Hi everyone. Tonight I'm eating oreo cookies with milk! yummy!! I couldn't sleep so I thought I would ask for some advice. I'm 25 and living with mom and dad. I'm also 25 weeks pregnant. I have no job and very little money left. The father isn't around to help with any doctor's bills or anything.....I'm glad he's not around though! I have a huge car payment and other debt. I have been applying for jobs for the past month and have had no luck. My parents think that I should file for bankruptcy while I still can. If I were to get a job, I could only work up until the first week of December or so. I just don't know what to do. I never thought I would ever be in the situation to even consider filing for bankruptcy. I'm almost out of money and have the bills to pay. When I met the baby's father, he really took me for a ride and screwed everything up for me. My parents think I would be better off doing it so I could start out fresh for me and my son. I just don't know what to think. Any advice?

I would so hold off on the bankrupcy. It will haunt you for years to come. Can you sell the car and get one with less or even no payments. If your living with your parents your expenses should be manageable. Does your state offer health coverage for low income. I know here in Mass I was able to get on state insurance which covered the medical bills until I got a good job. As far as other debt if it's credit card debt there are many debt consolidation programs out there that will make it very easy to get the debt paid without it negatively affecting your credit. Now a days if you have bad credit it really puts you at a disadvantage and a bankrupcy will kill it. If there is no other way fine but I'd bet with a little research you could find a better way. Check with your states services and they could probably help direct you to good resources in your area. Just be prepared to spend a lot of time making phone calls.

I use to think that credit didn't matter much for me because I was young and you really only needed good credit to buy a home and heaven knew being a non-educated single mom in my twenties it was going to be a long time before I was ever in that situation. I had large cc debt, minimum wage job, and a big car payment, and huge housing costs. I thank my lucky stars I didn't do a banckrupcy because if I had I never would have, just four years later, been able to buy the home I'm in now. All I'm trying to say is you never know what the future holds and never take things for granted. Your situation can change for the better in a heartbeat.

Thanx for the advice scoutmom! I hope my situation changes for the better very soon!

Hey tiff,
do they have medicaid in your state or anything like that to help you with your medical bills. Being single and unemployed you should qualify I did. i don't have to pay for a thing towards doctor bills. Even the delivery will be taken care of. i have two jobs but I'm still 22,000 in debt. i have almost filed bankruptcy 3 times. My only problem is it wouldn't get rid of my school loans and those are about half of my debt. The rest being old medical bills and credit cards. i'm going to tell you from my experience I wish I had filed bankruptcy 3 years ago when i first ended up with 35,000 dollars in doctor bills. See while i was sick I couldn't work so I just kept transferring my debt, first to credit cards, then I couldn't pay those anymore. I couldn't afford school because I owed so much money to other places so my student loans that were supposed to be deferred till after graduation became due because i wasn't in school. It was a mess. I was able to get siome medical bills written off and worked two jobs last year to bring my debt down. Then I got sick again and fell back some more. My credit is shot reguardless. i was actually told i would have better luck getting a new car and getting loans if I filed bankruptcy because then I'd have no more open debt and could not file again for 7 years. Granted it is on your report for that long but it is a fresh start. I wish i had done it in the beginning. Now i have horrific credit and can only buy things with cash. It will be that way till I can manage to pay back that 22,000. Being a single mom, going to school full time, and working to pay basic bills I don't see that happening real soon. I would definately weigh your pro's and con's. If you have another option go for it. But don't make the same mistake I did and keep transfering thats not gonna help.

You definately cannot control debt by causing more. Laura it sounds like you really had no other options and poor health can really hammer you. Sometimes Bankruptcy is the best way to go I'm not denying that I just think too many people do it first without checking all of their options and then regret it. By then it's too late and the damage is done. It takes a lot of research though. Often the help is out there it's just extremely difficult to find not to mention frustrating.

Well, I might have an interview this week!!! Keep my fingers crossed. I know somehow things will work themselves out! Thanx ladies!

