Help! My daughter's father earned the majority of his money illegally and has most of his assets in other people's names. he has a TON of money, drives expensive cars and owns a great deal of property. Is it possible for the Friend of the Court to tap into hidden sources of income? Or should I hire a private detective to do the job? Also, does child support guarantee visitation rights? Can I request supervised vistiation? I don't want him to be able to take her. I'm concerned about what she'll be exposed to. i need the financial support, but I'm willing to forego it if it means unsupervised visits. Can anyone offer suggestions?

I live in Florida and went after my sons father for child support. They finally served him with a court order this past May and like your daughter's father he has a lot of hidden assets. Sadly, they can not allow money that is in other people's names, unless directly affiliated with him. As for visitation, it is my understanding that if you were not ever married then you are the custodial parent. The courts told me that my son's father would have to file seperatly and take me to court if he wanted visitation. So, far he hasn't. But if the father kidnaps the child then he can turn around and sue you for support. So, you really should turn in paperwork for legal custody through the courts. If he is late on his payments then the judge will be in your favor. My son's father is such a jerk that he is staying two months behind and making payments the last "exactly the last day of each month" not a day early. According to him, they can't do anything if he is only two months past due. Yet, child support see's it differently and suspended his license, is now taking him to court again for failure to meet his requirments and they will eventually arrest him for being in contempt of court. If you want child support to do more enforcements, you have to bother them. They say the squeaky wheel get's the attention. I wish you the best of luck. Julie

I'm not an attorney so this is not legal advice, but I strongly recommend against filing for support based on the circumstances you describe.

My biggest concern is your hesitation in allowing your child's father unsupervised visitation. The laws vary from state to state, but I don't think you have any control over it. In my state the court decides, and I've heard of cases where they force kids to visit parents who are in prison. It takes a lot for them to grant supervised visitation or take it away altogether. There has to be a proven record of abuse - which obviously you wouldn't want. But ultimately the court will not base a visitation ruling on a request from one of the parents.

That aside, there are many headaches and hassles in this whole process, and a lot of curveballs can get thrown your way.

For example, it doesn't sound like your child's father is willing to pay support, so your attorney or the court would have to serve him with a summons to even get him in front of a judge. It's possible to evade process servers for months and months. If he travels a lot or moves, it will be difficult for you or anyone to track him down. In the meantime you will be wasting your money on legal fees. Every letter your attorney sends, every phone call or voice message, every milisecond they spend on your case is billed to you.

If you do happen to get to court, you don't know what kind of judge you'll end up with. He or she might keep allowing continuances of your case, which can drag on for a long time. Or, your ex-boyfriend's attorney might have tricks up his/her sleeve and create further delays, all in the name of psyching you out. I mean, you have to be willing to fight and stand strong over the long haul, which is not always the right answer. Sometimes that brings more trouble into your life.

Add to that the potential of his growing frustration or anger at you for filing for support in the first place, and you have the makings of a nasty situation.

Anyway, I don't mean to sound so pessimistic, but the reality is that this is not a simple, cut and dried process.

If you're afraid of this guy's bad influence on your child's life, it seems like filing for child support would be like poking a stick at a wasp's nest. And, think about the future - do you really want to be entangled with this guy for the next 18 years? Let's say you do get through the entire process and he has to start paying - he could easily have you in and out of court trying to lower the amount or mess with visitation any time until your child is an adult. Or, he could move, change his name, leave the country, stop paying altogether. It doesn't end with the court order, it only begins there.

I would really think about it. If you think you can support your child on your own I would find a way to do that.

I wish you best of luck - this isn't an easy road.

Sorry for the long post.