HEY MY SON WONT SLEEP. HE ONLY SLEEPS IN HIS CRIB AT NIGHT FOR A LITTLE WHILE. IM LOSING SLEEP OVER THIS! I CHOSE TO HAVE HIM SLEEP WITH ME I KNOW BUT I NEED HIM TO MOVE OVER INTO THE CRIB. I HAVE IT RIGHT NEXT TO MY BED BUT HE SPENDS MOST OF THE NIGHT WITH ME. EVEN NAPS ARE SPENT IN MY ARMS TO HAVE HIM SLEEP LONG ENOUGH... PLEASE HELP

It sounds like you have gotten him used to the holding and sharing of your bed. Some suggestions could be giving your son a pacifier and rubbing his back while he is in his bed. I always tried to have my babies lye on thier side by using a pillow. And I have heard that a pillow shouldnt be used but I did. I tried to find what kept them comfortable.

And as far as what studies say they do provide good info but what works for one doesnt always have the same effect for another. I would never let my babies cry for long periods of time or constantly. Sometimes crying for awhile may help them fall asleep too. And I don't think that one day you should just suddenly leave him in his crib to cry it out. Maybe just try to get him to fall asleep by laying him down, talking to him, giving a pacifier, keeping your hand on him so that way he knows your there and if you are persistant your work will pay off.

Well I hope that whatever you decide works for you soon! I know how you feel! I have been through many sleepless nights.

I had the same problem, well sorta. My daughter didn't really sleep with me but in the same room. she would wake up 5-6 times a night and I would have to feed her. My doctor told me to not pick her up when she cried but instead to stand over her crib and rub her back for a few and leave the room again. She said it was going to be harder on me then on her. About half way through the night I almost gave in a fed her, but I thought that I was this far into it that if I turn around now I would just have to go through this all over again. I was lucky and it only took her one night and she slept through after that, but it make take several nights for you. Just try your best and if you slip up you are still a good mom. it will all fall into place in good time. As long as you keep going in the room they know that you are still there. I am just saying that this worked for me so it may not be the formula for you, you can always ask your doctor for advice. Good luck and keep us informed. Jayme

I to made the same mistake by putting my last child Destiny in my bed instead of a baby bed. Destiny is 6 yrs. old now and has her own bed but, at times she still wants to sleep with me. I never put Destiny in a crib she would wake up every 2 hrs. I would breast feed her and she would go back to sleep. I found that a pacifier calmed her down and she would fall asleep but, that to became a nightmare because one night she lost her pacifier at my moms house and I had to go to Walmart at Midnight to get a nuk the only kind she would take because she would not stop crying. I also started keeping extras around and cliped it to her clothes.
Maywest

What we used to do when my son did not sleep during the day, we went for long walks, and he would sleep no problem. And when I needed to do something, I went for a walk around the block and then left him in the pram to sleep. At night I often nursed him 3 times and more. I decided to leave him to sleep in my bed those nights, because it was too tiresome to always get up, and we would sleep fine after he was fed. I still believe it was no mistake. That first year is really hard. But it does get better. And if you wean them earlier it will get better earlier too. But I'm glad we didn't do that. If you're breast feeding, that might be one of the reasons he sleeps less well. But it's worth it I think.

bear,

You should really make sure that there is no medical reason for this behavior. Things like acid reflux and other digestive problems can be the cause. These things usually show up at sleep time. A 4.5 month old is not able to soothe himself yet so rocking and holding him while he falls asleep is ok and as far as getting him used to sleeping with you, �spoiled�, my pediatrician said that I had until the 6th month before I would start developing sleep habits like that. ** I know every child and pediatrician is different and that is your call; it is just what I was told. ** He certainly may be used to the warmth/security of sleeping with you but his own bed and/or room should be able to provide that kind of security too. You may want to examine issues like the temperature of his mattress when you lay him down, out side noise or it may even be too quiet. I found that if I lay a heating pad on low/medium and wrapped in a towel for 15 min (while I gave her a bottle and I would remove it before I laid her down) would heat her bed enough to make the transition from my arms to her bed fuss free. I also use white noise to aid in her uninterrupted sleep; my house was too quiet because it is just her and I, even the slightest noise would wake her, it really helped. Although now that she is teething she has started waking up every 4-5 hours about 4 nights a week but that is to be expected. Good luck, I feel for you because I have been there too. I hope this info helps.

Jenny

I also had my son sleep with me when he was little. Although it was hard I had to put him in his crib and let him be in there even if he cried. What I would feed him and put him in his crib. If he woke up I gave him a pacifier and stood next to his bed patting his back and singing to him until he fell asleep. This was also the time when he got his puppy. This little stuffed dog that now at two my son still finds comfort in sleeping with. I never left him alone crying there, I always waited until he was dead asleep. It took about a week for him to get comfortable with it and then finally he would stay asleep when I put him to bed. Takes some work and some crying but in the long run its the best thing. Hope our suggestions help!