Scoutsmom has some very good points here.
If you are in debt and don't have a job there are other options you can do other than bankruptcey.

First myth about bankruptcy- Your slate is wiped clean. This is not true. Your slate in not wiped clean and it will follow you around for a min. of 7 years.
Second myth- You are better off claiming bankruptcy because creditors will give you more credit because you can not file again within 7 years. Again not true at all. You can file brankruptcy again within the 7 years depending on what chapter you file. Or you can change from one chapter to another plus add on to it.
Okay "jill" files chapter 7 then 5 years down the decides she can't handle that either so she changes her 7 to a chapter 13. Well now she not only gets to whatever she had on the 7 but can add anything that she acquired in the past 5 years. There are several different chapters one can file depending.
Plus why the HECK would you want more credit when credit is what got you in trouble in the first darn place!!!????
Third myth- Bankruptcy does not hurt anyone, but possibly the person filing. Again not true.
Bankrupcy hurts every single person in this country including the lawyers that will help you file it.
This is part, only part, of the reason companies have to charge so much for merchandise. WE ALL pay for it in one way or another. If you owe a company money and claim bankruptcy they have to regain there loss somewhere and it is through the people who do pay for their things. The same as theft from a store. Who pays for the merchandise stolen from a store? We all do, every single person who shops in that store.

Tiffnbaby,
I feel for your situation I do. You must feel like you are stuck between a rock and a hard place. Finding a job pregnant can be very difficult and finding one that is worth something might even be more difficult.
Now I don't know where you live but if you live in town you could always get a job at a gas station or conveniant store that you can possibly walk to. This would give you some type of income and not much expense in gas.
I also agree with ScoutsMom to sell the car. A great way to get out of debt is to sell your stuff. Stuff does not make us happy we only think it does for a short time. The new smell wears off very quickly. Sell what ever you can. Have a garage sale if you have to and get out from under.
The borrower is SLAVE to the lender. I volunteer financial advising through my church and I have had several people come to me thinking they were bankrupt. You know how many of those actually claimed bankruptcy in the end? Zero. Not one of them ended in bankruptcy, and many of them single parents. They were able to get out of debt and so can you.

Laura mentioned that she has to pay everything in cash, well that is not a bad thing. It is actually very smart. If you pay in cash you won't have debt and you won't be a slave. If you pay in cash you have to wait until you have the money to spend it therefore not being in a situation like you are in now. This all goes round and round.
Life is a like a snowball, it starts off little in the beginning and grows as it rolls down hill. Now what you put into it at the beginning is what will grow in the end. If you start that ball with BS all you will end up with is a big ball of crap. If you start that ball off with nothing but good stuff, you will have a bunch of blessings and good stuff in the end.
Look at some of my other posts concerning debt.
Tiff, you can get out from under without hurting yourself or others. You can do it you just might have to get creative and sacrifice a little now to receive lots later.
I pray all will work out for you and your little one.
God bless.

I don't have alot of advice about what you can do currently, except echo scoutsmom. Also, apply for medicaid, sell your car, apply for food stamps, and start the proceedings for child support. I don't care how involved you baby's father is, he owes the child money for the next 18 - 19 years. Hang in their. You'll be fine. Also, look for work in retail. They are hiring seasonal help. Just don't tell them you are quiting during their busy time.

Thanx again for all the replies. Today I went to the department of child and family services and applied for healthy start. I'm going to put my car in the yard tomorrow and put a for sale sign on it. Though it will be hard to part with that damn car...I love it! My dad told me today that he might be able to get me a job starting at 10$ an hour. Hopefully things will start looking up. alim4547, the father has nothing to do with me or his unborn child and has no intentions on ever being there. But I will be filing for child support once the baby is born. If he doesn't want to take any responsibility for the child he helped me create, then his wallet can! I don't exspect a thing from him, child support included. He doesn't even pay it for his other 4 year old son that he doesn't ever see. But at least the amount he will owe me will accumulate and someday he will get what he deserves. Everyday I think about how I can better myself for me and my son. I realized awhile ago that after he is born, it's like starting my new life. I hope to make the right changes and find the right place for me and baby Keegan! Thanks everyone for helping me with this!

