I was planning to write a post in this section, but before I write what I wanted to write, I have to tell you, I am full of shock and joy. My 13 year old daughter just made me a hot breakfast for the first time. She decided she wanted some eggs and asked if I wanted some. She even made toast. Can you believe it. I asked if she was ploying me for something, but she said "no", just thought that she was going to make herself some (which also surprises me) that she would make me some. My fourteen year old, soon to be fifteen, daughter doesn't even know how to make eggs.
Now the topic I wanted to write: The other day my 14 year old daughter was being very mouthy and disrespectful, while her friend was here, so I was going to ground her for trick or treat night, but she moaned, so I gave her a choice. Trick or Treat night or the whole weekend including Friday night. She was supposed to go to 2 haunted events over the weekend. She chose the weekend. Of course, I heard about how mean I was, how she hated me and how she was going to live with Grandma. On top of this, I found out she was doing less than acceptable in one of her classes, she just started high school, and anything less than honor roll is unacceptable, because of her capabilities and her desire to be a doctor. Ever since we got DSL, my girls have been online and IMing incessantly. I know this has taken her time away from studying so I also laid down the law about a 2 hour daily limit online. Of course both girls got upset about that one. My 13 year old, couldn't understand why this had to affect her, since truthfully she'd done nothing wrong. I explained to her that I had not been comfortable about all the time spent online anyways and I wanted to break bad judgements now. I explained to her that the next few years would be tough for all of us as we went through the teen years. She seemed to accept that. Now to my point. A couple days after I laid down the law, I now have an amicable 14 year old. Her attitude is so much better than it has been for a couple of months. This tells me that it is true, teens do want boundaries. They just don't realize this themselves. If we leave them in control and don't realize when we need to step in and take control, they are at a loss and act out. I hope this gives all you parents so hope guidance and comfort. This probably will not be long lived, but I have decided to enjoy the moment, as I'm sure they may come few and far between.