hello ladies. i'm a single, never married man who's really in love with a single mom. she's not yet divorced, but only bcause her soon to be ex is still in the navy and won't be back till sept. she would have divorced him a year ago but his schedule kept them from finalizing anything. they are still friends but can't be husband/wife anylonger. she's 22 and back at home with her parents along with her wonderful little 3 yr old girl. she's taking college classes, and working when she can. she has lots of support from her family and his taking care of the little one. i'm a friend of her and her family, see them socially at church and for sunday dinners at their home. we all get along wonderfully. i've known her for a long time and have fallen hard for her and her daughter. i adore them both but don't want to rush anything. i certainly won't do anything until her divorce is final. NOW my question: do you think, after being separated for almost a year and a half that she might be ready for something else. again- i'm not into rushing, i'm mostly looking for what state of mind she might be in. i've read some of the posts from other 20 something single moms living at home so i want to be very careful on how i approach her.i want to give her all the space she needs, but i want her to know i'm there for her if she's interested. any insight into her mindset and emotions would be greatly appreciated.

It totally depends on the past relationship and what caused the end of it. I'm a 23 yr old single mom, and I was ready for another relationship really quickly, but that's because my relationship with my ex wasn't deep and the end was extremely quick!

One thing you can ask her, is if she'd ever want to have an adult evening out (just hanging out, concert, movie, whatever), away from her child. If she's ready for that, chances are she's ready for more. Most single moms, when they aren't ready to move on yet, will cling to their children and not be ready to do anything without them, at least in my experience.

You can also get some hints from what she talks about. If she still talks a lot about her ex, and what things used to be like, then she's probably not ready for more yet.

Chances are, she knows you're interested. She'll let you know when she wants more. We women almost always do.

XeraRose, thanks for your time and input. that helps alot. i do think she knows i'm interested and would love to have the chance to have more of a relationship. if something happens i'll be sure to let you know. thanks again

Yes, I agree...I think spending time alone with her to see where it goes with be a great start.

Having walked a mile in something close to her shoes, let me give you my advise.

My husband left me two years ago, and we then worked out our divorce. I've been single for two years, but just divorced now for 1 week.

I felt like I was already free of him. During that long seperation from him, I thought I had already moved on. In many ways I had. I thought as soon as the divorce was finalized I could move straight into the dating world. But I'm starting to think I might want to take a year off to have to myself. It's dawning on me that I'm free, and I really like it.

Let her get the divorce finalized. Give her some space to be herself, and do what she wants to do with no partner. If you set something free and it comes back, then it really is your's.

Until the divorce is final your heart doesn't truly belong to you. I didn't believe it until I went thru it.

Hello!

Being a single mum too i think the best thing to do is see how things go i.e it's ok for you to make known your feelings (and or intentions) but at the same time give a little space for her to ponder on it and make a clear headed decision. She may have a little resentment (depending) on the circumstance that she may not even be aware of & then it starts to manifest in a later relationship? That's been my experience anyways. Hope that helps

it totally depends on why they are separated. My husband and I have been separated now for 7 months and I too live at home with my mom. I feel like I am ready to start dating but only because my marriage was dead for a long time and I didn't love him. I would find out why they are not separated and then try to approach her. good luck

Good for you Bartmann!

I think it would be wonderful to build a friendship with this woman. You're attracted to her, obviously, and you have the chance to find out what really makes her tick.

If I was her (tho I'm obviously not), I would welcome the chance to spend 'adult time.' As well, having a partner in crime to take my child to the disney flicks with etc would be fantastic. I would want to keep it platonic, as tough as that may be, cuz I'd still be finding my new place in the world and confused about my separation. At the very least, I'd have a new friend!!