sounds fun, i love camping, but kind of hard to rough it when you have to pee every 5 minutes and only have one position you can lay in which still hurts. im hoping to get back to it next summer when the baby is bigger. my parents camp but its in a trailer with amenities, i like the wilderness, no tv etc.

yeah...we are gonna do it in the back yard lol. dont think i could handle the peeing thing either. plus 3 kids is alot of work

This is the first time I have read this thread.
I am so glad so many have been posting to let you know that you are important and so is this child. Pregnancy hormones and a poor relationship is a a shaking a bottle of pop really hard. Explosion and messy.
I am sure you have so many emotions about your BF and are focusing back and forth on how to make him see what is important and what can be.
Huge hugs to you.
The best advice I can give is pray for him to grow. Pray for strength and change your focus.
It can help ease the emotions
Focus on yourself and baby and loving friends and family. If you focus on the good stuff than the crummy stuff doesn't;'t seem so bad and won't take over your life!
I certainly don't know it all. But I do know that all the years I spent trying to help my sons father develop and grow in a positive way was
wasted because he had no interest in evolving into a grown up.

Enjoy the backyard camp out.
It should be good fun and the house is right there if you need anything at all.

be well
Harmony

i dont get how guys can be so uncareing. he wont even answer my calls. if i was him i would be calling to ask how my soon to be kid is doing. UGH

well angel unfortunately thats how thy can be, my ex was the same way, they go hot and cold, so you can either accept that, or dont accept it. stop calling him and see if he calls, he knows you will call him. if i call my ex hes an *** but if i avoid him or act like i dont care hes calling me and making plans. i dont know whats going through your guys head, but try to back off and see what happens.

i talked to him today and all he did was yell at me and told me that he will give me 150 a month and that he didnt want to have any thing to do with me. i told him that i would just see him in 9 months at court and he said it wasnt his....can i get a court ordered paternity test?

Yes, yes, yes!!! The state of Virginia has laws for that look on the web under establishing paternity or something similar I live in florida and because my baby's father told me that he would refuse to take a paternity test I told him the law he immeadiately shut up about it if I am not mistaken he will be held in contempt of court and issued a warrant if he does not comply and I know he doesn't want that. You would be surprised the amount of men who try and dodge a paternity test because establishing paternity makes them accountable. Once paternity is established you can get a court order for child support. Just go to establishing paternity in virginia on your search engine and it will amaze you and rest your mind. I am long winded sorry this is so long.

so if i have to take him to court and he is proven to be the father does he have to pay for the test?

In Indiana - the answer is yes.

If the father requests paternity, he is responsible for paying for the test.

its not so much the money that i am concerned with as that i want my child to know who the father is. and if something were to happen to me or my parents i would want his mom to be able to see the baby. i love his mom to death

It is a tough situation u are going through! i was the same way with my ex! but, when i had the baby my ex's whole family didn't want anything to do with me or the baby! i know it is hard to deal with your soon to be child not having a father, but children the baby won't need him!!! I know you are going to do a btter job by yourself! moms can take on the role of both and be better than a 2 parent household! I was raised without a father, and my mom did a better job than any 2 parent family. I also am a single parent! ANd I know if my sons father was involved my son would never have a normal life since the dad does drugs and is a dead beat!!! I would wait untill he grows up! you have to decide what is best for and the baby!! i have much love for you and the baby and my heart is with you!!!!

Hi. I'm also new. I have gone through the same thing you have. I'm 19 years old and I have a wonderful 4 month old baby girl. My suggestion to you is to stop calling him. My baby's "dad" wanted nothing to do with the baby until I accepted that and stopped contacting him. Than HE started calling me everyday to find out how the baby was doing! He's not involved with Ally now but that's a different story. Just remember if you love something let it go and if it comes back than you know it's meant to be and if it doesn't work out then that means there is somebody MUCH better for you and your child out there!!!!

go to supportguidelines.com and click on your state. like ive told others its a great site and it will guide you as far as things go in your state in my state, you file a complaint for paternity and then the father is ordered into court and a paternity test is given, once it is established he is the dad then child support orders are put in place. 150.00 a week sounds more like the rate. the state doesnt
think to highly of dads that shirk their responsibility even though you may have to chase them for the $ i know even atthe hospital they give you the paperwork you may need if the father is "unknown" in MA unless you are married there is no legal father and the dad must sign a voluntary parentage form if not them you need to file for complaint for paternity.

ps do you have a good relationship with his mom? maybe you should talk with her or call her after the baby is born, im knid of up in the air about what my ex' family is going to do and how accepting they will be. they know, but i dont know if they wil want her around. I know his 13 yo daughter doesnt.

well guys alot has gone on. first i fell down my nextdoor neighbors stairs and hurt my foot. me and bryan arent talking anymore. im spending alot of time at my neighbors house watching their kids and hanging out with them. they are cool. hopefully things are starting toget better