I might have created a monster!

Being a single mom from he very beginning I have always let my daughter sleep with me. Since no one has ever offered to watch her and I no family or close dependable, responsible friends around, she has never been away from me....needless to say she won't take a bottle.

She is now nine months and only nurses three times during the day, but all the time during the night.

Eventually I need to go back to work (I am a bartender) and suddenly I have no idea how the person watching her will be able to put her to sleep or comfort her through the evening...

Already I tried taking her to a sitter and she cried for a half hour straight, before I got a call to come back....We are very close but I need to be able to leave her with other people and know that she is happy and comfortable...

Where do I begin?????

Hi,

I'm a single parent of a 18 month old and only had 6 weeks leave. On the 5th week I started taking him to the baby sitter for 1/2 day and put him in his bed on the 5th week. He slept in a bassinet in my room during my leave.

You have your work cut out for you....get the asprin ready...hahaha

1. Start pumping your milk then using a bottle. Playtex nipples are good but you may have to buy different ones until you find one she likes.
2. Get her out of your bed and into her own. This sounds crazy but put a night gown that you have worn a cupple of times and lay it in her bed...it holds your sent. get her some instrumental music to listen to while on her way to sleep.

3. Make sure there is nothing in her bed that she can hurt herself or smother herself with. Be strong. She is going to cry. Depending on your home, sit on the front for 10-15 minutes while she cryes, go back and asure her you are there but DONT pick her up. Go back outside for 15-20 minutes check on her then back outside (take the baby monitor with you). She may cry for an hour but each time she will quiet down sooner.

The hard part is the crying but as long as she is not in any danger and you check on her she will be fine. Hope this helps and Good luck.

quote:

Originally posted by phoenixrose:
[qb]I might have created a monster!

Being a single mom from he very beginning I have always let my daughter sleep with me. Since no one has ever offered to watch her and I no family or close dependable, responsible friends around, she has never been away from me....needless to say she won't take a bottle.

She is now nine months and only nurses three times during the day, but all the time during the night.

Eventually I need to go back to work (I am a bartender) and suddenly I have no idea how the person watching her will be able to put her to sleep or comfort her through the evening...

Already I tried taking her to a sitter and she cried for a half hour straight, before I got a call to come back....We are very close but I need to be able to leave her with other people and know that she is happy and comfortable...

Where do I begin?????[/qb]

That�s a good plan.

Start immediately, even if you have another month�s (or more) time.
If you have a lot of time, you can do it in steps (which is not necessarily easier-think about the best solution for you).
It does not get easier when they�re older, on the contrary (that is my experience).
Remember that if you give up in the middle, you�ll have to start over, and that�s worse for both of you.
Don�t worry about it too much.
Yes, she will cry, bad, but it will only be a few nights. And there is no other way.
We�ve all gone through it and came out of it fine (baby and mommy).
When she wakes up in the night, give her a drink of water, no milk. That will help weaning her at night, and it gives her some relief (she might be thirsty too !).
Start giving it to her from a normal glass. In a few months she will be able to drink from a glass on a regular basis, at all meals, and after she�s a year old you can also give her normal milk (if there is no contrary medical indication). Then you can also wean her during the day (from the pumped milk).

The problem with being a single mother and breastfeeding is that once you take the baby in your arm (when she cries at night), it�s near impossible not to feed them, and it�s terrible for the baby, because she smells Mommy and the milk, and she�s in the exact situation/position where she usually would be fed. So, make sure you don�t pick her up, is the only solution. You must find other ways to comfort her.

I also made the experience that my son would sleep no problem at the sitter (in the afternoons), while it was a complicated ritual at home (e.g. I had to lie in bed with him until he slept).

Did you have another go at leaving her at the sitter ?

phoenixrose,
These are great ideas from RED and JAP. I practiced these steps myself and it really did not take long at all.
Good Luck.
Carla