Hi Everyone!

I am kind of new on this chat line and also new at this new feeling....I desperately need your advice. Let me tell a little bit about Us

Our marriage was so normal until a month ago, We have been married for about 8 years and have a 4 year old girl. Now my problems started when He wanted to move to California where all his family lives wich I may add he only has a sister and a brother over there since he has no parents.
Now his sister married this guy who happens to have a very over protected mother and has no daughters but instead another boy (28 years old and engaged), since this lady did not have any daughters she asked my husband permission to call my daughter "Grandaughter" in what my husband agreed, I was so blind I did not see it then!, but now this lady is so into my family and somehow maybe because of my husband "needs" for a mother or maybe just plain money since this lady has so much; somehow she intervined between Us; since we meved to California our marriage turned into a simple friednship where this lady decides when to go out, how and at what time!!!, but I do not blame her but my husband instead...
Anywho, after fighting so much over this situation of him spending more time with this "new" family instead of his daughter and me and trying to force Us to stay most of the time with them spending those days "together", we eventually exploted and decided not to be together anymore.
Naturally since all my family stayed here in Miami, I decided to come back with my daughter, and warned him about my intentions to come back, at first he did not want me to but then he changed his mind and all of the sudden he came up with the idea of enrolling the Marines REserve Corps, so I took advantage of that and here We are my daughter and me since a month ago!, but now everything has change, He did not signed after all into the Marines even when he quit his 2 jobs. Now he has no job and no Marines and He is threating me so much by telling me that since I took my baby with me without his permission I have to let my baby go over there for thanksgiving and he is giving me "his word" to return my baby to me 3 days later and if I do not agree He will file for kidnaping against me.
Like I said I have a month here already and he has not divorce papers filed at court, even when he did show me some papers to agree before we file as far as custody and child support he has not answer me yet since I put on those papers what I will like to agree as far as those things without signing them.
My question is what legal things can He do against me?, Can He take my baby away from me legaly talking?, What rights Do I have>?...
Please help me I really need a lot of prayers and lots of advices...if anyone can give me an advice about a similar situation please let me know....

I am so desperate....and so lonely...

GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!

Thank You!!

Kathya :balloons:

This woman's name isn't Sue C is it?

Kathya, I hope I didn't scare you. I ask because I know one family in CA and I know they have taken in what they call a surrogate grandchild and well, she is (the lady) a bit of a "whack job" to say the least. I'm not friendly with them. The husband was an oldtime friend of my fathers (who has since passed away).... so if for some reason I hit the nail on the head, please don't be afraid to post your feelings... I am NOT in contact with this person!

:balloons: Not scare at all!!...

Kind of confused I admit... ...

anyways nice to met You!, and about your question my answer is no, my name is Kathya and I am so afraid of what my "husban" (still) can do as far as custody and press charges against me. I overheard that the court does not allow mistakes like mine in the case of course that bring my baby with me was a mistake!...Even when He decided to leave and have everything ready to enroll into the Marines and not sign the last paper at the last minute, I think that He still did it almost all the way and He was abandoning Us, I even signed a paper where the marines are telling me not to expect any money for child support for the next 3 months that he was going to be in training but He never signed and quit all his jobs and left Us without insurance, car insurance and Health insurance and now a whole month has passed and he has not done anything...does everything he has done wrong counts at the time of getting divorce?...

Thank You for giving me some of your time and listen to my problems....

Kathya :love:

I wish I had some advice for you! Hopefully somebody with some knowledge will hop in here!

Hi Kathya, and welcome to the forum.
I'm not exactly sure either what he could do legally just yet either, without there having been court orders about custody, visitation and even one parent leaving the state with the child. He did verbally agree, and no legal documents say you can't do what you did.

Your best bet is get into a lawyer right away, and ask these questions. Consider filing for separation, temporary custody with some set visitation schedule. If you can reconcile the marriage later than great, but in the mean time you will have the legal documents stating what visitation will be, otherwise if you do allow the child to go visit on the holiday, he'll have just as much right to keep her there as you would until a judge/court order states otherwise.

kathya,

Welcome to the forum and bigggg hugggsssss. Without a court order, he can not legally do anything. I agree with Don, however, I think you should file for child custody as soon as possible. The father has a right to see his child, and if you do not live close to each other - you will have to deal with the distance in some way that works best for your daughter. But he can not legally take her away from you...based on what you have written. My ex tried to scare me with that too .. but really, if you read what most of the guys in this forum go thru - the scales seem to be tipped on the mom's side of things. I'm not saying what is fair, but I don't think you have to worry about that - unless you believe he will kidnap your daughter. Hopefully, it's not that out of control.

Seek legal counsel, and I will certainly keep you in my prayers.

Thank You Don and Inn1, I am so afraid of what Can He do since he keeps saying that he is going to file for a divorce and force me to live in California.
I have no idea where to go or file neither for child custody or separation, and everytime I go to seek for legal aid here in Miami They tell me the same answer that I need to be a resident of Florida in order for a lawyer to represent me and that means that I need to have at least 6 months living in Florida to get my residency...
Please pray for Us, I really need a good friend and tons of advice....

thank You for your prayers!
Kathya