By Andrew Quinn


SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - The traumatic effect of divorce hits many children
decades after their parents separate, hobbling them as they seek to form
close family relationships of their own, according to a study released
Tuesday.

``Our findings challenge the myth that divorce is a transient crisis,''
Judith Wallerstein, a senior lecturer emerita at the University of
California-Berkeley and author of the study, said.

``We now see that the major hurt is in adulthood, when internalized images of
the mother, father and their relationship come to center stage and shape the
choices their grown children make,'' she said.

Wallerstein's findings are being published in a book, ``The Unexpected Legacy
of Divorce: a 25 Year Landmark Study'' published by Hyperion of New York and
coauthored by Julia Lewis, a professor of psychology at San Francisco State
University, and Sandra Blakeslee, a science writer for the New York Times.

Her work is based on a study of about 100 San Francisco Bay-area children
that began in 1971, and is believed to be the first research of its kind to
follow the children of divorce into adulthood.

For the 25-year follow-up, Wallerstein also interviewed a group of 44
children from intact families who grew up alongside the children of divorce
and attended the same schools.

By comparing the life experiences of the two groups, the study concludes that
parental divorce has a profound and lasting impact on the emotional lives of
children, which is felt most acutely in their own adult relationships.

The children of divorce experienced lives fraught with pitfalls ranging from
crippling fears of loss and disaster to greater use of drugs and alcohol
during youth. They also had fewer marriages, fewer children, and more
divorces than the children from intact families, the study showed.

While most children of divorce do eventually conquer their difficulties and
lead normal lives, they make more mistakes along the way, Wallerstein said.

``This is very important because it's about one-quarter of the population,''
Wallerstein said in an interview. ``And it's important to note that these
divorces have a very specific impact: it doesn't affect their work life, it
doesn't affect their academic achievement, but it does affect their
relationships as man and woman.''

The study revealed that, when interviewed as adults, just 60 percent of the
children of divorce were married compared to 80 percent of children who grew
up in intact families.

About 38 percent of the divorce survivors had children, and 17 percent of
them were out of wedlock. By contrast, 61 percent of the individuals in the
``intact families'' group had their own children, and all of them were in the
context of marriage.

The children of divorce were much more likely to marry before the age of 25
-- half compared with just 11 percent of the comparison group -- and were
also much more likely to get divorced themselves. A full 57 percent of their
early marriages ended in collapse, compared with 25 percent of the early
marriages in the comparison group.

Divorce was also seen having an impact in other areas of life. Only 29
percent of the children of divorced parents were helped financially by their
fathers in pursuing a higher education, compared to 88 percent of the
children from intact families.

And 25 percent of the children of divorce reported using drugs and alcohol
before age 14, compared with just nine percent of the comparison group.

Wallerstein said it was clear from her study that the younger the children
are when a divorce occurs, the more harm they experience. But she added that
she did not advocate that couples stay together for the sake of the children,
no matter what their marriage is like.

``In extreme cases a divorce can be better for children if one of the parents
can turn her or his life around and serve as an example,'' Wallerstein said.

She added that other ameliorating factors -- such as the strong presence of
grandparents, and continued nurturing by both divorced parents -- could also
make for a less damaging process. ``But it's very tough for these kids, and
it obviously takes a long time to recover. Some of them have simply never
seen a man and a woman on the same beam.''

REUTERS@

20:28 09-05-00

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