"hugs welcome"
Active Board Parent
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I think that you are amazing at being able to take care of 7 kids. I have a hard time with one no matter how much I love her. I congratulate you. It will get better just keep believing in yourself and God. How are you doing now? Shannon  |
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| Posts: 289 | Location: Toronto, Canada | Registered: 14 April 2004 |  |
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I am New to SFV
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quote: Originally posted by mary beth:
[qb]I am new and I am old. New here old in body and soul. I am falling apart and reaching out for help in any way I can. My husband of
thirteen years has left me after having an affair at his workplace. I am the mother of seven children. My oldest is 11 and the baby is 16 mnths. 4 girls 3 boys and I love them all so much. I just don't think I can do this. Its not the children though at times it is overwhelming. It is the pain and despair of being alone and broken dreams. You see I didn't even know. I thought he loved us. I believed in him. He says he loves his children and it is just me that he left and he will always be there for them. I guess I have a really hard time with that when I am the one who is here 24/7 taking them all with me to the store or anywhere I need to go except on Tues. nights for 2 hrs. and every other weekend. There is no one to help make a bottle or change a diaper, to make lunches and take to school, to do homework or talk to teachers, to be up with in the middle of the night or wake up in the morning. There is no one to help referee fights or dry tears. No one but the older children to help give me the time I need to take a shower or even go to the bathroom. And they are good children. But their mommy is not doing very good right now and I don't know that I ever will be again. People say you will meet someone that is better and right for you, what a pipedream. I have a better chance of my husband coming back and saying he is sorry and he loves me and everything will be all right. And I have finally gotten it through my head that's not going to happen. So here I am alone with seven babies and oh my God it hurts. And I know I need to be ok for them. I don't want them to see me crying anymore. I am all they have. I have often thought I should just not come back home and leave him with all the kids, but I know that would not be right. They have been hurt enough. And then I am so angry! Why do I have to do the right thing? Why can't I just run away? I pray to God everyday to help me and I guess he is because I am still here. But when does it get easier? When does the pain and lonliness end? And I feel so selfish because all I can think of is me, and I really don't want to anymore. But I don't know how to let go of the pain and anger.[/qb]
I see you have many replies from women. My name is Jamie (male) and I think you are a very strong woman to have come this far. The worst is over, its all downhill from here. My ex-fiancee left with my three children, two of which step but I care more for them than their father, and is now with someone else. I loved her and those children more than life itself. Be happy you have your children! I'm lucky to get every other weekend. My son seems like he grows 2 inches every time I see him. He talks now and I missed that. I'm missing all those day to day things that a lot of women take for granted. Don't. Cherish your children and spend as much time with them as possible. I wish I could! There is someone out there who is going to love you and your "baggage", just don't give up hope. Have faith in God, pray to him to take all of your negative feelings, problems, and wash yourself free of them. He will take care of them for you. I wasn't a beleiver until this past Easter, when I prayed in church with the pastor, and she broke up with that moron she hooked up with, realized she made a mistake, and is now in therapy trying to figure out what she wants. Who knows? anything is possible, right? Good luck and God Bless you!! Jamie |
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| Posts: 11 | Location: Orlando, FL | Registered: 13 May 2004 | |
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I am New to SFV
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I do not know personally how u feel, but i can understand the pain that your are dealing with. I have a husband newly married with 5 children and myself with 2, they range from 15-1month old. We are extremely shaky right now and only God know if we will be together on a daily basis. But, I do know this,(I can do all things through Christ that strenghtenth me) I pray daily and read my bible, I suggest to form a closer relationship with God and he will direct your path, some men & women feel that life is about material things, it is about God & family. Those that have taken these things for granite will have to answer to a higher power. Mary Beth I speak life, prosperity, faith, love and humility to you and your family. Go with with God dear.
Mother of faith and love
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| Posts: 5 | Location: Maryland | Registered: 18 May 2004 | |
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