I need to vent, I need to tell my story, and I need to let it all out before I EXPLODE! The �father� of my child files for visitation, which was fine but I really wished we had discussed it and worked something out before he filed with the court. Along with filing for visitation he requested that the court lower his child support to compensate for his traveling expenses (he lives in NJ, we live in Vegas) and that the child support be paid based on NV law. You haven�t even called or bother to see my child in 5 years and I�m supposed to believe that you�ll see him now on a regular basis? Anyways, I freaked and hired an attorney. Child support order is in NJ and we took his filing to be a petition to transfer jurisdiction to Vegas. Well it turned out that travel is only compensated for if the child and custodial parent move, not the other way around. Also, by NV�s standards child support would be more here then in NJ. So of course he changes his mind and petitions that the jurisdiction of the case not be transferred. After all this BS we lose the case. Now it�s not just that we lost that makes me mad, it�s that he�s telling all his little friends and family that I started the whole thing, that I requested that child support be raised because I was mad that he filed for visitation. God if you are going to be a game player at least admit to it. I understand that people want to shell out the least amount of money as possible but at least own up to it.

Annah-Lizah, you said you lost the case. What are the ramifications? Is he planning on visiting his child? Was your support affected?

:welcome: Go ahead and vent away. It does get frustrating when dealing with people who aren't very reasonable and have to play games and lie to everyone to make themselves look good. This is a safe place to let it all out so you can feel better.

Well NJ will keep jurisdiction and child support will be a little less than if it were in NV. It was just such a waste of time and a waste of attorney fees. He plans on flying my child out after Christmas and I'm so scared. It's across country, I haven't been away from my child for more than a few weeks, and now I barely know this guy. We were together for 2 years and he was absent for 5. I think he's doing this because of pressure from his family. I mean come on you can't call or write on a regular basis but it's suddenly so important that you see my son for the holidays?

Anyone have any ideas on how I can track down someone for child support, DOR is doing all they can but until I have an address they cant serve court papers, they are using their resources, but maybe their is something i havent tried or some way to search online???

There are dozens of search engines online to find people. Of course you have to pay, but I don't think they are too much. And, if you get child support out of it, it will be worth the fees.

Try peoplefinders.com. Their one time report is $9.95, you have to have the person's birthdate and city/state.

I tried it with my mom's name and birthdate, no city/state, it brought up her old information from Florida and her current location in Tennessee. You could try that.....

do you think DOR uses these sites, I hate to pay for access to things they are already doing. they have his SS#, but they need to serve him to go to court for support order first without that they can't put a hold on anyting, and this would be a great time because its income tax time!I know a friend of his but of course he wont talk Everything I had info about has changed, Also DOR said I have to ask a judge for retro pay-i spoke with my lawyer and he said whenever they find him its retro back to the day she is born? Anyone else know the answer.

I don't have any faith in DOR. If you are collecting public assistance they might help collect but I've jumped through hoops trying to get money from my ex. Since we're venting let me tell you my story.
My kids were 10, 12 and 16 when I divorced. I was working 3 part time jobs to try to make ends meat but was not making enough to pay the bills. The ex was ordered to pay child support but wouldn't. I found a job working every other weekend from friday to Sunday. I told him if he would just take the kids during those times I could make enough to pay the bills and wouldn't push the child support. He said "I hope you all die" and refused. Thank God for friends and family. He stalked me and threatened to kill me every day. I had to move out of state. The Dor has taken his license and attached any assetts (he is carful not to use banks and works under the table as a contractor). It has been 7 years. I have had regular contact with DOR. They keep saying they will "look into" filing contempt but never do. The tell me I can hire my own lawyer, like I can afford that! They would say things like "we can't find him". I would track him down and give them an address, who he is working for and a phone number but they have yet to do anything else. I got a letter yesterday saying that my son will be 18 next June and they will discontinue child support as of that time. So the jerk gets away with never supporting his kids. He never has done anything for these kids. No bday or X'mas cards or anything. There is some comfort though. It turns out that my children were much better off in that respect. I found out 2 years ago that he had molested our daughters before we were divorced so I am so thankful to God that he didn't have any further contact with them. I am considering going through the child support network to recoup the over $20,000 he owes. If anyone has gone that route, let me know. I figure 66 percent of something is better than 100 percent of nothing.

