hey all. i would like a little advise on one of my kids.
currently i have been paying child support for my oldest daughter(11yrs old) for over 5 years since the ex and i seperated. i have never had a problem paying child support and im happy to do it. my problem is, i rarely get to see my daughter. i have a court order that states when i get her and how much time i get her. when that times comes, her mom or her grandma 75% of the time say something came up and i cant get her. i get everything from friends birthdays to great families birthdays and everything inbetween. now i know her family is important, but i also feel my time with her is important as well. from what i understand and what my daughter tells me, she spends 95% of her time with her grandma and her mom gets her when she feels like it. so basically she lives with grandma. it has gotten to the point where im fed up with all this. im paying child support to her mom and my daughter is not even there 95% of the time. maybe thats not my say so and maybe it is(sorry venting about that part). i was thinking of filiing a motion to get more time with my daughter. i feel that would be a great choice, but would it? how would that affect the current child support? im kinda clueless when it comes to the court stuff. all i want is to see my daughter on my time, and if possible more. i and the rest of my family miss our time together. its also gotten to the point where i have no influence on my daughter, including parenting choices. her ways have changed, and not in a good way. this is all due to me rarely seeing her. anyway... any advise will be greatfull and thx in advance.

Gook luck with the system.

I would go for full custody.

Have you written down the dates when you didn't get your time with your daughter? Can you try to document how much time she spends with her grandma and when?

You can try to get her in contempt for not allowing parenting time, but you will need show that it was not in your daughters best interest to not be with you.

Hope this helps.

Well, since you asked . . . most courts from what I've seen would not be happy with someone who is denying a parent their ordered parenting time. I think it may be in your best interest, and that of your daughter's if you do file a motion. Maybe see if you can get custody, if that's what you want. Especially if your child is living with her grandmother most of the time. I would think that obviously there is something more going on that you probably dont know about, but that's just speculation.

Does your daughter want to live with you? Does she complain about not seeing you enough? In some courts the judge will take the child aside and talk to the child about events, where she sleeps, lives and what her choice would be of what she wants.

If you want to talk more, you can contact me on myspace or IM me. I have worked with lots of courts and child custody/family law.

Good luck with your situation.

thx for the advice. i need to do something, this has been ongoing for a long time now. smshybug, id like to talk to you more about this. i feel you have a great deal of advise. i tried to pm you but id need to get a paid membership for that. if im allowed to post my email let me know.

laybac, my myspace is www.myspace.com/smshybug. that's the best way to contact me.

quote:

Originally posted by smshybug:
laybac, my myspace is www.myspace.com/smshybug. that's the best way to contact me.

contacted.

Well I don't know to much about the system, but hang in there...it will work out in the end.

I think it's great that you have paid child support all these years and do it willingly for your daughter. just always keep in mind because you pay your child she has a better life style. She will thank you someday! If your daughter is living at her Grandmother's house more than at her mother's house this needs to stop! Grandparents are wonderful in the lives of our children doing the job of grandparenting but when there are both parents around to do the job of parenting then that's who should. When your ex says your daughter has a friends B-day party to go to say that you will take her and pick her up. I know from having teenage kids of my own and your little girl will be one soon, you want to know her friends and her friends parents. I also think it's great you want time with your daughter so fight for it you must care a lot about her or you wouldn't be here writing about how you feel. Good luck to you and keep doing the right things and it will all work out.