2 yr old sons biological dad was an abusive boy friend physically and emotionally and a patholog ical liar -he was a superb liar, sometimes he didn't even realize he was lying. He has no idea he exists, i told him I was pregnant - told me to get an abortion as far as he's concerned I could ve or given him up for adoption. And I wan to keep it that way, i am ssssooooo afraid of while driving with son in car seat, or stroller. I am also afraid that my son will resent me in the future or want to see his father when he gets older. I don't want anything from him, he can keep the 3000 dollars he owes me. Tell me if this is fair - I don't work, go to college, live with my mom - son w/ me doing the best that I can, am on WIC, he gets medicare, and because I won't cooperate with them, protecting my son from his abusive father and give social services the biological dads info I'm being punished. I am not elligable for medical, I'm supposed to get $530 a month from welfare for me and my son, as punisment me and my son get $350 and $130 in foodstamps, and i'm not elidible for calworks - financial aid 4 college. I know grateful for what I have, but how is anyone supposed to live off that? If I tried to fight this I'd lose, didn't take pictures when the bruises were still fresh. Social services is wonderful for single parents who want to make the other responsible, but what about single mothers like me who need money, supprt - who don't want the significant other to know about the child, to protect their flesh and blood and get turned away punished for it. my nostrils are flaring as i write this im gettin so pissed. some 1 in similar situation, advice, or am I just crazy!?!

I am going through the same thing right now. My son is 3 yrs old. His dad is in Iraq now, so I haven't had to worry for a while. He was abusive towards me as well, and made many threats to steal my son away. I found out a lot of horrible things about his past that scare me to have him around our son. I am fortunate he has disappeared, but it still sucks to worry about these things everyday. I am sorry that you are going through this. One thing I am considering is trying to get his rights taken away. Have you considered that? When was the last time he say your son?

Oh my God steal ur son away! Thats not cool. The sons father has been to prison before. I am doing nothing illegal here, i informed of his son to be and he shut me down, after i am done with college my boyfriend and I plan on getting married and he alredy knows my bf as dad and his mom as grandma, after we get married an adoption idea motion has to be posted for 1 month in the newspaper and if no 1 reponds my bf will be his legal father. Fortunately my son has never seen his bio dad, how bout ur son

His father was around when he was a baby. He has only seen him once since he turned 1 yrs old, and he is now almost 4 yrs. old. He has made wierd attempts to see him, but I won't let him. My son sees his grandparents though on a regular basis. They help me out a lot. They do not have anything to do with my ex either. He was adopted and has had a lot of horrible things happen to him before, but that is not my sons fault, and I would rather my son grow up happy and healthy before his father is introduced if ever.

your son Sees ur exs parents? My sons bio dad was taken awayfrom his incompetant mother by and raised by grandparents. I feel a little bad - his grandmother told me that she would like to see her great grandchild - oh well. I look back at the relationship i don't know what was true and what was false - lied about being a wrestler at stanford, says he has a twin bro, lied about being sterile, said that his father was in the italien mofia and that I could never meet his father cause i was asian, i am such an idiot for having anything to do with him. in way u r lucky he lives 15 min away from me, and I ran into him at a club news yrs a yr ago he tried to approach me i was having none of it, I was with my boyfriend and his friends, he wasn't going to try anything. When i was with him i was his prisonior - i couldn't go 2 clubs - no trust, i hate him cheated constantly, my car was his car, tried to leave, extremly disrespectful. he works 10 min away frm my house. that fear of running into him is always there

Yeah, that sucks he is so close. Did he ever mention your son on either of those times you ran into him? Is he on the birth certificate? I know that someday he will not consume most of your thoughts and feelings. It just takes time. Sounds all too familiar to my ex-husband. I am happy that you are away from him now. You deserve much more in your life than to deal with a negative person like that, and so does your son. It sounds like you made the right choice. Good for you!!

many thanks. He is totally in the dark about our child. I consider him the sperm donor. No way, putting him on the birth certificate would make him accountable in some way, the space under father is blank so when my boyfriend and I get married he will be able to adopt my son, no contesting, having to get extra signatures - fingers crossed knock on wood.

That is a good thing. I hope all works out okay. If you ever need to you can PM me.