I agree anything is better than nothing. I took the advice and used people finders, it was 19.95 I got some info although not sure how good it is, and connected him to other relatives anad possible addresses also current girlfriends info, If needed I guess I will get my lawyer to follow up to move things along, I am trying to have faith in DOR not sure if they will come through, but I wont give up yet. I guess sometimes we are better off without the fathers in our lives. I would prefer he just mail a check than have to worry about visitation.Have you trid legal aid Olive? I cant afford the lawyer either, but he is willing to make a payment plan because i have used himbefore, so if it gets me $$ its worth it In MA even if the father is "under the table" they consider earning potential and if they have the ability to make $ they are expected to get a job or two. Since he is a contractor, did they ppull his licenses too?

I just filled out the 13 pages from Child Support Network. I'm going to go that route and see if they can get him to pay. I really don't need the money anymore considering my kids are now grown but I sure would like to make him pay so he doesn't get away with it, seeing my kids and I went without for so long (not to mention what he did to my daughters). I also got a good idea from someone on this website. I'm going to call the IRS and let them know he is working and not paying taxes on his wages. That should get him in some hot water. My daughters don't want to take him to court for what he did so I'll make him as uncomfortable as I can.

Olive - I just want you to think about hiring a Private Collection Agency to help you collect your child support. Of course this is your choice, I just want to give you something to think about. Here is something I think you should know before you can make a
conscience decision of hiring a private collection agency:
1st of all I think the are "Deadbeat Profiteers" Parents have reported time and time again about being ripped off by private collection agencies. Some parents have paid these agencies 30% to 50% of any child support that was collected when the private collectors didn't do any of the work to collect the money, such as when the CP had taken direct action, the NCP had paid voluntarily, or the gov't had enforced the order by attaching wages, income tax refunds or other assets.
Some parents have reported that the contracts they signed defined "support" to include both currant and back support, so the collector's fee will apply to ALL amounts that come in. It has also been noted that collectors are taking 30%-50% of the money collected by gov't agencies after the families sigh up with private collectors. This happens when the gov't attaches an income tax fund
or located other assets through the new automated enforcement
techniques.
Do you know that most collection agencies requires the CP to change
their address at the government agency to that of the private collection agency. The CP must also signs a contract that gives the
collection agency 30-50% of the support collected.
Do you know that they will have you sign over a power of attorney to them? Attorney's state that this is sometimes an unbreakable contract. Private collector schemes to get the CP to sign misleading contracts that are called "adhesion" contracts and are the most difficult to cancel, even when you were ripped off or misled. Can
you afford to hire a private attorney to get out of a contract you sign? Most of us can't. Or we would hire a private detective or a private attorney.
Something else to consider:
Private agencies have been known to collect CS pmts. but the pmts are never sent to the CP. Some of these agencies have closed down and
disappeared. Sometimes private agencies take money that they had NO part in collecting. Here's an example: Collection agencies got paid
by taking their 30-50% fee from an IRS refund that the State Gov't CS agency ttached/enforced. Some families have had to pay additional fees for court costs and attorney fees on top of the 30-50% fee taken from the child support collected.
Current support is defined as back child support in the contract so that 30-50% of every penny that is paid goes to the private collection agency not just a % of back support that is due.
Look at it this way - your DB is in arrears of $20,000.00 - if you were to agrees to pay the collection agency 30% that would mean you would pay $6,000.00 to them for just past due support. You would get $14,000.00 Unless you are an attorney or can afford to hire an attorney to look over the contract you could be biting off more than you can chew.
You may not be able to control what is happening. Who is going to keep track of what is actually owed? What is actually paid? I caution you - Sometimes we are desperate to collect our child support. We need the money desperately to feed and clothes are children. Don't fall prey to a private collection agency that uses
schemes to get you to sing misleading contracts and grant power of attorney that are unbreakable.
There has been change in the CSE agencies and yes there is so much room for improvement. But at least you know you will not be ripped off - Write letters to CSE and other agencies with in Child Support gov't, make phone calls to follow up on those letters, stay on hold for 20-30 minutes until you get the answers that you need. Document everything, save every piece of paper. Take the idea's that are given to you through this group and other groups and put them into
action before you decide to sign any contract with a collection agency.
I know this is a long process and sometimes you don't get a response and the aggravation that it causes in your lives. But nothing in life comes easy; there are no easy solutions. Don't give up - stand firm and study the CSE laws.
I just thought you might need to know the other side of the coin.
Did you know that in SD child support is collectable until your child reaches 38 years old? What I mean by that is currant support stops at 18 but the arrears are collectable until your child reaches 38. Thats along time.
You in SD right? You can go to this website and get a profile on CS laws in your state.
http://ocse.acf.hhs.gov/ext/irg/sps/report.cfm?State=SD...7A5-EC3A06AA674BC3E9
Does he own any property that you can place a lien against? You can go to the Recorder of Deeds in the county he live in and run a search to find out. CSE can issue a lien against this property administratively, meaning they don't need a court order to do this. How much are his arrears if you don't mind me asking? What about requesting that CSE does a Financial Institution Data Match (MSFIDM) Freeze and Seize? This means that they can run his SSN and find out whether he has a checking/savings account. The NCP parent must have a minimum arrearage of $1,000 and 3 months with no payment. The account balance must be in excess of $1,000. Sometimes CSE can determine there are extenuating circumstances, and seize a lower amount. These are just somethings to think about. Good luck to you!

