I just for the first time realized that I am getting divorced and I am terrified. I have 3 children ages 11,5, and 2. I dont work and have no job skills. I am currently attending the local community college though. my husband is military and only has a little over a year til retirement. I have been married to him for 7yrs. We have talked about separating before. but this time i know its true. i currently live in nc and have no friends. nc is his home state. all my family is in tx and they have their own drama.I love him and dont want my marriage to end despite the fact that i havent been happy in years. there has also been bouts of infidelity and emotional and physical abuse. which we did go to counseling and things were better for a while. I feel like absolute crap. but what really scares me is how am i going to make it financially. how do i get decent job skills and afford child care at the same time. right now i dont even know where im going to live. please any advice at all.

It's going to be hard, but you'll pull through! My fiance doesn't want me to work either, but I feel that I have to do it for myslef and my kids. I was always taught never to depend on a man for anything, and that was one of the best lessons ever taught to me. All I can say is that you need to need to prepare early for the worst that can happen, I hate to say it. Since you're still attending college and working on a degree that may sustitute for work expereince. If that doesn't work maybe you can seek some type of assistance if you're interested. Also, if he's in the military and you're looking to divorce shouldn't you qualify for some of his earnings. I'm not sure, but keep faith in God and he shall see you through!

you will pull through because you have your kids to help you through. believe it or not even you 2yr old will support you in many ways.

it's good that your going to college that will help you alot in getting some experience. i know here in VT there are programs for single parents (reachup, programs within unemployment dept.,etc.) that will help get us into good jobs and gain job skills.

i know it's scary and being alone is scary but you'll do fine. i was 19 and left alone pregenate six years ago with only a weak high school eduation and diploma. now six years later i have a A.D. (graduated this year) and i am a service manager and go a raise this week. i've pretty much lived on my own for six years and i relly enjoy what i have gained from this experience in life. trust me there will be bad days it's not wine and roses but keep in mind everything happens for a reason.

by the way the abuse alone should be enough to want this to end. eaiser said than done though. i just go out of a 10month relation shop about 3 months ago. there was abuse to me and my son(mental and pshical) i wanted to end the relationship but did not want to be alone and single again. i was also afraid to walk out as well. he moved in with me and took over my apartment, things and in genereal my whole life and had the nerve to take credit for all the the stuff i had to work very hard for! i have gone through therapy and i am also on meds as well to help with depression and there are days where i still miss him but it's not as hard now as it was three months ago when it all ended.

so to make a long story short you can and will do fine. please email me and we can chat i've been through similar stuff as well. i can relate to some things. email address is VTangel27*aol.com

good luck to you
smvt

I feel for you and your life sounds like mine more or less adding a few years. I just posted a post about my story today. I have no advice for you but I tell you as I m sitting here crying that this cannot be happening to me, feeling better knowing there are others like me out there. I feel less alone. I hope all goes well for you and that we get through this faster than we think.
Sending you hugs!from Texas