I am going to see a lawyer today, again.
I have been divorced a lot of years now and the my youngest of 3 is 16 years old.

Its a long story and I did put another post up but I just wanted to know if this has happened to anyone. I took my ex to court to collect child support. He actually took all three children to the court, and they were all dressed up. The kids did not say where they were going. The children were not allowed in, and the judge
told him he had to pay. He did not show for court the second time, and was issued a bench warrant. As a result at the age of 54 he lost his job, and now he is living with his sister.
He repeatedly told my 16 year old he was going to jail, as if it was my fault. Now he is trying to get back at me to sue for custody of the 16 year old and collect child support from me. so now I have to spend money on a lawyer when I am already strapped.

Since all this happened my 16 year old is failing in school and my daughter won't talk to me. I know I have made some mistakes a long the day, but a the involvement of my children has lead to a lot of alienation, so anyone experience anything like this? I really don't have a problem with the 16 year old living with his father but he doesn't have a home , job or health insurance, and I think my son is doing poorly as a result of this dispute.

I've actually experienced this on the other end of the situation. My parents seperated when I was 11 and finalized the divorce at 16. It was, traumatic. My father, the ******* he is, blamed everything on my mother. The fact that he had no money - that he couldn't pay for anything and that he couldn't take us out to eat or watch us, was all because "all his money went to my mother". In all honesty, he was forced to pay and it came right out of his check because he never paid beforehand. So, it was a higher amount because of all the back-pay he needed to pay off too.

Now, my father has since apologized to me about the bs he's put me through. But, I must say - if it wasn't for my mother sitting me down and speaking to me like an adult, I would've been completely lost. You're little girl is 16 years old, she understands whats going on - as long as she knows exactly whats going on. If her father is already speaking bad upon your behalf, I think you need to sit her down and explain your side of the story. Just remember, don't talk sh*t about the father. That will only give her more of a reason to alienate you and the schoolwork. You need to speak with her frankly and honestly, but there is ABSOLUTELY NO NEED EVER to bad mouth the other parent. It's bad enough that her father is doing it. You need to be the stable one here for her, and let her come up with her own opinions without force-feeding them down her throat. She'll love you for it later.

My mother was perfect and was honest, and never bad-mouthed my father. It was such a good feeling to have someone that atleast SEEMED to be "ok" and "stable" about the entire situation.


BEST OF LUCK.