below are some sites that may help you locate the missing parent. Another thing you can do, if you have his last known address you can send a empty envelop there. On the envelope write "Address Correction Requested" make sure that you write your name and address on the envelope so the Post Office knows where to send the letter back to.
Here are some websites to check out. There is reverse look up on some of these so if you only have a telephone number you can find his/her address.

Anywho
Find Addresses-Phone Numbers
http://www.anywho.com

Infospace
multiple directory for finding addresses, phone numbers, public records, reverse look-up, and more
http://www.infospace.com

Melissa Data (Don't let name Confuse you)
Phone Numbers Look-up, Zip Codes, Maps, to much here to meantion
http://www.melissadata.com/lookups/phonelocation.
People Search
People Searches & Phone Reverse
http://peoplesearch.net/peoplesearch/peoplesearch_reverse_phone_number.html

People Yahoo
US Phone and Address Search, Email Searches,
http://www.people.yahoo.com

Phone numbers addresses
Phone Number and Lookup their Name and Street Address
http://www.reversephonedirectory.com/

Phone Numbers, Addresses and More Find Persons, Reverse Phone, Reverse Address | Area & ZIP/Postal Codes
http://www.phonenumber.com/10005/person.xhtml

Public Record Finder
Find Public Records
http://www.publicrecordfinder.com/ dwanrock7

Reporter - Everything is here
Multiple Search Options
http://www.reporter.org/desktop

Reverse Address Directory
Lookup by Address, Reverse Address Lookup, Reverse Address Search
http://www.reverseaddress.com/index2.htm

Searchbug
Find PPT - People, Places & Things
http://www.searchbug.com

Skipease
Addresses, Phone Numbers of all residents on a given street for a particular town and state / province. in the U.S or Canada.
http://www.skipease.com/nearby.html

Super Pages
Find People or Business
http://www.superpages.com//

Switchboard
Find Phone Numbers
http://www.switchboard.com

The Ultimate Search
Search Resources all over the web like phone books, email addresses,
http://www.theultimates.com

The Ultimate Search
Search Resources all over the web like phone books, email addresses,
http://www.theultimates.com

Where did they move?
Find out where they have moved
http://www.semaphorecorp.com/wdtg/jump.html

White Pages
Find Addresses-Phone Numbers-EMail Addresses
http://www.whitepages.com/phone-lookup

Who Where
Serach by name or phone number
http://www.whowhere.lycos.com

Zaba Search
Find Someone You've been Looking for.
http://www.zabasearch.com/

Good luck hope this helps. Some of these sites do cost money. Some don't. Actually most don't.