My daughter is almost 10 months old and she won't fall asleep by herself. (I know its my fault for getting that habit started) I have to hold her or lay next to her and let her hold my finger to fall asleep. Then when I lay her down by herself she wakes up a lot more frequently than if she were next to me. How do I break this habit?

I went through the same thing with my first child. I had to break the habit cold turkey. She cried a lot and I hated hearing it but after awhile she stopped crying when it was time for bed and actually started going to bed without me asking her to. Does she take naps in the day?

Yep the best, fastest, most effective way is to just cut her off cold turkey. It will break your heart to hear her cry, but if you don't you will be doing this until she's a teenager! Try getting a bedtime routine down, play some soft music for her. I also read that if you warm the bed with a hot water bag, they go to sleep easier.

This is a hard thing to do definitely. My son is almost 4 and sometimes he still wants me to lay in bed with him before he falls asleep. We compromise-We snuggle for about 5 minute and then I tell him I need to go. I just had to start bargaining with him. I'll snuggle with you, but it can only be a few minutes and then I need to go to my own bed. Now obviously, this is easier to do with a 3 year old than a 10 month old! It was hard for me when my son was younger because I cherished the time at night when I got to sit in his dark room, rocking him in the rocking chair while he fell asleep. People say not to do it because they get dependent on it, but I absolutely loved that quiet alone time with him.

If you really want to break the habit though, people are right. You're going to have to let her cry. It'll be a lot of not so restful nights, but it will get better. With my son, if he wakes up and wants to get in bed with me I usually just reassure him, "Mommy's right next door. You need to sleep in your own bed." I'll get up, give him a big "snuggle hug" as we call it and a kiss and then he's fine. I don't necessarily agree with letting a child cry alone in their room...peek your head in there, tell her you love her and give her a kiss. I know she might not understand fully but seeing that you're still around will make it easier. At least in my experience.

Good Luck

Not that this is particulalry healthy.......
but when my son was little he would only fall asleep by himself when watching TV. Usually a cartoon and a comfy place to curl up and watch it followed by a show boring enough to make him snooze.

Thanks for all the advice. SchoolMommy, yes she does take naps during the day. About every 3-4 hours for 1/2hour to 1 and 1/2 hours.

Have you ever added up how much she sleeps in total, per day ? + during the night ?
It might be worth checking and then trying to get her to respect another chosen schedule.
Maybe, her total of sleep hours during the day is just too high for her now.
Before you start the hard way (=letting her cry), I would make sure she's actually tired enough (a little more tired than usual, but not too much either...that's hard to time).
I used to make a sleep/cry/meals plan for my son, for a week or so: draw the hours of the day from 0h to 24h on a line, put /// when she cries, ---- for when she sleeps, oo for each meal, o for a snack. Do that for a few days, then make calculate the average sleep hours per day. It's one line per day, a new line for a new day. That way, if her schedule is constant, the symbols end up at the same column...hope this is not too confused of an explanation. PM me if you want, any time.
Daniela

Yes, making sure they don't sleep in or take too-long naps helps. But the best thing is too wean her while shes a baby. When my now 14 yr old son was a baby, I let him sleep with me for like a week when his dad went out of town, after his dad came back, I couldn't get him to stay in his crib. One night he cried so much the neighbors called the police! I had to let them in to see him , and by then he was asleep, soon I had no more problems with him. Now though, I have a 5 yr old who always sleeps with me. We got into the habit since I've pretty much been single since I had her, so it don't bother me too much, plus shes my baby (won't be having any more!) Still, sometimes it annoys me if I have guests over at night or I am not sleeping with her, she automatically gets up to find me and sleep with me. I know she has to grow out of it one day, but believe me, it's easier to get them used to sleeping alone while they are babies, so good luck and let us know how it goes.

I made the same mistake with both of my kids and sadly cold turkey is the way to go. With both kids I had soft music playing in their rooms. One key thing is that nap time and bed time need to be the same time every day. Good luck you will enjoy when bed time comes around and she doesnt fight with you. It took mine about a week!