Tiffnbaby,
Please let us know how the job hunt goes. I sure hope it works out for you.
I am glad you applied for aide. Keep looking and see what else they have available. You never know.
You are going down the right road and you will do well. Keep thinking and doing the right thing and all will come to you in time.
Good luck and God bless.

tomany2count,

Well, I have applied for tons of jobs and I'm having no luck! I'm getting a little scared that no one will hire me soon. I am due in mid December so I don't have much time to work anyway. I just gotta get these bills paid. I was offered a job through a temp service but I had to decline on that position. It's at the same place where my ex works and we no longer speak. He doesn't want anything to do with me or the baby. If I worked where he did I would probably do something that wouldn't be good. I seem to be filled with so much hatred toward him these days. You know I think of him all the time and it just gets harder because of all the hurt and pain he put me through. He just walks away like our unborn son doesn't even matter. I do daydream about the day if he ever tries to come around and see his baby. He already told me he doesn't want to be in his life. As far as I'm concerned, he just gave up his parental rights. Hopefully someone out there will hire me. I guess I'll hope for a miracle. I'm planning for my baby shower and finally got the nursery all done! So at least I have been able to keep myself busy. But it's gettin a little boring right about now. Take care and thanx for the reply. Tiffnbaby Keegan

Tiffnbaby,

I don't know about Ohio, but in Nevada, they will enter an order of child support. If he doesn't pay, they will try to garnish his wages. If he doesn't work and won't pay, then the state will pay a portion of the child support. Usually $200 - $400. They will in return suspend his license, then issue a warrant, and then jail. None of that is your problem, because the state handles it for you. You can start child support hearings now. The judge will order a paternity test when the baby is born. When he proves that he is the father, the child support order will already be in affect. Also, apply for WIC. It will pay for formula if you don't breast feed.

Hey Tiff,
Sorry the job hunt is not going to well. Have you tried a corner gas station or a little restaurant or something? I know it is not your dream job or anything but it might help till the baby comes. How about cleaning houses for people like the elderly or a out of home working Mom. Maybe baby sitting. I have worked more than one paper route for extra cash. Who knows from this experiance you might become self employed and never have to "look" for a job again. Wouldn't that be cool?
I would also apply for wic. You should be able to get aide in your area since you don't have an income at this time. Wic will help you know with food so baby is healthy.
Good luck it will fall into place. It is always darkest before the dawn.
God bless.

tomany2count,
Well, I'm beginning to go out of my mind!!! I did apply at a little restaurant down on the corner. Haven't heard a thing from them either. I'm beginning to think that I am doomed and will have to file for bankruptcy. I even applied at the local employment agency but they have nothing either. All I want to do is work and get these bills paid. At this point the bills aren't going to get paid and I don't know what to do. My parents will probably help but you can be assured they aren't going to be happy. I did apply for WIC and healthy start so I hope that all works out. I sometimes don't even feel like getting out of bed anymore cause nothing seems to go my way. I am trying to stay positive but it's looking kinda grim. Oh how I need to win the lottery!!! I like that saying...it is always darkest before the dawn.....I'm ready for the dawn to arrive! Tiffnbaby

tiffnbaby,
Does your state have some insurance program for people with low to no income? When I had my son, I was very broke and CA has a program called Medi-cal. They paid for all my pregnancy and birthing related expenses. I also recieved WIC, its a good program as well. Keep your chin up, a good job will come around sooner or later. I would recommend not filing for bankruptcy, it definately can come back to haunt you. I manage aparments and constantly have to deny people because they have bankruptcies on their credit reports, even if they go back years. Good luck and keep us posted!