Ok...you single parents of "Girls" out there, single dad in need of advice here.

So my nearly 13yo DD, Lauren had her 1st visit from "her monthly friend" tonight....thank goodness it was BEFORE going to bed.
... and so, between myself and her older sister ( my oldest DD, 20yo) we kept her pretty calm and got her the necessary things late from the grocery store including "Blue Bunny Ice Cream" (A fantastic suggestion by a pretty SFV family member who shall remain nameless, thank you ) ...

... and so we talked for just few minutes about the obvious, symptoms and things she would be experiencing as she progressed through this week. She is both VERY excited ( happily) and scared.
... and we will be talking more tomorrow....So with that in mind, "Dad" (that's me) needs to explain..without freaking her out ...what exactly is happening...as Mom has not been able to do that succesfully...(as she thinks this is a horrible thing only)at least according to Lauren.

.... Bearing that in mind...what would you ladies suggest I NOT say? ( and yes, this is open for the "Dads" of young ladies, as well)

I don't believe in beating around the bush so I'd start by not calling it her "friend" or "the red enemy" or anything silly like that. I think it implies the its something you cant say. Be honest tell her there will be times she'll wish she didn't have to have it but that it really is a beautilful thing. Dont make it this secret we have to whisper about but don't take her out to dinner and announce it to everyone either. (although a daddy and me dinner would be nice) Other than that tell her the truth good and bad. Make sure she understands she is preparing to possiably be a mother one day having a baby grow inside of her if she wants, how lucky she is to have that choice and how wonderful that is is to be a woman. Its late and I'm running out of suggestions but I may be back tomorrow with more. It sounds like you've got it together pretty well anyway.

That is exactly what I was told....

wow your moms were deep

My mom just taught me how to put a napkin on my panty so my pants wont stain LOL

Well, she did warn me though beforehand that I was about to have my first menstruation, and she told me to tell her if it ever came. That's why i wasnt really scared because I already expected it when it came. So when it did, she just demonstrated the napkin routine. That's just about it.

Paul......yep, I've been there/done that. Um....only my daughter was younger I somehow knew it was coming, I guess already having had to take her bra shopping helped me clue in. But anyway, I had talked to her about it beforehand and even stocked the bathroom with supplies just a few months before it happened. I tried to keep it as simple as possible, and just stuck with the basic facts. As already suggested the less "taboo" this is made out to be the better, I just went with more of a "matter of fact" approach, it's just part of normally growing up and maturing. I did even have some pamphlets from our hospital for her to read, actually due to her age I proofread those and held out giving her one of them since it was a bit more advanced than I felt she needed to read at that time....she has since then been given that for us to review.
I would also imagine that she's already attended family life classes at school, or whatever they call it there. Maybe ask what they've talked about there as well so you can build your conversation from that also.
Oh, the things that us dads have to do that traditionally a mom would be handling But you are a very "in tune" dad and you'll do fine.

I learned by reading "Are You There God, it's Me, Margaret." Any other girls out there remember that book? lol

No, seriously, I got the same matter of fact talks from school and mom. I was terrified about sharing this information with Dad, though. We did not have a close relationship that would warrant discussions that involved such personal informatin like that. I'm so touched that you dads are doing such a great job with your little women.

And I love norma-jean's suggestions, including the special dinner.

Ok one more thing incase you didn't think of it be sure to ask her what her friends have told her already because girls can have very active imaginations and tend to exagerate. I remember someone telling me I'd have to go to the hospital everymonth to get a transfusion luckly I knew better but you never know what someone may have told her. kinda like the jumping up and down after "coffee" thing. Oh and don't forget how crazy her hormones are now. So get that bat out and be prepared (just kidding)

LOL ...transfusions...

Ok..thanks for your input guys...
Havent talked to her yet....need to get my day situated first.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Paul,

Just a thought, but it is a valid one.

I know that it is very much preferred that young girls use sanitary napkins, but in school's these days they require swimming classes. Make sure you let her know that your older daughter can instruct her on the use of tampons so that Lauren does not have to learn from another child in school. I was unfortunate in that situation that I sat in the regular gym class for a week embarrassed because my mother had not helped me with that topic. Also make sure that you cover changing napkins or tampons regularly to avoid infections.

I also liked this web sites advice on practical tips http://www.upmc.com/HealthManagement/ManagingYourHealth...dren/?chunkiid=46635

My little girl of 8 is already having mood swings....so I have a feeling she may be an early bloomer like her Dad's side of the family. I have a feeling our early talks are going to be happening over Christmas break.

luckily she's homeschooled....there's a lot of controlled variables...but thank you I will do as you instructed, B. I really appreciated that....didnt even think of it.

Ok...

So the talk went well....other than looks of disgust LOL

Questions anyone? LOL

She was relieved to find out she wasnt going to bleed to death. Poor kid...she said it was a whole lot better than what her mother told her.

I found some really good animations online that i used. You can find them here if you like.

http://www.howstuffworks.com/menstruation.htm
http://www.howstuffworks.com/menstruation.htm

and yes B, I did talk about the Tampons as well. She thought that was the grossest thing she ever heard...LOL

Good job Dad
Don't you wish we could just keep them young and innocent instead. But then I guess we wouldn't have them grown and mature to take care of us when we're old and feeble.

I dont plan on being old and feeble....old and "annoying" maybe.

This is one of biggest worries

I soooo hope I'm married and can pas the buck on this one when the time comes

Seriously ....those web links are more than even I want to know about myself. I just know that I'm good as long as it keeps showing up :P