Melissa

My advice, You have all heard what your doctor said "Don't let your child sleep with you" But does anyone listen, NO! Maybe you should blame yourself for what you have created. I am sure you are a great mom, but come on it is just common sense. I have sifted through a ton of your guys post and you all try and blame everything wrong in your lives on everyone else. Take a look at what you do to create your problems! Own your own actions. We have all been dealt some shitty things in our life, but we all get through it. Some of the problems you guys talk about are ridiculas. I mean come on the trouble in Irac and the starving kids aroung the world, THAT IS A PROBLEM!!!! ABCDEFG

SURE !
I'm sorry you're having a bad day, dear abcdefg.
Actually, I miss screaming and shouting at someone too !

abcdefg,
Um..excuse me...we are a single parent forum, trying to help with issues exactly like bears. To us that is a problem worth solving. Many of us have no other methods of support and need this forum. You obviously have strong support elsewhere and find our problems silly and petty. If you really need serious help than please post your problem and we will help you the best we can. If not I think putting other people down and berating a single mother truly asking for help makes you a very negative voice that might be better off somewhere else!
And Bear, please ignore the rude comments! Your little one is just adjusting. What you're doing is great. You might have to let him cry it out a little in his crib while you pat him or sing. My son has a nap tape of classical music that comforts him everyday, it also blocks out any disruptive noise. And for all of you who are patting babies back while you comfort them...please remember to put your baby to sleep on their back, not their stomachs, it's a proven medical fact and I care too much about all of these children not to say anything..sorry. Good Luck and let us know how it goes! Jakesmommy

abcdefg,
I just wanted to say insults can fly both ways.
(did you come up with that displayed named or did your 5yr old help you)..
If this site is so petty and not worth your time why did you bother responding..
Next time you need to vent anger and choose to take it out on a caring single parent of this site. WHY DON'T YOU DO US ALL A FAVOR AND JUST TAKE IT OUT ON YOUR SELF....
(sorry to everyone if I seem rude.. but additudes like this just really get to me

How a person could be so rude is beyond me. Do not listen to a word that miserable person said. You just do whatever it is feels right to you. And to abcdefg, maybe you should take a further look into these posts and really read them. We all pour our heart and soul into this and for someone to come along and judge without ever even taking part in anything is awful. Maybe you should look into your own life and fix whatever it is that is obviously making you unhappy before you judge others. Jayme

ABCDEFG WROTE....my advice, You have all heard what your doctor said "Don't let your child sleep with you" But does anyone listen, NO! Maybe you should blame yourself for what you have created. I am sure you are a great mom, but come on it is just common sense. I have sifted through a ton of your guys post and you all try and blame everything wrong in your lives on everyone else. Take a look at what you do to create your problems! Own your own actions. We have all been dealt some shitty things in our life, but we all get through it. Some of the problems you guys talk about are ridiculas. I mean come on the trouble in Irac and the starving kids aroung the world, THAT IS A PROBLEM!!!! ABCDEFG
HEY ABCDEFG...CLEVER. hey just to let you know if you can reread my post i never mentioned "shitty things in my life" did I? MY CHILD IS THE WORLD TO ME THATS WHY I ASKED IN CONCERN! why do you bother to come here? this is an open discussion on how to get advice on sleep not a tear a** on what we do wrong in your eyes. i do help out with the war my family is there too! how does that sit on your mind? you said.. and i quote. "I have sifted through a ton of your guys post and you all try and blame everything wrong in your lives on everyone else." who did i blame this on? i dont think i said it was anyone besides my own action! and my doctor said its FINE and PERSONAL CHOICE (BUT IM SURE YOUR DOCTOR KNOW THE BEST OVER ALL DOCTORS) to have my child sleep with me! i ask you in the kindest way to not write in my posts bcs to me you are only negative and angry!!! ONLY if you have nicer advice, not a comment of anger thats not what i asked for!TREAT PEOPLE HOW YOU WANT TO BE TREATED! AND ONE MORE THING YOU SAID... "Maybe you should blame yourself for what you have created. I am sure you are a great mom, but come on it is just common sense." NO ITS COMMON SENCE TO NOT LEAVE NOTES LIKE THIS TO ME BCS I DID NOTHING BUT ASK A SIMPLE QUESTION, I AM NOT BLAMING ANYONE, AND I DO TAKE PART IN OUR COUNTRY. DONT SHARE ADVICE ONTO ME IF YOU DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME THE COMMENT ON IRAQ AND ALL THAT WAS A LOW BLOW!!!!! thanks ABCDEFG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WELL SAID!!!! Jayme

Okay I am sad to see this one inconsiderate person create so much anger in our once secure and happy forum. The alphabet member apparently has some issues and has decided that we are innocent and unsuspecting victims towards which their anger must be directed. It was a low blow and it was unecessary. I say we just ignore it and move on. we have enough issues in our lives without having to worry about cruel comments on this forum.
So here is my suggestion..if abcdefg wants to post, make your own..tell your story, you obviously joined for a reason. If you are so full of hate and need help than just ask, but if not it is obvious that you only upset our forum and you're not welcomed here!
Bear, take a deep breath, you are an innocent victim and don't deserve to have to defend yourself! you did nothing wrong and I feel so bad this had to happen to you! I hope nothing like this ever happens again, we have enough troubles in our lives