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Board Member |
What do you think is an acceptable relationship in the eyes of God?
I always try an use the checklist in 1 Cor. 13:4 -Love is patient -Love is kind etc; do you believe that those type of relationships still exist? The Bible says that He that findeth a wife , findeth a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. Does this mean that a woman is not supposed to pursue a man but wait and allow them to pursue you? What would you ideal Godly relationship be like? Are you trusting God for this to happen? Do you sincerely believe in your heart that it will? Liberty by the way...I posted a topic in 30-something...I'm 29 oops |
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"Brunette in training" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
All I can say is that everytime I have pursued something I wanted without hearing form God, it has been a disaster.
I have come to decide that I wouold rather live alone but with God and pleasing God than to live with someone and distance myself from God. So to answer your question, no, I do not think a woman should pursue a man. Yes, I am trusting God that what ever happens, my life glorifies Him. I believe in my heart that if God intends for me to marry, if I am in His will, I will. the Bible also talks about certain kinds of wives being a curse to their husbands and I would rather wait on the Lord so I can be a blessing to someone than to take the one I think is right and end up being a curse.LOL |
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"Forever" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
Not sure if that is what you are implying, but NO, from what I have heard of God (all second hand info), He would never give us the advice to be passive. A lady can do a little 'helping' for him to find her, can't she ?   |
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"Board Blazen Parent" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
Hi Liberty and welcome.
You have a pretty loaded question. Yes, I believe that those relationships are still out there. I also believe that they are somewhat made by us. Just like your relationship with God it is what you make it. I was married for 17 years and for the most part had a great relationship, but there were hard times too. That's where the patience comes in. I actually asked my husband out for the first time. It was the first time I ever did anything like that and am glad that I did. I don't think he would have gotten enough courage to ask me out. It just needs to be done with respect just like you would want it done. I think a truly Godly relationship would be as honest as you can be and doing the best that you can with what you have. That is all that God asks. This is a great way to do anything in your life. As far as God giving that to me again I don't know. I know that I am not there yet, but it is not ruled out of my mind. I love my husband with all my heart and soul. When he died a part of me did too. I also know that God has his reasons and that I will be and am okay. If there comes a time when someone else enters my life God will make it so. I don't know if this answers your questions or not but I am trying to be honest on how it is in mine. |
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Board Member |
tomany2count;
Thank you for the welcome and thank you for your answers. You know how you ask questions that you already know the answers to. sometimes you just need encouragement or just to hear it from someone else. I am sorry to hear of your loss. God allows us to go through so many different challenges in life. at the time we have no idea what He's doing (that's what makes Him God) and when He finally shows us (whenever that it..) we understand it so much better. I encorage single moms desiring a mate all of the time. I just don't have the same level of encouragement to give to myself. Me daughter even prays for a dad. She knows how to contact her dad but he's an arrogant flake and she sees it and therefore really doesn't want dealings with him. I also know that God is not going to have me look backwards. you know what's funny? I know that i am not ready for marriage because I am still in the process of becoming whole but I just want to know that I won't be a lonely, struggling, single mom forever. Know what I mean? God Bless you Liberty |
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On the Board |
Liberty,
Everything that your saying makes sense. I know that God created man and woman and He created marriage. I also know that He has His own time-table. I struggle with this often because it has been my dream, my hearts desire to be with a Godly man, to have a Godly marriage and a family that focuses on Him. I do get impatient, but it's those times that God gives me grace. I feel like I'm a mold of clay and God is the potter. He continually molds me and shapes me into a Godly women in which He will someday (in His time) bring me that Godly man. A partnership that focuses on God Himself. I feel exactly what your feeling. |
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Board Member |
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Board Member |
Hey BecsMom:
Thank you as well for understanding. Have you ever heard the saying "Before God sends you a mate, satan will send a counterfeit?" I've seen so many people end up with a fake because they refuse to wait on the Lord. To be honest if it weren't for God refusing to allow me to mess up, I would have ended up with one as well. I desire a man who loves the Lord as much as I do. A man who can take on the responsibility as the covering that he is supposed to be. One who is not selfish. A man who is repentant and not proud. A man who can pray for us (my daughter and I ) and with us. One who measures up to the 1 Cor. 13:4 check list. I have to remember though that I am still in the process of becoming whole in Christ. I have to remember that I still have baggage and mistrust for men and it wouldn't be fair to make a God sent, anointed man of God pay for what another man has done. So I am constantly asking God to make me into the woman that He has called me to be, and to show me what areas of my life need to be changed. One day you and I will both have a testimony about God blessing us with the family life that we desire. He says...if we delight ourselves in Him, He will give us the desires of our hearts. God Bless Liberty |
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"Doin' It Big" Active Board Parent |
All I know is that when i didn't listen to God, I got myself into a lot of trouble. Now, I am just waiting for the Lord to send me messages and I sit and listen. I have changed my ways greatly, but have a long way to go. With the Lord I know I will make it.
