now because he does not want to get married and has cheated on me (twice that I know of). When I bring up the subject of leaving (with my son)he threatens me with custody - and so do his parents!!
I have been a stay at home mom, and my boyfriend has made sure that I only have enough money for basic necessities. when I bring up going back to work (since my son has started school) He and his parents make every effort to give me reasons why I cant or should not go to work. My son and I are very close because I have been home to take care of him. His father is always out day/night because he is in the entertainment field. With my financial situation being what it is, I could go to my mother's until I get on my feet but I live in NY and mom lives in NJ.
I guess I was looking for advice on .......how much "right" does he and his family have to take custody away from me and can they say anything about us going to NJ and/or my financial situation? If there is a chance that I could loose my son....... I will just stay where I am, put up and shut up!
thanks to anyone who will help!!

Hi Mom21Gr8guy,
Welcome to our little corner of the world. Please stay. There are a lot of great people with a wealth of advice, knowledge and support.
I suggest your first step should be to seek out legal advice from a licensed professional in your local area. It would be unwise of us to offer absolute legal advice here. You can do this through many help services in your area at little or no cost to you. Check the yellow pages.
Are you trapped? NO. But are you ready for the issues that will arise if you choose to leave? You may surprise yourself with your untapped inner strength. We all have it. If you decide to leave, then don't do it secretly unless you are in immenent danger. This could be perceived as a form of abduction. Make your intentions clear. If you are being physically blocked, ask for police assisstance.
I would say the father has legal rights to the child but with you being the primary care giver, it is unlikely you will lose custody. That of course will be up to a judge.
As for your financial situation, it is common for separating parents to be in your boat. It shouldn't be an issue unless you are unable to provide for your child. From what you say this doesn't appear to be the case.
Check the yellow pages and seek advice from the pros. Good luck and stay in touch. We're here to help.

Mom21, welcome to the site.
jaydsday has already said it well.
Don't let them control your decisions, you don't have to put up with someone that is cheating on you. To me it seems they don't want you working so they can keep trying to control you. Do what you need to do for you. The odds of you keeping custody I would think are good, and you can file for child support at the same time.
Definitely seek that legal advice on moving out of state, explaining you will have your mom's support that way.
Good luck

Your local child support agency might be able to offer some free advice, most of them are very sympathetic to women in your situation. I'm so sorry you feel trapped.

How are you getting internet access? Can he check you history files? Delete them after you go offline.

You are so lucky that your mother is willing to help you. I wish my mom would have done the same for me and Jack.

Don't give up, there are so many people here who can support you, and give you the advice you need. You might even make some new friends.

Try this link..

click here.

Sounds to me his family and him dont want to see you do it on your own and control you.
You have good advice here already.

Good luck and best wishes

Thanks to all of you!! I didn't expect such a quick response!! Excellent advice from everyone.
I guess there is no "sure thing" when it comes to all this custody stuff and I will have to find out what my options are. It is true that I am in a very controlling situation.......and I'm not sure I want to stir up something that could cause me to lose the most important thing in my life - my son! That would kill me!! I rather stay in this misery than risk all that!! Thanks for the advice on deleting my internet history, I didn't think about that ......and he would check!!