I would like to apply for state assistance for child care, because I really can't afford it on my own. My daughter's father was in prison for the first 8 months of her life, is violent, and doesn't have a steady job. My mother told me if I apply the state will go after the father for the money and grant him visitation rights regardless of the above factors. Does any one know if this is true, or has anyone had a similar experience?

The thing that is true is they will go after him for reimbursement of state aid paid.
The unsure part is whether he would get visitation or not, it is a separate issue. If he asks/fights for it you have the opportunity to present your side as well. His record, any documented proof of violence-police reports etc., his living situation and then the judge will decide on visitation. Even supervised visitation is a possibility. No gaurantees on the visitation outcome one way or the other until it goes in front of the courts.

The only aid that has to be paid back is welfare, or AFDC. Subsidized child care does not have to be paid back, and so the father will not be notified. I know because I had subsisized child care (and still do) and dad doesn't pay back any of it. The only time they went after him was when I applied for emergency aid and welfare sent me some money, a one time thing, THEN they went after him for the money. Oh yeah, and if you want the Medi-Cal or Medicaid, they might go after the father. As far as custody, he has to ask for it, as far as I know. No one is going to go and file a custody hearing for you or him. You don't have to worry about welfare or state aid doing that, because they don't care about custody, they just want their money back. I think what your mom means to say is if you file for state aid, they might go after the dad for the money, and that might prompt HIM to seek custody. If you don't think he will try for custody, then you don't have to worry.

That's actually interesting that the subsidized child care is done different than AFDC or medicaid. I thought it was handled the same way, since it's state funds, but learned something today Thanks for clarifying that Sera.

Thank you for all the replies. May I ask, what is AFDC?

AFDC (Aid to Families with Dependant Children) was the previous name of the current government program, TANF (Temporary Aid to Needy Families). It's when you get actual cash assistance, as opposed to foodstamps, daycare subsidy, etc.

What Seraphin said is true, they don't require the non-custodial parent to repay the state for daycare subsidy, foodstamps, etc. Only when you recieve an actual check do they force repayment. However, when I applied for daycare assistance, I think I remember having to fill out a form that stated that I agreed to establish paternity and begin child support proceedings if it wasn't already established. You might want to check it out.

If he was violent towards you or the child, and you have proof (police reports, restraining order, etc) you may be able to get that requirement waived.