This might seem like a long story, I will try and tell it as best as possible.

My wife and I were together for a total of 3.5 years, we were married for 11 months, when she needed some "space". The first few months went normal, I visited my then 20 month old son and my two step daughters every other weekend and once a week, I paid support for my son. A few months into it my wife starts sending me my son more and more and her two daughters to their dad more and more (she wanted freedom). Over the last few months of that year (2005) my son was removed from her by our local p.d because they didnt think she was in the right frame of mind to be with him and she has been arrested for d.v. against me (I didnt push it, she plead to disorderly conduct). After these events she seen even less of the kids. Thru the year of 2006 our son spent a total of 76 over nights with her, all of them being her choice, not me restricting. Her live in boyfriend has been convicted of a felony (agg.burglary) and he drinks in the house, they both smoke in the house, against the words of our sons doctor (he has asthma, allergies and chronic ear infections). The bf has had a few out bursts in front of the kids, twice my step daughter has called her father (she was 6)to come and get them because they were scared. In the begenning we agreed to do a dissolution, then things kinda went down hill, with her not seeing the kids as much and not helping me with anything, she has went from a full time custodial parent with her first husband to an every other week agreement. Our first court date is feb. 1st 2007, what can i expect, I have a very good lawyer and my wife says she cant afford one (she will probably end up with free legal aid, she is on welfare and not telling the state her bf lives there). I have requested a G.A.L. for my son. Since my wife got served she is adoment about having our son every other week (though she has never had him the whole week, 6 nights at most) I have documented this all very well and have day care sign in logs to show that I brought him, print outs from the DR. to show I took him and letters of approval from day care directors and teachers. I jumped thru hoops at my last job (government employee 6 years) to take care of him, I have their documentation to show time taken to go to the DR. I had to take a new job due to scheduling problems. I would like to be the residential parent, My wife had our son an average of 6.33 nights a month last year, I have offered her 4 nights a week and waive her child support if we could do a dissolution but she says no! I think I hold a safe and loving enviorment and he should go to her every other weekend and on wednesdays.

My questions are...What is to be expected on the first court date and what are the odds of her kicking my a%^ in court, my attorney is very assuring but I would like to hear from someone that has been their.

This might be confusing to read...sorry, but Thank you all in advance!!

Oh yeah, both of us live in ohio(same town) and neither live in the married residence.

I dont think u have much to worry about. Judges like to do what is in the best interest of the children. I dont think, based on what u posted, that your wife is gonna kick any butt. Your documentation will be very favorable to your case. She doesnt sound very stable and I think things will go your way. Good for u...being the concerned, stable parent.

Hang in there.

Thank you sir and bless you for your words, Just a little nervous.

Correction, I offered her 4 nights every other week not every week.

With everything you've posted, it sounds like your wife has dug herself into a hole and won't have anything to fight with when it comes to your children. When you're awarded full custody, the judge will then set up child support based on her income.

Don't turn it down, honestly. You might be a gov't employee, and you might not think you need it now, but you never know what will happen down the road, and if nothing else, start a college fund for your son so that by the time he's ready to go, that money will pay his way through school and set him up for a while. Besides, what would happen if there were an emergency and you needed it to fall back on for a short time? At least the money would be there. She has an obligation to that child, and should fulfill it. Even if she chooses not to be around him all of the time.