I am a single father and I share visitation rights with my ex wife who happens to be Hispanic. This last month my son had gone to see her parents in Mexico. While down there it is my understanding that he started to hurt and even kill little animals. Has anyone seen this type of behavior? I started talking to my ex about it, which quickly turned to screaming and yelling mostly on my part due to her lack of astonishment over our sons behavior. I have never known any one to act like that. I was hoping to get some feed back on this particular subject. I am not a violent person by any stretch of the imagination, nor do I convey violence in upbringing of my son, but something happened in Mexico that turned him to doing that, or maybe it is just his age. I am not sure. Any suggestions?

Thanks

Hecksher,

Yes I have seen this and you have to get him into therapy with a behavioral counselor. My nephew was hurting animals and my brother (his dad) thought it was typical boy behavior. He was wrong. He is now 14years old, almost 15 and he is a hellion. I would not doubt for a moment that he is abusive towards animals still, if not people. My brother and sister-in-law are not violent people, they have never even spanked him. Kids do things that their parents would never do. We told my brother back then to get professional help and he didn't, and now regrets that. Your son could just be venting and doesn't feel he has a non-biased person to talk to. He wants to talk about/vent his anger and doesn't want to hurt mom or dad's feelings or make you angry with what he has to say about either one of you. Believe me he has his own thoughts on your seperation from his mom. Even as young as he is... he may even be blaming himself. He might be looking for attention.... even if it is negative. Get help to learn more. Pychologists will give you advice on what to say and do and give you a different perspective of how your son is feeling. Neither one of you may want to hear what is said, but if you love your son you must dig it up. Don't wait. You know the situation better than any of us, just try not to point the finger because it could just be you that he is angry with. You won't know until you get him someone to talk to (other than family)that he can vent to. Psycologists have a way of getting it out of a child, that the average person doesn't think to do. Also they will give you articles and advice to help you. I hope this helps, good luck and keep us posted.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by THINKER:
[QB]Hecksher,

Thanks and I will keep you posted.

quote:

Originally posted by hecksher:
[qb]I am a single father and I share visitation rights with my ex wife who happens to be Hispanic. This last month my son had gone to see her parents in Mexico. While down there it is my understanding that he started to hurt and even kill little animals. Has anyone seen this type of behavior? [snip] I have never known any one to act like that. I was hoping to get some feed back on this particular subject. I am not a violent person by any stretch of the imagination, nor do I convey violence in upbringing of my son, but something happened in Mexico that turned him to doing that, or maybe it is just his age. I am not sure. Any suggestions?

Thanks[/qb]

Thinker is right. Torturing and killing animals is an early warning sign that something might be very wrong. BUT...you need to find out exactly what it was he was doing and how. Kids that young don't understand that other creatures have feelings and that dead is dead, so sometimes they do cruel things like kill bugs or squeeze a small animal too hard. It doesn't neccesarily mean they're on the road to becoming a serial killer.

However, if he is hanging kittens or poking out the dog's eyes, or something like that, then yeah...that is extremely troubling. Are there any other behaviors that you find troubling, such as bed wetting or setting fires? Have you tried talking to HIM about it? At four, he should be able to tell you a lot.