As far as relationships, I need someone who believes in God as much as I do and has no problem with attending Sunday services, isn't scared by the fact that I am Catholic, and will raise my child (any future childre) to be God fearing. |
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"Brunette in training" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
I have been thinking about this a lot since you posted... I think the question I would ask is....does this type of love reside within you? If it does, or it is something the Lord is working out in you, you have to believe that God also works the same in others. This is how I see the "dating" aspect of christianity and this is my opinion only and has ben formed by what I have read, studied in the word, and seen with my own eyes. Ultimately, I want to marry someone God has confirmed is one he approves of for me. I have seen many women tell a man that God told them he is the one they will marry. Although I do believe God has spoken this way historically it did not happen often. Common sense tells me I want my husband a father of my children to be a spiritual leader for my family and that means that he hears from God himself. Like with Moses, God spoke to his wife about the circumcision of his son only when Moses himself did not listen to God. If I hear from God, then I should trust that God would also say the same things to my future husband. If God is not speaking to him then I don't want him as the spiritual head of my family because that either means he is not a christian, not in the word enough, not listening, or worse yet hearing but not obeying. I am longwinded but have been studying up on this for close to 5 years now so I have a lot to say (and a lot I did not post LOL) |
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Board Member |
Hey PITA..
yes, that type of Godly love resides in me. I 've finally come to realize that everyone is not as loving or giving as I am and I say that by allowing the wrong types of people in my life. In addition I wanted to know how you all felt about the questions. The statement that you made about the man hearing from God, not being in his Word enough or not being obedient ...girl give me a Hi-Five!! I couldn't agree with you more. My daughters father was that way and then he allowed selfishness, the pride of life, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes to sway him in another direction. It's awesome that God made marriage as a physical sign to express His love for us. At least that is what it is supposed to be. The true meaning has been so twisted and distorted that it's not even funny. I am however, reminded that we walk by faith and not by sight. That faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Liberty |
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"Brunette in training" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
I have found that many times I miss the mark when it comes to the Corinthian standard of love. sometimes I do boast, sometimes I have envied, sometimes I have not been patient....
BUT: "Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ" Philippians 1:6�(King James Version) This reminds me that not only am I a work in progress but others are also a work in progress. The standard for telling if someone is christian to begin with is this: If they are not continually being changed, they are not allowing God's hand to move in their lives. In short, if nothing about you changes or you are not provoked to change and are not doing it, you cannot call God your god. 1 Peter 1:14 As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. Luke 6:46 �Why do you call me, �Lord, Lord,� and do not do what I say? |
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"Board Blazen Parent" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
Pita I am glad to see the comment about being a work in progress. It reminds us that we and others are not perfect. I have seen so many people call themselves Christians yet they judge others so greatly and forget that they are not yet finished.
Acceptance is such a great part of being Godly and having a great relationship with him and others. If we can not accept ourselves and the mistakes we have made it can make it difficult to accept others. We all have a place in this world and our chores to do. |
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Board Member |
I agree with you again.
I am no where near perfect. My only perfection is Christ. I am a yielded vessel for Him. I remember sharing with someone the fact that we life our hands and say "yes Lord...I'll go where you want me to go, do what you want me to do etc...." and when God shaped us for the task we get upset. (We meaning me) I know the call the God has placed on my life. I've known it for years. I have an idea of what type of lifestyle God has for me, I've known this too. It's just allowing God to prepare me is what get's uncomfortable. Regardless of what I've been through and trust me it has been a lot...I thank God that He chose me and that I made the choice to live for Him. I just shared that Phil. 1:6 with someone else a few hours ago. The bottom line is that we don't have to be perfect (because living in this corrupt world we never will be). We just need to be willing to allow God to take our imperfections and somehow use them for His glory. The same with the mates that He blesses us with. Whose to say that it won't start as a friendship with someone you never thought would be the man chosen for you. whose to say that this friend may be saved but needs to re-dedicate his life to Christ and Christ uses to you lead him in that direction. We just never know. We just have to trust that God knows what he is doing. 1Cor. 2:9 Eyes have not seen, nor ears have not heard nor has it entered into the heart of man, the things which God has prepared for those who love Him. Our testimonies are going to be so great that posting them on this site will not be good enough. Liberty |
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